Big Girl Backstage Pass (Big Girl #1)(4)
Author: Aubrey Rose

Julian helped her up, and then Shannon was standing next to him, her waist encircled by his arm. She could feel the pressure of his hand on her hip, and her heart beat faster.

“Have a good night, ladies,” he said to the blond girls. They didn’t reply, too stunned to say a word. Shannon couldn’t help but smirk at them before she let herself be led away by Julian.

As they passed through the doorway to the outside hall, Shannon had a flash of insecurity. She had agreed to come with him so easily, and he seemed so casually possessive – did he think that she was like the other obsessed fans, that she would be an easy lay? Maybe that’s why he had chosen her, because she wasn’t the prettiest, thinnest girl in the room. Maybe he just wanted a good time with no strings attached, and she was the easiest target. Maybe he was drunk. He didn’t seem drunk, even though he had been downing shot after shot.

“Hey there,” Julian said, squeezing her around her waist.

“Huh?” Shannon replied.

“You’re off in your mind somewhere else,” he said. He stopped her and pulled her aside in the hallway. A handful of fans had gathered at the back entrance twenty feet away, and they were staring at Shannon and Julian.

“Sorry,” she said.

“You don’t have to be sorry,” Julian said. “But you look worried. What’s up?”

“Nothing.” She flashed her broadest smile at him, trying to relax. Don’t f**k this up, Shannon. “Everything is great.”

Julian reached up and brushed a lock of her hair behind one ear. Another electric shock passed through his fingers to her skin, and she bit down on her lip to keep from shivering. The fans at the entrance were talking, she was sure, about her and the guitarist, whispering in hushes and stealing glances over at them. They must be thinking that she was so lucky.

“We don’t have to go anywhere if you don’t want to,” Julian said. “I just thought you looked uncomfortable with those other girls.”

Shannon let out a laugh that seemed forced to her ears.

“They weren’t the nicest girls,” she admitted. Julian frowned, and Shannon mentally kicked herself. “I mean, they were nice enough, I guess—”

“Did they say something to you?” Julian asked. His voice was full of concern, and Shannon found her eyes filling with tears involuntarily.

“It’s just—” Shannon’s voice cracked, and she tilted her head down quickly so that Julian wouldn’t see. Deep breath, Shannon. Come on. Then she felt Julian’s arm come around her shoulder and give her a gentle hug. It was the most comforting gesture, and it made her tear up even more. He was so generous, even to a stupid blubbery fan like her.

“Well, I can’t say I blame you. They seemed like total bitches to me.”

Shannon looked up in surprise to see Julian grinning down at her. He gave her another squeeze around the waist and she felt a rush of relief pass through her body.

“They were total bitches!” she cried out, laughing through her tears.

Julian laughed with her.

“Come on then. Let’s blow this popsicle stand,” he said jokingly. He tilted his head towards the fans. “Otherwise I think I’m going to have to sign a million more autographs.”

Shannon wiped her face, sniffing just a bit. He still wanted her to come with him. She felt buoyant, her spirits completely lifted. She hoped her mascara wasn’t running.

“Alright,” she said, trying her hardest to lighten up. “Let’s make like a tree and get out of here.”

Julian chuckled. As his hand circled her waist, she sucked in her stomach automatically. They walked towards the entryway and outside to the top of the stairs, where hundreds of fans immediately surged toward them. There were guardrails along the walkway, with security guards posted along the side, and everyone was leaning forward, their arms outstretched toward Julian.

Shannon paused at the top of the stairway, the flashes of cameras blinding her. She tensed up, readying herself for Julian to let go, but he never did. She swallowed hard, looking around at the throngs of people screaming at them. It was overwhelming.

Julian squeezed her, and she felt the reassuring pressure of his hand through the thin fabric of her dress.

“Ready?” he whispered in her ear. She noticed for the first time the limo waiting for them at the bottom of the walkway.

As they walked through the crowd, Julian waved at all of his fans. Shannon tried to smile, her attention mostly focused on not falling over in her high heels. Everybody was looking at them, screaming and trying to get Julian’s attention. Shannon felt dizzy with giddiness. She was the one who was walking with him, and she held her chin up proudly, shaking her red hair out behind her.

They reached the limo, and Julian opened the door for her, holding her hand as she got in carefully. He climbed in after her, waving one last time to the crowd before closing the car door. Shannon could still see the cameras flashing through the tinted windows as the limo pulled away. The divider was up and they could not see the limo driver. Shannon looked around. There was a bar installed on one side of the limo, and red-tinted LED lights lit the interior dimly. Wow.

Julian poured himself a gin and tonic from the side bar, light on the tonic.

“Want something?” he asked. Shannon shook her head. She could stick her foot in her mouth well enough without being drunk; she didn’t need any alcohol to make her dizzier than she already was. Julian shrugged, gulping the entire contents down in two swallows.

