Born of Silence (The League Gen 1 #4)(23)
Author: Sherrilyn Kenyon

Especially in the middle of the night.

He’d just found a bag of outdated bread when he’d heard a faint scraping sound behind him in the shadows. Thinking it was one of the restaurant’s late night cleaning crew, he’d broken out into a sweat, terrified that they’d call the authorities on him.

But it had been something much worse.

Nykyrian had snatched him down from the dumpster and slammed him on the ground so hard he’d seen stars from it. Cursing him, Nyk had pinned him with one massive forearm across his throat. “No one f**ks with my ship, you little bastard,” he’d growled. “Believe me, it’s worth more than your putrid life. I don’t care what your uncle pays for your protection or what the League does to me. You’re going to die for defiling it.”

Darling had tried to push Nykyrian’s arm off so that he could breathe, but it was useless. Nyk was too strong. All he could do was cough and wheeze.

Until Nykyrian saw the original scar Ryn had given him that covered the entire left half of his face, and the bruises on his cheek and black eye from his uncle that still, three days later, looked like shit.

Before Darling could regain his senses and to his eternal shame, Nyk had yanked his shirt up to see the other bruises and scars that covered his torso. Then, he’d grabbed Darling’s wrists to examine the scars that Darling had made on his own body when he’d been unable to take his uncle’s bullshit anymore…

“They beat you?” Nyk had asked.

Darling had shoved him away and scooted out from under him. “Why do you think I run? Do you really think I enjoy eating garbage out of dumpsters in the middle of the night when I could be warm at home in a palace?”

Little had he known then that Nyk had endured a childhood that made his seem like paradise in comparison.

Instead of killing him, which would have been preferable all things considered, Nyk had shrugged his coat off and wrapped it around Darling’s shoulders. There was so much difference in their height and build back then that his coat had swallowed Darling whole.

“C’mon, kid, let’s get you fed and cleaned up.”

Darling had stood his ground. “I don’t want to go back.”

“I know… I do. But we both know that you have no choice. If I don’t take you back, someone else will, and they won’t feed you first.”

Disgusted by the fact that Nyk was right, he’d lowered his head and nodded glumly.

“Don’t worry, kid. Now that I know what you’re running from, I’ll give you as much protection as I can.”

“Why would you do that?”

“Because no one deserves to be afraid to go home.”

From that night on, Nyk had done his damnedest to keep him safe. Sometimes it’d worked.

Others…

Darling sighed as he ran his fingers through Zarya’s hair. “After Nyk saw the condition I was in, he told me he would do his best to keep me out of the line of fire, and that he would teach me how to protect myself.”

“He trained you as an assassin?”

Darling nodded.

“Is that where your tattoo came from?”

“Yeah. After I’d completed my training, Hauk, who is an old childhood friend of Nyk’s, designed it for me and his brother Fain was the one who did it.” Darling wouldn’t have trusted anyone else to touch him that intimately. But the Hauks had always been good friends to him and he treasured them both.

“Has no one ever realized what it is, and the kind of training you’ve had?”

Bitterness choked him as he thought back to his stints in various asylums over the years. Like Pip, they’d assumed the tattoo was done as a joke or a way for Darling to attract men, and had mocked him for it.

Because of the embarrassing scars and bruises he went out of his way to conceal, no one else had ever seen his bare back.

Not even Maris.

He swallowed before he told her something he probably should keep to himself. “You’re the only woman I’ve ever been with, Z.”

Zarya froze as she heard those words. Was that even possible?

“What?”

“I was always too afraid of being outed either as a heterosexual or a member of the Sentella to take the chance. It was why it took me so long to touch you, even though I wanted you from the first time I saw you.”

Her head swam as she thought back to the early days of their relationship. Even though she’d craved him from the moment he’d first saved her, she’d had no idea that he found her even remotely attractive. Kere had started out as a liaison from the Sentella and he’d turned into an ally who helped them fight against Arturo’s tyranny.

Yes, he’d spent a lot of time with her, but she’d foolishly assumed it was for Resistance or Sentella business.

Until they’d been on the run from Caronese soldiers. To keep from hurting the soldiers, they’d hidden in a tight closet where there had been no room for them to even breathe. As she was forced to press tight to his body, she’d felt him swelling against her hip.

Neither had moved for countless minutes, but she could tell by his rigidness how much he desired her.

When the coast was clear, she’d swallowed hard, unsure of what to do.

“Sorry,” he’d whispered to her. “I—um… I hope I didn’t offend you.”

It was the first uncertainty she’d ever heard in his voice. “You didn’t offend me, Kere. I feel the same way about you.”

Without a word, he’d opened the door and checked to make sure it was safe to leave.

They had made their way out of the closet and back to the hangar bay where his fighter had been docked. After they launched and once they were sure no one was trailing them, she’d turned around in her seat to face him.

With a boldness she’d never had before with any man, she’d reached down to undo his pants.

