A Rescued Heart(22)
Author: Natalie Replogle

“Ava,” Matt snapped. “I want nothing more than to start attending church together and take this next step with you because I love you, not because you want to keep an eye on me.”

Ava didn’t back down or try to hide her irritation. “Do you not see how absolutely gorgeous she is? She obviously sees that about you.”

“Amber’s a nice girl, just overly friendly at times. That’s all.”

“Do you enjoy her flirting with you?”

“Of course not.”

“Then why haven’t you mentioned her before?” Jealously seeped through every word.

“Because she wasn’t worth mentioning to you. She just started attending my church a couple months ago and joined my small group recently. I hardly ever talk to her, Ava. She’s just an acquaintance.” He took a deep breath and his face softened. He reached for her hand, “Don’t you know I only have eyes for you?”

“Sure, but for how long?” Ava said the words before thinking them through and now there was no turning back. Regret washed over her.

He released her hand with abruptness and sat back against his chair, crossing his arms. “Seriously, Ava, we’re havingthisconversation? What do I have to do to gain your trust?” He didn’t raise his voice, but his words screamed at her.

Did it all boil down to her not trusting him? Is that what caused her to accuse him of something so uncharacteristic? No. She trusted him completely. “Matt, I’m …”

“Is there anything else I can get for you?” The waitress unknowingly interrupted before she could finish her apology.

“Yes, could I have the check, please?”

She handed Matt the bill and he immediately gave her cash. “Keep the change,” he said kindly. The waitress’s eyes widened. He must have given her quite a large tip.

He stood and pushed his chair in. “Are you ready to go?” His voice was more controlled than before but his face spoke of his displeasure.

“Yes,” she responded quietly.

Matt didn’t speak a word until they were close to the station. He drove her car and pulled over a block before the entrance. Ava looked over at him, puzzled. “I could use the walk,” he explained.

Hot tears poked at the corner of her eyes. She’d messed up, bad. “Matt, I’m so sorry. I had no right to judge you that way.”

Matt gazed out the windshield, she assumed not staring at anything, just taking time to collect his thoughts. He sighed and shut off the radio before looking back in her direction. “I know you’re sorry, but I can’t keep paying for another man’s mistakes, Ava.”

Her voice cracked, “You’re right and you have every reason to be upset with me.” She wiped the tears that streamed down her face. “I feel like damaged goods. I’ve worked through allowing myself to love you, but I guess I haven’t had a reason to work on the thought of you being interested in someone else.”

Ava expected Matt to console her when her emotions took hold of the situation, but he stayed on his side of the car with a frown upon his face. “Ava, you don’t have a reason now.” Frustration seeped from his words.

Adrenaline shot through her chest. “So much for patience!”

“What does that mean?”

“It means your words are a double-edged sword. One minute you’re saying that you want to walk with me through all my fears and then when I do struggle with something you snap.”

“Do not turn this on me, Ava.” He checked the time on his watch and released his seat belt. “I don’t have time to talk about this right now. I need to get back to work.”

He stepped out of the car before she had a chance to respond. She slipped out of her door, not sure what to do or say next. They’d had their disagreements over petty circumstances, but this was new territory. They never fought or left each other upset.

Matt met her on the sidewalk, keeping his distance. “I’ll call you later tonight.” He turned and left before she could reply. He jogged toward the department building, leaving her stranded on the curb to deal with her past that mocked her.

Ava tersely climbed into the driver’s seat and smacked her forehead with the palm of her hand. “You are such a drama queen, Ava,” she scolded herself.

She looked over her shoulder to see a man standing on the sidewalk staring at her, clearly enjoying the cuckoo show. Ava threw the car in drive and waved to her admirer.

First things first, she needed to brush off her argument with Matt. It wasn’t the best way to end their discussion, but she couldn’t do anything about it until they talked tonight. He loved her and she needed to trust that he wouldn’t walk away.

