A Reclusive Heart (Hollywood Hearts #2)(55)
Author: R.L. Mathewson

“But I don’t,” she said, sounding sad even to her own ears.

“What the hell are you talking about?” he asked tightly as he turned her around and gently placed her in the corner where she could hold herself up by propping her elbows up on the side of the pool.

He placed his hands near hers and he closed the distance once again. “I need you to help me out, baby, and tell me what else she said that upset you,” he said when she didn’t answer him.

She sighed warily as she reached out with one hand and ran her fingers through his damp hair, loving the way it felt between her fingers. “I’m not sure how she knew-,”

“Knew what?” he asked, interrupting her.

As she toyed with a strand of his hair she answered, “That this was going to end when the tour was over.”

“And that’s why you thought I’d whore myself out to keep you under my thumb?” he asked casually, but there was not missing the hurt in his tone.

She released the strand of hair she’d been playing with to run her fingers over the slight stubble covering his jaw. “Is that what your mother did?” she asked, already having figured it out from the comment he made about losing his virginity.

For a moment he didn’t say anything as he looked away from her. She thought that maybe she’d gone too far and opened her mouth to apologize when he cut her off.

“My mother was sixteen when she had me. She was a typical teenage runaway who got mixed up in drugs and sex and had parents who didn’t look too favorably on her behavior. She decided that she didn’t need them and took off for California where she thought she was going to be a movie star,” he said, ramming his fingers through his hair as he looked back at her.

“She got mixed up with the wrong kind of people very early on. When she discovered that she was pregnant her and about five friends who were also hookers rented a three bedroom apartment. They set up two of the rooms to work out of and shared the third room. When I came along the initial plan had been to give me away, but it was Christmas and most of them were young kids and thought that my birth was a sign of good times to come so they named me Nicholas,” he said with a mocking smile.

Her heart broke for him as he continued. “They set my room up in the walk in closet off their room and whenever there was a John in the house they took turns locking themselves up with me until the John left. Needless to say with six hookers in one house I spent a lot of time in that closet. When I was about four they decided I was old enough to watch out for myself.”

“You don’t have to tell me about this if you don’t want to, Nick,” she whispered as she traced his strong jaw.

“It’s fine, baby,” he said, leaning in to press a kiss against her forehead.

When he leaned back he focused all of his attention on the water between their bodies. “I didn’t think much about the women living there walking around na**d or blowing some guy on the couch while I watched my cartoons. It wasn’t until I started school and noticed that the other kids’ mothers didn’t behave like mine did.”

“As much as I hated living there,” he said tightly as his hands clenched into fists, “and how I f**king hated it, I couldn’t leave. I always thought, hoped really that my mother would wake up one day and decide to be a mother to me like the other children had, but she never changed and when I was old enough I walked away and started my own life and never looked back.”

“I’m sorry, Nick,” she said, not knowing what else to say.

“Don’t be,” he said, forcing a smile, “I’m over it.”

She didn’t think that he was. In fact she was pretty sure that the reason that he worked so hard was to put distance between himself and his past. She could relate to that. She didn’t want people knowing that she was a pushover or how pathetic she used to be. All she wanted was a chance to live her life without anyone trying to keep her down.

He looked so sad at that moment and she wanted to make it better for him, to let him know without words that he was loved. She leaned forward and brushed her lips against his. At first he didn’t move and she feared that perhaps Holly was right but then with a sigh he moved his lips against hers.

“I don’t want you to worry about anything, Jamie. I’m going to take care of you,” he promised as he gave her the sweetest kiss of her life.

As good as it sounded she knew that he wouldn’t be able to keep his word. As soon as the tour was over he was going to break her heart and she would be left with unimaginable pain, but she refused to focus on that. Right now she was in his arms and he was hers. She didn’t want to waste a second of their time together since she already knew that it wouldn’t last.

Soon the kiss turned hungry and they couldn’t stop running their hands over each other. There was really nothing better than being in Nick’s arms, she thought as she ran her hands over his wide shoulders and down his back, enjoying the feel of hard muscle tightening beneath her touch.

“Up you go, baby,” Nick said huskily against her mouth as he pressed one last kiss against her lips.

When he went to raise her out of the water she stopped him with a simple shake of her head. Frowning, he put her back in the water. He opened his mouth, probably to ask her what was wrong, when she gestured for him to get his butt out of the water. With an amused smile and a quick kiss he did just that. Once he was sitting on the edge she realized something very important.

She was kind of short.

Nick must have realized the problem because he lowered himself off the edge until his large erection was at eye level with her and although that was a pretty impressive sight she couldn’t seem to take her eyes off the muscles flexing in his arms and chest as he held himself up. When she caught his amused smile she forced herself to focus and leaned in and pressed a kiss to his hip.

She’d only done this a few times, but it was easily one of her favorite things to do for him. She knew that she probably wasn’t very good at this yet, but she was more than willing to keep trying. As she kissed and nibbled her way to the neatly trimmed patch of hair surrounding the root of the large erection that demanded her attention she couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like to take him to completion in her mouth. Whenever she thought he was close he always pulled away, but maybe now she’d get her chance, at least she hoped she would.

When she came to his erection she continued to take her time pressing teasing kisses against the hot skin until she couldn’t resist gliding her tongue over it. His low groan encouraged her to do it again. This time she took her time tracing her tongue over the thick vein that ran along the underside of his thick erection.