“Zarya—”

“Sh,” she’d breathed, cutting off his protest. “I don’t expect anything from you, Kere. I more than understand why you can’t let anyone know who you are—that you have to stay in the shadows. I accept and respect that. But after everything you’ve done for me and the Resistance, I just want to give something back to you. I really do want to do this for you.”

She’d waited for him to protest again.

When he didn’t, she’d opened his pants and stroked him until her fingertips were wet from his desire. There in the darkness of space, he’d cupped her face with his gloved hand.

Already in love with him, she’d leaned down and taken him into her mouth to taste him for the first time. She could still hear his heavy breathing as he’d leaned back in the seat and let her lick and suck on him to her heart’s content.

Hear his expelled breath when he’d cli**xed a few minutes later.

It stunned her to find out now that he’d never been with any woman except her.

She rested her chin on his chest to stare into his incredibly blue eyes. “Given how skilled you’ve always been in bed, I would have never guessed that I was your first.”

“That’s because I spend a lot of time thinking about what I want to do to you.”

She smiled as she remembered all the little things he’d done over the years that had made him such an important, vital part of her life. “Thank you, by the way.”

“For what?” he asked with a scowl.

“I assume you’re the reason my sister called me earlier.”

He stroked her hair tenderly. “I figured you’d want to talk to her. I know how close you two are and I’m sorry I didn’t get you in touch with her sooner.”

She should probably hold that against him, but for some reason she didn’t. “I also assume you’re… whatever that group is that’s sponsoring her scholarship?”

“DIG.”

“Yes, that was it.”

He shook his head. “It’s actually the company owned by Syn and his wife. They do all kinds of charitable deeds under it.”

Now she was confused. “So are they the ones funding her?”

“No, they just loaned their company name to me so that I could do it without her knowing.”

She would never fully understand him. But then he’d always been a contradiction. “Why did you do that?”

“I was afraid if she knew a Cruel or the Sentella was financing her degree, she’d refuse to take the money.”

Sorche would have. Zarya had raised her better than to take charity from anyone. “I still don’t understand why you would do something so kind for her when you hate me.”

He shrugged. “No one should work that hard and not be able to go because of something as trivial as money. I know how much it meant to her and I wanted her to have it. She deserves it after all she’s done to get in.”

“You’ve made her very happy. Thank you.” Zarya laid her head on his thigh as she watched him. He was such a contradiction. He hated her, but he protected her. He’d sold her, and yet paid for her sister to have her dream.

Nothing about him made sense.

He could be so frustrating.

But as they lay in the silence, one thing became clear to her. He wasn’t his uncle. She’d spent her entire life trying to bring down his family, but the real villain was dead.

Darling would be as good for their empire as his father had been.

Better if the truth was known.

As Maris had said, above all, Darling was always fair. He hadn’t punished Sorche for Zarya’s actions. He hadn’t even lashed out at Zarya herself. Not really.

And as a member of the Sentella, he’d been a hero for the working class even though he’d been born to one of the oldest and richest families in existence.

But how could she convince people like Senna and Clarion that he was a different man? Most people hated without cause. Without reason. It was irrational jealousy, and if she knew anything about people like that, it was that they couldn’t be reasoned with.

Their hatred was blind, and all consuming.

Even if Darling did something good, they would twist it to make it seem evil or wrong or self-serving.

Words wouldn’t convince them. Only actions would. And she’d have to move fast to keep the Resistance from building up again and coming after him, night and day. Since she wasn’t there to lead it, she didn’t know who was left. But someone would come forward. They always did. And Senna had told her that she was documenting Darling’s “crimes.” Which meant the Resistance was still there. Still plotting the downfall of the House of Cruel.

Fear for Darling consumed her. How could she protect him from his own people?

And that irony wasn’t lost on her. Here she was, the former leader of the Resistance that had done its best to destroy the Cruel line and all its members, and all she wanted to do was ensure his safety. That he had a long reign.

Her father was most likely rolling in his grave.

But as she traced Darling’s scars, she made a silent vow. No one would ever again hurt him on her watch. Even if he never loved her again, she would die to protect him.

And as that thought finished, a bad feeling came over her. It was just like the one she’d gotten right before her father had died. The one she’d had that last night she’d spent with Kere.

Something evil was coming for them, and it was going to be out for their blood.

11

Four days later

Her thoughts drifting, Zarya idly brushed her hand through the tangles of Darling’s auburn hair. Not long after daybreak, he’d finally fallen asleep with his body between her legs and his head on her stomach. She was exhausted too, but she’d promised him that she wouldn’t sleep while he did.

He was so paranoid about attacks…

Not that she blamed him given his family and personal history—what she’d learned from Maris during a small break yesterday was that Arturo would often have someone storm into Darling’s room at odd hours of the night or early morning to make sure he was alone in his bed. Sometimes they’d allow him to go back to sleep, and others…

They’d cuff his hands behind his back and drag him out of his room for his uncle to beat while in the throes of a drunken rage. Arturo had taken issue with not only Darling’s confessed homosexuality, but also because he looked, moved, and sounded like his father, whom Arturo had always hated. And then there was the small matter that both Darling and his younger brother were a constant reminder that Drux had been able to father sons while Arturo had only daughters.

