A Shadow of Light

In the deepest recesses of my heart, where goodness and bravery and what was left of my conscience still thrived, I knew that what my daughter was saying was the truth. Only Vivienne was able to access those parts of myself that I had to turn off in order to survive the past centuries, but her words were difficult to swallow. “Was everything I did for The Shade all those years for nothing, Vivienne?”

“Everything we did was to prepare for Derek’s awakening, so that he could fulfill the prophecy and bring our kind to true sanctuary. I thought that much was clear to you, Father.”

My jaw tightened as a battle waged inside of me—a battle I was afraid I could never win.

Vivienne kneeled up on the bed—slowly and carefully—so that she could face me and look into my eyes. The moment her blue-violet gaze bore into my eyes, I knew that she knew what was behind the mask of confidence and courage I was trying to keep up.

Her face fell and a tear ran down her cheek. “The darkness has gotten to you, hasn’t it?” she asked, her voice clearly about to break.

I nodded, affirming her worst fears. She’d spent hundreds of years trying to protect me from the darkness and to sit there and look her in the eye and tell her that she’d lost me was heartbreaking.

“I’m so sorry, Father. I didn’t think… I had hoped…” She choked on her own words and tears began streaming down her face.

I pulled her into my arms, and let her sob into my chest, not knowing what to say or do in order to console her.

“Have I failed you so badly, Vivienne?” I asked, my own voice choked with the tears I was trying to hold back.

She shook her head into my chest and kissed me on the cheek. “No, Father. It’s not too late yet. You can fight this, but you have to listen to what I’m saying. You have to be a father to Derek. He is not your nemesis. You need to honor the prophecies. If you fail in this, Father, the darkness is going to use you to destroy us all.”

Her words made me sink into deep despair, knowing fully well the weight of what she was telling me. Despite my fears that I could never do what she was asking of me, I nodded. She didn’t have to know how weak her father was. She didn’t have to know that it might be too late, that the darkness already had too firm a grip of me.

“I’ll do that, Vivienne.” I lied. “I can’t allow myself to be your downfall.”

Even as I said the words, a hiss echoed from within me—dark and menacing—full of spite and with a hint of amusement. You’re a fool, Gregor Novak. It’s your weakness that will destroy them all, and your beloved princess will be the first to fall.

CHAPTER 40: CLAUDIA

I couldn’t stand being inside my penthouse. It reminded me of how much I’d allowed darkness to take over me since I had turned into a vampire. I had become exactly like the monster that I’d hated. I became exactly like the Duke. The memories of everything that had happened inside that place haunted me. All the horrors I put Ben, and so many young men like him, through began to replay in my mind. I could almost feel their presence inside my home. I hated who I was when I was with them.

I hated Lucas, but I reminded myself that I was just like him—evil to the core—so he was one of the few people who frequented my home. The other person was Yuri.

Thus, when I heard a knock at the door, it was easy to surmise who it was, considering Lucas’ grisly demise back at The Oasis. I found myself shaking as I made my way to the door. I opened it and gulped when I saw Yuri standing on my doorstep.

I was expecting him to say something mean or give me a condescending glare. We were known around The Shade for our frequent fights and irritable banter. This time, however, he just stared at me and I stared back.

When I saw a tear run down his cheek, it was my complete undoing.

“Yuri…” I choked out.

“I can’t believe you left, Claudia.”

The dynamic between us radically changed. I began to sob, because for the first time in the past centuries I’d co-existed with Yuri, I felt completely vulnerable and exposed to him. I guess I always was. I just had trouble admitting it to myself: that he knew me even more than I knew myself. He saw right through the hard, wicked exterior I’d been putting up.

“I’m so sorry, Yuri,” I managed to say in between my sobs. “I never should’ve left. I was a fool to leave. I just…” I wiped away my tears and tried to get a hold of myself. “I know how loyal you are to Derek. I should be too. After everything he’s done for us…for The Shade…but I just…”

“Shut up, Claudia…” he said gently as he stepped into my home and closed the door behind him. “Just shut up and stop torturing yourself over the past. You’re back. That’s what matters.”

To my surprise, he grabbed me by the waist and lifted me into his arms and kissed me. Passionate at first, but he must have remembered who I was, because his kiss became gentle, tender…much like a sweet caress as his tongue softly pushed past my lips.