Ava couldn’t concentrate on her task of making name plates for each child’s desk. Between her argument with Matt and the gorgeous weather outside, her afternoon work needed to come to a quick end.

In the last hour she had only gotten three names done and even had to throw one away and start over. Her attention span started out weak and ended pathetic. To continue at this rate would be pointless. Coming in tomorrow would make more sense. She might actually put a dent in her overflowing “to do” pile.

As she doodled over the child’s name in front of her, thoughts of this afternoon flashed with regret in her mind. Oh, why couldn’t she have just kept her mouth shut or at the very least, put a filter on it? She had accused Matt of having feelings for another woman based on this Amber girl saying hello and flirting with him. She threw everything they had been working on right back at him like a slap in the face. Ava had offended him by her lack of trust and then snapped at him for not being supportive.

To turn it around and accuse him of not being patient was absurd and completely untrue. The text book description of patient should have a side note of Matt’s name.

If she was truly honest with herself, it wasn’t only Tim that had made mistakes in their relationship. In the hours she’d sat here pretending to do her work, her thoughts scattered from the past to the present, and the eventual realization she came to about her relationship with Tim became eye-opening.

Yes, the rejection hurt, but better to have been rejected than to have married him. Why did she allow herself to view her worth through Tim’s eyes?

Hopefully it wasn’t too late to share her new comprehension with Matt. She needed a chance to make it up to him. If that was even what he wanted anymore? A plan came together. She would go to Matt’s apartment this evening and wait on his porch and surprise him when he got home. Planning her strategy for later, she put groveling at the top of the list … and ice cream. He wouldn’t know what hit him.

Looking down at the flower she had just traced around the “i” in the child’s name, she decided it was time to put all these thoughts into action. Matt would be getting off work soon and she wanted to make sure she sat on his front steps waiting for him when he arrived.

Ava left her desk all askew with high hopes of finishing everything tomorrow. Hopefully a new day would give her better motivation. After shutting off the lights and closing the door, she made her way to the entrance. Pushing the heavy door open she squinted at the bright sun that had been disguised behind the school’s tinted glass.

Her car sat in the back parking lot. Keeping her promise, she scanned the area. Seeing it vacant, she made her way with a brisk walk to the driver’s side door.

As she fumbled with her key to unlock the door in her ancient car that had only manual locks, movement to her right stalled her process. A truck sped out from behind the utility shed, tires squealed as it stopped inches from her door, preventing her from opening it.

Ray jumped out of the truck.

Ava threw down her bags and took off in a sprint across the parking lot. Her flip-flops tore the skin between her toes as she made her way back toward the school, hoping she would have enough time to unlock the door and enter before Ray caught up with her.

Why didn’t she listen to Matt? Heed his warning? In an effort to prove she could take care of herself she had made herself a target. And one who had a dart heading right for the bull’s-eye.

Her efforts made it twenty steps before strong hands grabbed her arm, yanking her back into his solid chest. With Ray’s free hand he grabbed a fistful of her hair and dragged her back to the vehicles, wedging her between the two. Fear ripped through her chest as she screamed for help.

No one else was at the school. Traffic usually stayed sparse on this stretch of road. Ava had never felt so alone.

Ray threw her up against his truck, the back of her head slamming hard against the frame. A headache immediately coursed through her skull, causing her sight to blur from the pain. Nausea washed over her as she tried to focus and stop the spinning.

She could see Ray yelling at her, but the words didn’t making sense. His words were muffled as if her ears were plugged. Like the swimmer’s ear she would get when spending too much time underwater. He released his grip just enough that she could lift her arm and allow her head to lightly rest in her hand.

Through the fuzziness her survival mode kicked into overdrive. If she was going to walk out of this alive or at least in a hospital bed next to Kim, she needed to start talking, playing into Ray’s emotions.

She focused harder as his words became clearer. “You did this! It’s all your fault!”

