Carnal Secrets (The Phoenix Pack #3)(59)
Author: Suzanne Wright

Cautiously, Shaya made her way over to where Roni lay. Sitting beside her, she smiled. “Hi there.” The wolf didn’t react other than to briefly glance her way. “Guilt’s a funny thing, isn’t it? It lingers, even when it doesn’t make sense to feel it. I was a twin, you know. She died in the womb. I know it’s not my fault, and I know I couldn’t have helped her and that for me to survive when she didn’t isn’t an awful thing. But I hated myself for a long time. Even now, I know I shouldn’t feel guilty. Mostly, it’s gone…but a tiny bit still stays. Whenever the guilt and the sadness got too bad, I’d stay in my wolf form for days on end. Because though the guilt’s still there, it’s dimmed when you’re in that form, isn’t it? Staying as a wolf…it was my escape. And it’s yours too.” She had Roni’s full attention now.

“I know that really I have no reason at all to feel guilty. None of it was my fault…just like what happened that day in the woods wasn’t your fault. Nick doesn’t realize you shift to escape the guilt. He thinks you stay in this form a lot because you’re escaping the memories of what happened, that he traumatized you. Maybe if you guys talked…maybe you could help each other out with the unnecessary guilt you both feel.” Giving Roni one last stroke, Shaya got to her feet. “See you soon.”

Entering the house, Shaya found that Amber was doing her best to lounge over Nick, and Taryn was therefore throwing peanuts at her. Of course Amber’s attention quickly switched to Taryn, ridding Shaya of the need to march over there and make it clear that Nick was hers. Shaya observed with a frown as Nick dodged Kathy’s touch in the same way that he dodged Amber’s; his mother didn’t appear surprised or offended by how uncomfortable he seemed with her attempts at affection. It occurred to Shaya then that Nick wasn’t just like that with Amber, or even just with Kathy. He didn’t seem to like being touched in general, which was pretty odd—as odd as him disliking company, in fact.

“He’s always been like that, according to Kathy.”

Derren’s voice snatched her from her contemplations. “What?”

“He’s never been particularly affected by social touching. Kathy said that even when he was a baby, he didn’t like to be cuddled much or rocked to sleep or anything—he always liked his space, liked to sprawl on the bed like a starfish. Even now, he hugs Roni and Kathy, but that’s pretty much it. It’s only you I’ve ever seen him be truly affectionate with.”

“In other words, I don’t need to worry about Amber. Does everyone buy her sweet friendly-friendly act? I see a lot of deviousness there.”

“Yup, a lot of people buy it.” He sighed. “She’s very cunning. A word of warning: She’ll try her hardest to become a close friend, but you can’t let her get friendly with you—not even to humor her. If you do, you’ll make it possible for the communication between you and Nick to become triangular with her as the go-between. I’m sure you know as well as I do that if that happened, she’d be passing on messages to both of you that would be twisted or false.”

“Ah, and then it would make Nick and I upset with each other, and we’d both turn to her for advice, enabling her to interfere in a big way.” Sneaky. So sneaky it was almost worthy of respect. “That won’t happen. You’re on my side, right?” She had the feeling that Derren was a good person to have on her side.

“Are you planning to hurt Nick again?”

“No.”

“Then yes, I’m on your side.” As Roni butted his leg, Derren reached down and petted her. “And you’ll have Roni on your side, too. She can see right through Amber’s act. Unfortunately, Kathy can’t, but she wants Nick to have his mate—and that’s you.”

“I guess all I can do is ignore her. If that fails, I have rat poison and a shovel.” As Nick then came over and locked his arms around her, Shaya smiled and sank into his arms. Over his shoulder, she noticed that Amber was watching her from the far side of the room. The female shot her a friendly smile, but Shaya hadn’t missed the anger that had momentarily sparkled in her eyes. Still, Shaya returned the smile while at the same time tightening her hold on Nick, conveying a clear message that he was hers. That wasn’t enough for her wolf; she wanted Shaya to bite him. So Shaya did, right on his pectoral.

Nick winced, peering down at his mate, who was grinning in self-satisfaction. “Did you just bite me, baby?”

“Yep.”

The possessive glint in her eyes made him smile. Leaning down, he bit Shaya’s bottom lip hard and then licked across it to soothe the sting. “You’re never going to get away from me, you know. You’re mine. I’m keeping you. For good.” He’d expected her to snort at him or maybe look wary, but she surprised him by relaxing slightly in his arms. His wolf growled in contentment, convinced that his mate was coming around to the idea of being claimed. But Nick often found himself wondering if it was something she would ever be ready for.

CHAPTER TWELVE

Shaya had always been good at defusing situations and calming tempers, which was ironic considering her own temper was pretty bad. However, defusing any arguments that occurred between Taryn and Amber took a great deal of effort—something Shaya had quickly come to learn over the last four weeks. As such, she was tapping her foot impatiently while she stood between the two females in the living area who ranted at each other, pointing fingers and scowling. Meeting her mate’s gaze, who was sitting on the sofa looking both amused and exasperated, Shaya struggled not to laugh at the insults being exchanged.

Amber had done exactly as Derren had said she would—she’d tried extremely hard to become close friends with Shaya. But when that hadn’t worked, she had instead taken to trying to provoke Shaya with sugar-coated insults and backhanded compliments that had been so cleverly delivered they sounded totally innocent to most people. Taryn, however, knew exactly what Amber was doing. Whereas Shaya’s response to Amber had been to act sickly sweet rather than snap—which would have made her seem unnecessarily bitchy and hostile toward Amber—Taryn was much too direct to cope with her shit. And now the bitch had done what she knew would piss Taryn the hell off: She’d touched her mate.

Amber threw her hands up in the air. “All I did was touch him with my fingertip—I was trying to heal the cut on his hand!”