Carnal Secrets (The Phoenix Pack #3)(15)
Author: Suzanne Wright

Shaya was about to question how the hell someone who liked solitude could have acted as an Alpha when she caught sight of something in the side mirror. “Is that Derren in the SUV behind us?”

Nick sighed tiredly. “Yes.” He’d noticed his “bodyguard” minutes earlier.

Turning in her seat, she regarded him through accusatory eyes. “Aha. You said you’d left the pack.”

“I have.”

“If that was true, you wouldn’t still have a bodyguard,” she pointed out impatiently. “Which means you’ve only been telling me all this to fool me into mating with you.”

“Sorry, Nancy Drew, but you’re wrong on that one. I’ve been trying to get rid of Derren for years.”

“Why would he stick around to protect you if you’re not Alpha?”

“It was never anything to do with me being Alpha. It’s a personal thing.”

“Really?” she drawled, skeptical. “And what is this personal thing?”

He’d rather not say, would rather not tell her about that period of his life in case it scared her off. “You know, you didn’t answer me last night when I asked you if there was a guy in your life.”

Thrown off-balance by the complete change of subject, she was silent for a moment. Instead of answering, she hit his question with one of her own. “Is there a female in your life?”

Nick would have insisted on hearing her answer first, but it killed him to see the distrust in her eyes. “There hasn’t been anyone since I first saw you.”

She snorted and turned her head away. “Yeah, right.”

He tugged on her hair, demanding her full attention. “I wouldn’t betray you like that.”

She spluttered. “But we aren’t mated.”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“You chose to forsake me.”

“No, I chose to put your safety above everything else. It didn’t change the fact that the only person I wanted was you.”

If that was true, he was going to be seriously pissed off by her answer, and then she’d be stuck in a car with a raging, too-damn-dominant alpha male wolf. That was never a good situation, and her wolf wasn’t looking forward to it. When he raised a questioning brow at her, she averted her gaze as she admitted, “I dated a couple of times.” She braced herself for an explosion. There wasn’t one. Risking a glance at him, she saw him looking calm and cool. Only his white-knuckled grip on the steering wheel betrayed his inner turmoil. “Why aren’t you yelling?”

“How can I?” His words were like crushed rock. “All you were doing was trying to get on with your life.”

And now she felt bad. She shouldn’t. She knew that. If he’d yelled at her, she could have rightly pointed out that if he hadn’t wanted her to date anyone else, he should have claimed her. But although he was undoubtedly angry, he’d turned that anger inward, had directed it at himself, and was taking responsibility for what he’d done. Dammit. She wanted to stay pissed at him, and he was making it hard.

As he smoothly pulled up outside the salon, Shaya glanced at him to find that he still wasn’t looking at her. “I never slept with any of them.” No, she hadn’t owed him that detail, but he could so easily get to her. It wasn’t just because he was her mate, either. It was his eyes…those pools of dusky green had dark shadows there—scarred by a pain that no person would ever want to feel. Any female with a heart would want to reach out and take that away, not intensify it. She was hurt, but she wasn’t bitter and twisted and didn’t relish the idea of making anyone’s pain worse.

Fighting to keep his touch gentle when anger was overwhelming him and putting a sour taste in his mouth, Nick briefly breezed his thumb across her cheekbone. “Thank you for telling me that.”

“I can’t forgive you for abandoning me.”

“I wouldn’t expect you to.”

“Then why come here? Why do this?”

He swallowed hard, squeezing her thigh gently. “Because I’m determined to earn a second chance.”

“And if you don’t get it?” She tensed as a lopsided, mischievous smile surfaced on his face. It promised bad-boy stuff.

He leaned toward her slightly. “What you don’t understand about me, Shay, is that when I really want something, I’ll do whatever it takes to make it mine. Like it or not, you already belong to me; I intend to make sure that’s not something you want to fight anymore.”

Her wolf liked that. Liked his determination. Liked the idea of being the sole focus of his attention. Liked the idea of the chase. To her utter dismay, a part of Shaya kind of liked it too, but anger and betrayal overshadowed that. Besides, she couldn’t trust anything he said or did.

Resisting the urge to kiss her, he moved back. “Go on, or you’ll be late. I’ll pick you up after work.”

“I’m perfectly capable of getting myself home,” she snapped indignantly.

“Of course you are. I’ll be here waiting when you get out.” He smiled when she growled before getting out of the car. Once she was inside the salon, Nick drove farther down the street and parked outside the diner. He hadn’t been sitting inside a booth for more than thirty seconds when Derren came strolling in. As he approached, grinning, Nick shook his head. “I distinctly recall firing you. Again.”

“I’m trying not to be offended.” He slid onto the seat opposite Nick. “She let you give her a ride to work. Progress.”

“Yeah. This is going to happen in baby steps.”

“How does your wolf feel about that?”

“The wait’s killing him, but he understands that she’s hurting. Like me, he wants her to come to him in her own time.”

Derren gave a satisfied nod. “Your mom has called me three times in the past twelve hours to ask how you’re doing and if your mate has accepted you yet. It would really help if you could answer your cell phone so she’s not using me as a go-between.”

“Why would I do that? If you’re going to linger like a bad smell, you can make yourself useful.”

Derren laughed. At that moment the waitress appeared, and they both ordered coffees and breakfast. “Your mom found Roni, by the way.”

“Good.” When Nick’s sister was in her wolf form, she would often disappear for weeks at a time. Sadly, Roni spent most of her time as a wolf—she had done so since the incident that led to him serving time in juvie. Although his sister was strong enough to cope with anything life threw at her, it seemed that that one thing would always torment her. It was understandable.