Before Jamaica Lane (On Dublin Street #3)(25)
Author: Samantha Young

I shattered. Loudly. My eyes fluttered behind their lids as my lower body shuddered uncontrollably, jerking hard against Nate as he gripped my h*ps tightly to his and followed me into cli**x.

When I finally stopped coming, my muscles relaxed to jelly. I think I melted into my mattress, just barely able to lift my arm and curl a hand around Nate’s nape as he collapsed over me, his head buried in the crook of my neck.

I delighted in the feel of his chest rising and falling quickly against mine, of his warm breath puffing against my skin. We were both slick with sweat and I didn’t care. It felt wonderful.

‘So that’s what real sex is like,’ I breathed, in awe of it and in awe of the pleasure he’d elicited from my barely tried body.

Nate’s lips pressed against my damp neck before he raised his head and pushed himself up. Our eyes met and I stilled. There was something stirring to life in his gaze, something important, possibly profound. Other than when he spoke of Alana, I’d never seen him look so serious. So grave. He stared at me a long moment until … his head jerked back as if I’d said something.

‘Nate?’

His Adam’s apple moved with a hard swallow before he kissed me quickly and rolled off of me.

I couldn’t say anything. I didn’t know what to say.

Instead I lay there as he walked out of the room. I listened as I heard the water running in the bathroom and then the toilet flushing. There was rustling in the living room and I heard a thump, like a boot against my wooden floor.

That got me up.

I tugged on my sheet, hauled it off the bed and wrapped it around me.

Wandering out of the bedroom, I found him shrugging his jacket on.

‘Nate?’

He smiled at me, but there was something false in it and my heart immediately began beating faster.

‘Nate?’

‘I’ll, eh … have to text you when I’m free again.’

Something strange, solid and cold, settled in my stomach, but I attempted not to let it show as I shuffled in my sheet over to the glass bowl I kept my keys in. I lifted my spare and held it out to him. ‘To make things easier. For our lessons,’ I emphasized.

He gazed at it a moment and then eventually, just as my hand was beginning to tremble, he strode over to take it. He kissed me quickly on the cheek as though he might get burned if he lingered.

‘ ’Night, babe.’

Watching him hurry out of my apartment, I couldn’t force a reply past the lump of apprehension in my throat.

I’d been worried all day. Worried something had happened in my room last night that had made Nate rethink this whole lesson thing. Or worse, our whole friendship thing. When he didn’t text in the morning, I gnawed my lip. When he didn’t text in the afternoon, I snapped at a boorish student who somehow blamed me for his fifty-pound fine, and when Nate didn’t text as I was walking home from work I began to despair that I’d seriously effed up our friendship.

The joy I should have felt after our first lesson, the relief of realizing that I’d feared sex only to discover how easy and natural it felt, was overwhelmed by the regret that waited in the wings just ready to be prompted to center stage by Nate’s prolonged absence.

I ignored a text from Ellie and didn’t answer a call from Jo as I picked at dinner, changed into an overlarge T-shirt that I wore to bed when the weather got a little warmer, and sat down in front of the television to not take in a word of the movie that was playing.

It was a total surprise then when a key turned in my lock and the door opened to reveal Nate carrying a DVD, notebook, and pen.

I didn’t know what to make of it.

He smiled at me, a real smile this time, as if nothing had happened last night, and he strode forward, dumping his stuff on the coffee table.

I had my feet on the couch, my arms clasped around my bent knees.

Nate’s gaze flickered over my bare legs as he took off his jacket. Our eyes met. And held.

He cleared his throat. ‘Lesson first and then I have a movie to review.’

Part of me really wanted to question him and his weird, erratic behavior. But a bigger part of me was afraid of the answers. Or the consequences. ‘Tonight’s lesson?’

He kicked off his shoes. ‘Tonight’s about confidence. Taking control.’

And just like that I realized I was mad at him for the way he’d walked out last night. Really effing mad.

It took over me, turning me into someone else.

Dropping my feet to the floor, I reached out and grabbed his belt, hauling him closer to me. ‘Sit down,’ I demanded, my voice cold even to my ears.

A spark of uncertainty appeared in his eyes at my tone. But he complied, lowering himself onto the couch beside me.

I lost no time in making my move.

Straddling him, I gripped his hair in my hands and kissed him hard. His arms banded around me and just as easy as that, Nate took back control of the kiss.

Fine, no kissing.

Pulling away, I gently pressed him back with a hand to his chest.

‘Well?’ he asked, his voice low, eyes questioning. ‘What now?’

In answer I began unbuckling his belt, quickly unbuttoning his jeans so I could slip my hand inside. Nate hissed as I fisted him.

‘Feel good?’ I purred across his mouth, a part of me floating on the outside of this little scene and wondering who the hell I thought I was.

‘What do you think?’ Nate narrowed his eyes, stroking his hands up my thighs and taking the hem of my nightshirt with them.

I released him so I could remove his hands from me. Shaking my head, I tutted at him. ‘No touching.’

Displeasure darkened his eyes. He didn’t like that.