When our lips parted, I could feel myself blushing. He gently laid me back down on the ground and both of us were in a stunned silence for a couple of minutes.

“Have you forgiven me, Claudia?” he asked.

I looked up at him questioningly. “What do you mean?”

“For that night… That night when I…” He choked.

He didn’t have to finish. I knew what night he was referring to. I remained silent as I searched myself for an answer. I decided to tell him the absolute truth. “I couldn’t forgive you until I realized how much I’ve made both you and myself suffer for my bitterness. I forgave you the moment I realized that you are the only man I’ve ever loved, Yuri, but I also know that I could never be worthy of you.”

His face took on a grim expression as he shook his head. “Don’t say that. You are the only woman I’ve ever wanted, Claudia.”

He retrieved something from his pocket and my breath hitched when I saw what it was. The folded piece of parchment, tattered and browned throughout the years, but still the symbol of a walk in the woods, of an innocence stolen from both of us.

“This time, I won’t take it back,” he said, as he handed it to me.

Trembling, I took the paper and opened it up, looking at the image it contained. Upon seeing it, I couldn’t bear the idea of looking into his face. “How could you still want me, Yuri? I’m so broken.”

“We’re all broken, Claudia, but none of us are beyond fixing.”

His lips once again pressed against mine and when he whispered the words I longed to hear for centuries, I couldn’t respond with anything but a grateful: “Yes.”

His words were, “Let me love you.”

CHAPTER 41: SOFIA

Dinner with Aiden was awkward to say the least. He was sitting at the head of the table and there seemed to be many things he wasn’t comfortable about—primarily the fact that Derek and I were sitting next to each other and ignoring our food as we acted like the teenagers that we were—or at least I was—fooling around and playing footsie, or Rob making a face at us, or Madeline giggling with delight at how sweet we were.

Lily seemed pleased with us. Gavin didn’t seem to care. Rosa was too busy staring at Gavin to really notice. Ian and Anna decided to opt out of the awkwardness and eat elsewhere.

Aiden, on the other hand, expressed his irritation by making a scene out of banging his spoon and fork over his plate every chance he got.

“Are you drumming, Sofia’s father?” Rob asked. “Ian sometimes makes some music with a bunch of old cans. He’s really good at it.”

Aiden dropped his utensils on his plate, which he promptly pushed away so that he could lean his elbows over the wooden table. “Soooo…” he said. “You haven’t told me whether or not you’re going to let the hunters come…”

Derek and I exchanged uncomfortable glances.

“Well, we haven’t discussed it properly yet. If you want an answer now, I think the answer is no…” I replied, shifting my weight on my seat, gearing myself up for a confrontation.

“The sooner the hunters come, the sooner I get to administer the cure, the sooner we get to get out of here.”

I raised a brow at my father. “We?”

“You’re not saying that you’re not coming back with me, are you, Sofia? I thought…”

“Dad…what would I do back at headquarters? Train to be a hunter? My life is here at The Shade.”

“Sofia, you can’t seriously be… You don’t even have to stay at headquarters. I want you to live your life and it’s definitely not here.”

“If the cure works, then Derek would be human too.” I glanced at Derek and smiled, hope surging within me at the possibility of us being together. “If he decides to leave The Shade, then I’m going with him. If he decides to stay, then that’s where I’ll be.”

I knew that I was tearing my father apart. I felt bad for him. I didn’t want him to be unhappy. He was my father and I loved him, but as much as I wanted to be a part of his life, I couldn’t leave behind my own life just to cater toward his hatred for the vampires.

“I’m sorry, but a life as a hunter isn’t the life for me. Ben found that hard to accept too, but it holds true.”

I felt Derek take my hand underneath the table and squeeze hard. Aiden’s shoulders sagged with disappointment. I guess he knew me well enough to know that once I set my heart and mind on something, there was no way he could dissuade me to do otherwise.

“Sofia and I will discuss the hunters’ arrival tonight and let you know by breakfast, Aiden,” Derek spoke up in an attempt to appease my sulking father.

Aiden shot a glare at him, narrowing his eyes at the vampire. “You’re not suggesting that my daughter will spend the night with you, are you?”

“Well…” Derek swallowed hard.

“What? So you can feed on her all night?” Aiden’s eyes suddenly grew wide open with horror. “You two haven’t already slept together, have you?”