Ray’s face became sharper. The strain to focus made her wince as her pulse throb inside her head with each heartbeat. His scent came as a mixture of alcohol and smoke, and the combination made her sick to her stomach. When she had first met him, he seemed polished and businesslike. Today he was a mess with his ruffled shirt, unmanaged hair and half-grown beard.

His temper tantrum continued. “She would have taken me back if it wasn’t for you!”

Ava cleared her throat, hoping she could muster her voice above a whisper.

“I’m sorry, Ray.”

“Oh, you’re sorry. Thanks, that fixes everything.”

“I was wrong. I should have left you and Kim alone. I’m so sorry.” Ava wanted to roll her eyes from the pile of lies she’d just uttered. She wasn’t sorry. Not an ounce. But she would say what he wanted to hear to survive.

He began to pace back and forth, his hands shaking as he spoke. “Everything is ruined. Kim is mine. Do you hear me?” He stopped inches from her face, his rapid breathing whipped across her skin. She kept her head down, fearful to look into his eyes.

“Ray, maybe if you got some help, she’d see how much you’ve changed.”

“Kim never had a problem with me until you came into her life.”

So much talking. It was hard to keep up with the conversation while attempting to keep a tight lid on her words. Hoping not to upset him, but knowing at this point, it probably didn’t matter.

“You were hurting her, Ray. That’s a problem, whether she said anything or not.”

“I love her. Don’t you see that?”

“You love her. The woman who is laying in a hospital bed fighting for her life because of you.” The words tumbled out. “You need help, Ray.”

“I don’t need help. I need Kim. And once you are out of her life, she’ll take me back.”

She looked up and regretted it immediately. A fire burned in his eyes, like wildfire spreading from a single spark, sweeping across his features, out of control, powerful, unstoppable. She could feel the heat from his anger as if his skin was a smoldering ember.

His hand closed around her throat, stifling the air that needed to escape her lungs. From behind his back he pulled out a gun with his other hand and jammed it in her face. As she looked down the barrel all pride evaporated as she whimpered, “Please don’t do this. I promise I’ll leave Kim alone. I promise. Please …”

Matt turned on his signal and exited onto the road that led him straight to Ava’s elementary school. His SWAT training had ended early and he needed to right some wrongs with her. When he had some space from her, he realized her words held some truth. She had no right to accuse him of being interested in another woman, but he’d let his frustration burst through the seams.

Her accusations about him and Amber had hurt. In all honesty, her battles were getting old and he didn’t know how else to help her. But that was the key point. He couldn’t rescue her heart or make the difference to help her see clearly, it would have to be God.

Matt assumed she would still be at the school prepping her room. When she worked on projects for school, all time diminished for her. Hours felt like minutes in her time frame. He had decided not to call her and just show up. This conversation needed to happen in person.

As he pulled into the main parking lot he was surprised not to see her car. Pulling out his phone to call her he remembered that she usually liked to park in the back lot, which was closer to her room. Making his way around the building, adrenaline shot through his veins as he spotted what looked like the description of Ray’s truck next to her car. Making his way closer he sucked in a jagged breath as he caught sight of Ava up against his truck with a gun pointed at her face.

With the phone still in his hand, he called 911, gave the school name, information about the emergency, and demanded backup as quickly as he could.

Ray’s back was to him and he didn’t know if he would be able to get to him before the sound of his car would be heard. Approaching in his cruiser would immediately put Ray on the defense. He was already crazy enough, but if he felt backed into a corner, Matt honestly didn’t know what he’d do.

With a last-minute plan, he came to a stop, quick enough to keep up with his adrenaline, but not enough that his tires screeched. Slamming the car into park, he opened his door and took off on foot, hoping to catch Ray off guard.

This couldn’t be happening. Especially not after the way they had left each other today. Why did he have to argue with her like that and then just leave? He could have burned a hole through the back of Ray’s head from his fierce anger.