Something Arturo took out on those daughters as well as his wife—as if it were somehow their fault and not his.

To protect them, Darling had done his best to keep his uncle’s anger directed at him as much as possible. He’d go out of his way to provoke his uncle so that his cousins would be left alone. And true to his nature Darling had considered it a moral imperative to make the man spin out of control as often as possible. He’d admitted to her that he’d been hoping to cause Arturo to have a stroke from the stress of dealing with him.

Only Darling would think of that…

But his incendiary actions had kept Arturo in a perpetual state of fury where Darling was concerned. And Arturo had made it his life’s ambition to take everything out on the nephew who didn’t dare physically retaliate for fear of what would happen to his family if he did.

Because of that, Darling didn’t like to sleep at all. And it was why he’d been wearing explosives on her arrival. Before Maris had brought her here, Darling had walked the palace halls, wrapped in them, refusing to rest until utter exhaustion forced him to it. Since his own guards had been the ones who’d thrown him to his uncle, and had done their own share of abuse to him over the years, he didn’t trust them to protect him now that he was governor.

It disgusted her whenever she thought about it, and the one thing she truly didn’t understand was why Darling had ever fought for the Resistance. Yes, his uncle was a bastard who needed to be put down, but Darling had been attacked even more viciously by the working class such as his guards who resented his royal blood, and who enjoyed having power over an aristo. She really couldn’t understand why he’d want to help them. If any aristo had ever possessed a reason to absolutely hate the pleb class, it was Darling.

Yet he didn’t.

“Some people need a reason to hate in order to live. It’s easy to despise someone you think has it better than you. Or who has more than you, especially when you think they don’t deserve it and you do. But at the end of the day, life sucks for us all. You do what you have to to get through it.

“Personally, I’d rather they hate me for who I am, rather than for the lies spewed by others. But either way, I can’t change their opinions. And I refuse to be like them and to hate them for something they can’t help any more than I can help being born a prince.

“The hatred has to stop somewhere. I’m not going to let resentment for someone else, especially someone I don’t know who has never harmed me, ruin what little time I have in this existence. I’d much rather focus on trying to be happy, than looking for a reason to be miserable.”

Darling’s words haunted her. He really did have a beautiful soul even as battered as it was.

But he couldn’t change the world alone and she knew it as well as he did. Still, it didn’t stop him from trying, and that was what made him so special.

While he would risk his own life to save a complete stranger, Darling trusted very few.

Yet even with their less than perfect past, he trusted her to watch over him while he slept. Something Maris had assured her was nothing short of a miracle.

That being said, she was positively starving this morning. She’d call for food, but since she didn’t want to disturb Darling while he slept so soundly, here she lay, her stomach grumbling so loud, she was surprised it didn’t wake him.

It was okay though. She really didn’t mind. Hunger had been a part of her life for as long as she could remember. It was why she forgot to eat and why Darling nagged her about it. There wasn’t a lot of money to be made as a Resistance fighter and since her father had been an outlaw, he’d been relegated to menial jobs that didn’t require a background check or any form of government reporting. Unfortunately, those jobs didn’t pay enough for a family of five.

Anytime they’d start to piece together savings, either someone got terribly sick or they died and wiped out whatever they’d managed to put away, and then some.

And since she’d been forced to leave school before graduation, she’d been relegated to the same kinds of jobs as her father. It was why she’d been so adamant that Sorche stay in school and finish. She didn’t want her baby sister living a life this hard.

At times, she was bitter about it. Before Arturo had turned on her father, they’d been extremely wealthy. And it was why she’d wanted Arturo’s head so badly. Vengeance was an ugly thing and she’d wanted to ram her family crest down the bastard’s throat.

Now that he was gone, she didn’t know what would become of her. While Darling had been kind over the last few days, she hated being dependent on him. It wasn’t in her nature to rely on anyone for anything. And Darling had already thrown her away twice. What would keep him from selling her off the next time she did something that displeased him?

Yeah, that stuck in her craw. No longer his fiancée, no longer the leader of the Resistance, she wasn’t sure what her current role was.

Part of her still wanted to run away and start over. But her heart wouldn’t let her leave Darling while he was like this. Other than Maris, he had no one in this world who seemed to care about him. No one to watch his back.

No one to hold him while he slept, and unless he was wrapped around her or on her like now, he woke up all throughout the night in a panic and cold sweat, his eyes feral and his breathing ragged as he looked around for an attacker. But as soon as he saw her in his bed, he’d calm down and relax again. So how could she abandon him to his pain?

He never told her what those dreams were about. He didn’t need to. In his sleep, he mumbled the names of those who’d hurt him the worst. Arturo’s was the most common. But Ryn, Clarion, Pip, and Timmon were there, too. Along with other names she didn’t recognize.

And if any of them were still alive, she hoped she never met them. If she did, she’d kill them without hesitation. Whatever they’d done to him had been horrific enough to torture him even when they were in a place where they could no longer reach him.