Good.

I tugged at his jeans and he lifted his hips, helping me free his erection. I didn’t bother pulling them all the way down. Instead I pushed down my panties, moving off him so I could kick them off before straddling him again.

‘Take off the nightdress,’ Nate insisted. When I didn’t move, he rubbed a hand over my thigh, his expression gentling. ‘Liv, I want to see you.’

I stilled, tilting my head to the side as I studied him carefully. ‘You do?’

There was so much more in my question than I wished there was.

And just like that Nate understood completely. ‘I want you. I want you to ride my c*ck and I want you to ride it hard. And then afterwards I want to sit with my friend, eat some food, and watch a movie with her. I’m not going anywhere.’ His grip tightened. ‘Now take off your nightdress.’

His assurance made the anger slowly ebb away and as it did I returned to my senses. I flushed at my actions, at my demands, at my cold confidence. Nate relaxed too, with a smug aspect in his eyes when he caught sight of my blush.

In an ironic effort to hide my renewed self-consciousness I lifted the nightdress up over my head and threw it behind me. I didn’t even get a chance to say or do anything before I felt Nate’s hand on my upper back between my shoulder blades along with the power in his body as he held me to him, his lips sucking on my nipple.

I arched into him, sighing as pleasure instantly coursed through me.

He played me for a while, thinking to make me pliant, but I still had his lessons in mind. He wanted me to learn sexual confidence, and although I had no intention of letting my anger fuel it again, I had every intention of retesting its waters.

As Nate had already pointed out, I was an overachiever.

I moved over him, pressing him back into the couch. ‘Put it inside me.’

His lips curled at the corners. ‘You put me inside you.’

So I did.

I whimpered against his mouth as he sucked in a deep breath.

And then I moved.

I tried to go slow, to take it easy, to build it, but I was too impatient, too desperate for it.

Too greedy.

Too inexperienced.

Yet Nate let me control it.

And by his doing so, we both came hard but much too fast.

I leaned against him, curling my arms around his shoulders as he wrapped his arms around my waist and held me close. ‘I guess I’m still learning,’ I admitted breathlessly.

Hearing my uncertainty, Nate gently lifted me away, his expression sincere as he confessed, ‘No woman has ever ridden me that hard. Believe me, babe, I’m not complaining.’

Smirking through my embarrassment, I asked, ‘Really?’

Nate grinned as he swept a strand of my hair behind my ear. ‘Really.’

It wasn’t until I lifted myself off him that the mood changed dramatically. A single expletive fell from Nate’s lips.

‘What?’ I asked, wide-eyed, glancing down at his lap to make sure I hadn’t hurt him.

‘No condom,’ he bit out.

‘It’s okay, I’m on the pill.’

He frowned at me as he pulled his underwear and jeans back up. ‘Liv, I only went to the clinic yesterday. I still haven’t gotten the results back.’

At that I pulled my panties up and hurried around the couch to go clean up in the bathroom. ‘I’m sure you’re fine,’ I threw over my shoulder, my heart pounding. I hoped he was fine. Shit. I shut the bathroom door and leaned on the sink, staring into the mirror in front of me. My cheeks were flushed and my eyes were golden bright. I looked thoroughly f**ked. I was. And I’d been in such a rush to get a taste of what was clearly becoming an addiction that I’d forgotten about protection.

Now, if I had kids, I’d forever be a hypocrite when I lectured them about it.

I admonished myself to hell and back, and then it occurred to me that it wasn’t just my fault. Nate had forgotten too. I glared at the door and instantly grimaced. I could argue that he was supposed to be the experienced one here, but that didn’t really wash when you were twenty-six years old and knew better.

Hearing the noise of the television, I wandered back out of the bathroom to find that Nate had the DVD playing while he was in the kitchen putting together bagels. Suddenly my stomach growled.

Nate glanced up at me. ‘I’m sorry I forgot the condom.’

‘I forgot too. But it’ll be okay. Right?’

‘I’ve never forgotten protection before tonight, so we should be fine. But we really need to be more careful.’ He licked cream cheese off his thumb and turned to the fridge for some soda.

Deciding I didn’t want another weird ending to our evening, I thought it best not to say any more, so I changed the subject. ‘What are we watching tonight?’

Nate handed me my bagel and I thanked him, then followed him to the couch. To my surprise he sat closer than usual, putting his feet up on the table and settling in at my side. ‘It’s a musical.’

I choked on a bite of the bagel and quickly swallowed so I could ask incredulously, ‘Are you kidding me?’

Smirking, he shook his head. ‘It’s a satirical musical.’

‘Does that make it any better?’

‘Let’s hope so.’

As it turned out, the musical was pretty funny at first, but it soon started to go downhill. Clearly bored, Nate took a sip of his Coke and with his eyes trained on the screen, asked, ‘Would you rather live in a musical or a post-apocalyptic world?’

I immediately smiled, so unbelievably relieved to be hanging out with my friend just like always and answering his weird questions. ‘What kind of post-apocalyptic world?’