Bad Romeo (Starcrossed #1)(72)
Author: Leisa Rayven

The juncture of my thighs lights up at the thought.

I lean more heavily against the pillar.

“If you really want our show to be a hit,” he says as his gaze flickers between my eyes and mouth, “then you’d agree to let me kiss you. Right now. In front of all of these people.”

He stares at me, and all I can do is gaze at his lips while my lust wages war with my fear.

“Just say yes, Cassie. Don’t overthink it.”

His mouth is close. Almost too close for me to deny him anything.

“Ethan…”

“No, not ‘Ethan.’ ‘Yes’. Or better yet, ‘Yes, please, God, kiss me before we both go insane.’ Either works for me. ‘Fuck, yes!’ with an accompanying fist pump is also acceptable.”

I have to smile.

God, I love him.

I gasp.

Whoa.

So not ready to face that reality yet.

He reads the panicked expression my face and drops his head in defeat. “Okay, fine, no kissing, but let me tell you, it’s a wasted opportunity. Alcohol?”

“Yes, please.”

“Oh, so you can say ‘yes, please’ to booze but not to me? Nice. Taylor, if our show tanks, just know it’s because you didn’t get on board with my make-out-with-Ethan-as-often-as-possible publicity plan. I hope you can live with that decision.”

I laugh and slap his arm. “Vodka cocktail, please.”

“Yeah, whatever.” He fake-sulks as he makes his way through the crowd toward the bar, and as soon as he leaves my side, I miss him.

I step out of the alcove and take a deep breath.

As beautiful, and patient, and hilarious as he’s being, there’s still a shard of something inside me that twists and burns without reason or warning, and it terrifies me, because sometimes it makes me feel like the specter of our past will always be hanging over us, making me push him away even when I want him closer.

I feel a hand slide around my waist, and I flinch in surprise as I turn to see a familiar face.

“Connor!”

Oh, God, Connor.

“Hey, Cassie,” he says and leans in to kiss my cheek. “How have you been?”

“Really well. You?”

What’s he doing here? Leave. Please, leave now.

“I’m great. Just about to open in the new production of Arcadia down at the Ethel Barrymore Theatre.”

“I heard! That’s fantastic. I can’t wait to come and see it.”

“Well, let me know when you want to come, and I’ll get you house seats.”

“That’d be great.”

I’ll never come and see it. He knows that. I’ve ruined our friendship.

I’m a fucking terrible person.

We lapse into silence and just look at each other for a few seconds as awkwardness settles between us.

“You look beautiful,” he says, and I glance down because I really can’t look him in the eyes anymore. “As usual.”

“Connor…”

“How’s the play going?” he asks, changing the subject. “Must be weird working with Ethan again, huh?”

I look over and see Holt at the bar, waiting to be served.

“Yep.” I tuck my hair behind my ear and push down my rising panic. “Weird is one word for it. Does he know you’re here?”

He shakes his head. “No. I wanted to see you first. Say hi. I … I wasn’t sure how much you’ve told him about us. I didn’t want things to be awkward.”

I sigh. Awkward seems to be where I live these days. Right there on the corner of Freak-Out Avenue.

“I haven’t told him anything,” I say, wishing Connor would leave before Holt comes back, “and I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t mention it. We open in a week, and I don’t want to cause drama.”

“Don’t tell me you’re back together?” he asks, his face turning dark.

“No. We’re not. We’re just … we’re trying to be friends.”

When I look over, Holt’s walking toward us, and I feel like I’m going to have a stroke, my heart’s beating so fast.

Connor follows my gaze as a wry smile settles on his face. “Well, I guess some things never change. I can’t believe that after what he did to you, you’re still completely in love with him.”

I look at him sharply. “That’s not true.”

“Oh, please, Cassie. Even when you claimed to hate him, you were so fixated, you couldn’t see other options that were right in front of you.”

“Connor—”

“I would have never hurt you like he did. But I guess it’s all just history now, huh?”

He shrugs it off, but I know how much damage I did, and that knowledge makes me feel like garbage.

“I just hope you know what the hell you’re doing, because if he hurts you again…” He shakes his head. “You deserve to be happy, Cassie. That’s all I’m saying.”

I nod. Things might have been so different if I could have made things work with Connor. But I couldn’t. I tried. We both know I really tried.

“Hey, Connor!” Holt hands me my drink and then shakes Connor’s hand. To his credit, he looks genuinely pleased to see him. I, on the other hand, am on the verge of two worlds colliding and am about to pass out. “I heard you were doing Arcadia, man. Congratulations. The cast looks awesome.”

Connor plasters on a smile. “Hey, Ethan. Yeah, it’s great. Bookings are going well, so we’re hoping for a nice, long run.”

Holt smiles and gestures toward the bar. “Can I get you a drink? They have some decent imported beer. Or if you want to live dangerously, I could get you one of these pink monstrosities Taylor’s drinking, although I’m pretty sure it’s made from just vodka and sugar.”

Connor looks at me and smiles, but there’s sadness in his eyes. “Yeah, well … she always did have questionable taste.”

Something shifts in the air, and when I look back at Holt he’s staring at Connor, his smile fading. Suddenly I think it’s really important that Connor leaves.

As if he senses the building tension, Connor says, “Well, it’s been great seeing you guys but I’ve got to get back to the rest of my cast. Hope you can come down one night and see the show.” He looks at both of us as he says it, but I know he’s only talking to me.

“See you, Ethan,” he says, his voice less than friendly. Then he kisses my cheek and whispers, “Take care of yourself, Cassie. Please.”