“Whew,” Julian said, leaning back into the leather seat. He yawned, stretching his arm around her shoulder mischievously as he did.

“It must be exhausting to do a show like that every night,” Shannon said.

“Not the show,” Julian said, turning to her. “The show gives me energy. Playing music…”

His eyes glazed over distantly, and he smiled with a faraway look on his face.

“It’s something else,” he said. “It’s the only thing that wakes me up.”

Shannon felt his arm tighten around her, and she leaned back into his embrace as the limo rounded a corner. She was nervous. He hadn’t done anything else but hold her, and she wondered why he had brought her here.

“So it’s the other stuff that makes you tired?”

“Yeah,” he said. “God, I thought I was going to have to talk about Fiji for another hour with those girls.”

Shannon giggled.

“Well, when I went to Fiji on my third favorite yacht I found the five-star dining simply exquisite,” she said.

“Did you now?” he said, playing along. “But the walk from the clubhouse to the cabana is just so tiring.”

“Oh, I just have my poolboys carry me on my chaise lounge from place to place,” Shannon said, waving her hand in the air elegantly. Her nerves were starting to dissipate. “That way I don’t have to worry about spilling my margarita on the way over.”

“What a brilliant idea.”

“But don’t get me started on the horrible way they treat you at the beach resorts. When I asked for a personal scuba team to bring me a school of manta rays to swim with, do you know what happened?”

“What on earth happened?” Julian rested his chin in his palm.

“They could only find TWO manta rays,” Shannon said. “Is that a school? I don’t think that’s a school.”

“Not even close. What terrible service.”

“I’m never going to Fiji again. At least in Rio they try to make you happy on vacation. My god.”

They both cracked up, and Shannon felt herself relax. She was caught off guard when Julian pulled her into a kiss, his lips pressing hard against hers.

She felt his hand slide up her waist, and she let out a small gasp. Julian’s face was inches from hers, his nose grazing her cheek.

“So you’ve got a sense of humor,” he said. “I like that.”

“It’s all I’ve got,” she said, blushing. It was true. She had never been popular because of her weight, so she had learned to make people laugh. Boys never liked her, but at least she hadn’t been reviled.

“That’s not all you’ve got,” Julian said. He kissed her cheek, letting his lips flutter over her skin. She felt her entire body respond to his touch, her heart leaping as his mouth moved over her neck and breathed close to her ear.

“Seems to me you’ve got quite a lot more,” he whispered. His arms were around her and his hands were pressing against her waist. She flushed harder.

“A lot more in the hips, maybe,” she said, biting down on the words.

Julian pulled back, and she ached for the touch of his embrace. She was always saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. God, Shannon, you’re such an idiot.

“Hey,” Julian said. Shannon couldn’t speak. Julian’s hand caressed her cheek, moving down over her shoulder. “Don’t talk like that.”

Shannon opened her mouth to reply, but there was a lump in her throat and she felt her eyes welling up with tears for the second time that night. He would think she was just a big fat crybaby. It was so stupid. She had a chance with the sexiest rock star ever, and she was blowing it bit by bit.

“I just—” She choked up.

“What is it?”

“I just don’t know why you wanted me to come with you.”

There. There it was. There was no reason for him to have picked her over anybody else, and she knew it.

“Well,” he said, “you mean beside the fact that you’re sexy as hell in that dress?”

She forced out a grim chuckle.

“Or beside the fact that I have a thing for gorgeous redheads who can make me crack a smile?”

She shook her head.

“You’re surrounded by like, supermodels, all the time,” Shannon said. “I’m—” She couldn’t finish the sentence. I’m fat. I’m lumpy.

“You were the most beautiful woman there, and you’re here with me now.” Julian’s voice was firm. He pulled her into another kiss and this time she arched herself into it. His hands moved over her curves possessively, and she felt herself relaxing, letting go at his command. He wanted her, didn’t he? Why else would he have brought her here, into his limo? He could have had any girl at that show, any girl at all. But he picked her.

Julian’s lips moved ardently, sending little electric shocks of pleasure down her spine. He sucked on her bottom lip, teasing her with his tongue. His hand moved to her knee, his warm fingers sliding up underneath her tight dress between her thighs. She moaned softly, her fingers splayed across his chest in a show of sweet reluctance.

“Shannon,” Julian whispered. “Let me…”

She would have let him do anything. Most guys who came on to her wanted her to suck them off, or wanted to f**k her from behind. Right now she would have done anything, all of it, all for him. He was so perfect. And so kind.

“What do you want me to do?” she asked. Instead of answering, his hand slid farther up between her legs, and she felt his fingers stroking her there, through her underwear. She gasped.