Dark Lycan (Dark #24)(60)
Author: Christine Feehan

"Thank you for coming, Fenris Dalka," Mikhail said. "May your heart stay strong, hunter," he added in the language of the ancients, a more traditional Carpathian greeting. He turned to Dimitri and repeated the formal welcoming. He took Tatijana’s hands in his. "Thank you for the aid you gave to our warriors, Tatijana. You definitely turned the tide of the battle in our favor."

He stepped back and paced away from them, his quick energy flowing rather than nervous. When he turned back, his dark eyes seemed to look right through Fen. "You have indeed brought us an interesting problem."

Fen looked around the great chamber. "You did not call a council of warriors as I expected."

Mikhail nodded. "I gave this great thought. The only ones among us who actually witnessed the fight between you and the one you call Sange rau are here in this chamber. I thought it was important to know more about what we’re actually dealing with. There are many questions that have come to mind."

"May I ask why we are having this conversation here in this sacred place rather than the convenience of a house?" Tatijana asked.

Gregori turned his piercing stare on her.

Her chin went up, Tatijana refusing to be intimidated. Fen could have told him her Dragonseeker blood didn’t seem to allow her to be overawed by anyone, not even her own lifemate.

Fen could have told her why. Mikhail Dubrinsky was no one’s fool. He’d thought long and hard over the problem of the Sange rau. He had witnessed up close what a mixed blood was capable of. By now he would have gone over all the pros and cons, just as the Lycan council had so many centuries earlier. Nothing had really changed down through the centuries. The solutions were every bit as bad as the problem itself and Mikhail no doubt had come to that conclusion, just as Fen had.

"She asks a fair question, Gregori," Mikhail said, his tone mild. "The truth is, Tatijana, I’m disturbed by the abilities of the Sange rau. They present a real threat to not only our species, but to the Lycans and humans as well. One way to put it is that they have the nuclear weapon and we don’t."

"That’s what Fen said," Tatijana acknowledged.

"The immediate solution seems obvious," Mikhail said. "And certainly it was proposed that many of our most skilled hunters become the Sange rau in order to better destroy the ones who have turned vampire."

Fen tried not to react. He could feel not only the stare of the prince and the others, but also the weight of the warriors long past. Everything in him rebelled against the idea the prince was suggesting. He had known all along that this would be one of the proposals. If every warrior went out and became the Sange rau, their skill as fighters should give them an advantage when fighting those who had turned vampire-but it didn’t work quite like that.

"One does not become Sange rau in one step. The wolf comes to you to protect you. You are not both together and it takes some time before you merge with your wolf. I was living with the Lycan on and off and I think it may have happened faster than normal, but it took time. In that time you’re going to lose a lot more warriors to the other side. They will choose to be vampire much faster with their blood mixed."

Fen shook his head, disturbed that he might sound like he didn’t want anyone else to be like him. It was a fine line he walked, giving what he felt was pertinent information and not sounding arrogant.

Mikhail seemed to recognize his reluctance. "You do not have to hide what you feel from us," the prince said. "We’ve asked you here to help us find a viable solution to this problem-and it is a problem. A complex one, the more I study it. I looked at it from every angle and something occurred to me. There is great power in my family, but it comes with a terrible price. I think there has to be a balance, and with the gifts given to us, there is always a price to pay, so I had to ask myself, what is the price of being a Sange rau? Only you can answer that question for us, Fen."

Fen felt the ancient warriors waiting for his answer. The air grew heavier as silence descended in the chamber. A few of the great columns vibrated, darker colors swirling through the stone giving the illusion that the chamber itself was alive.

He sighed. He had come here knowing that Mikhail would be intelligent enough to ask the right questions. He’d seen it in him. They all had to know the truth-especially Tatijana and Dimitri.

"The price is far too high, Mikhail," Fen answered honestly. "Especially for a warrior without a lifemate, but even those of us who have a lifemate are not necessarily as safe as our Carpathian counterparts. At first, yes, the wolf helps. You can see as a wolf does, the colors are dull, but better than nothing. But as time passes, the pull of darkness grows until it crouches like a monster above you and whispers continually."

He didn’t look at his lifemate or his brother. He looked around the great chamber at the vibrating columns-ancient brethren who had lived their lives honorably-no matter the difficulty.

"I think every Carpathian who lives a long time and battles the vampire successfully, comes to a place where he believes in himself. He has to. He has to have absolute confidence in himself. Confidence can lead to arrogance. Carpathian males lose emotion and in some ways it is both a blessing and a curse. To feel, when you destroy old friends and family, to live year after year in darkness, is pure hell. To be Sange rau is to fight feelings of arrogance and superiority every rising, lifemate or no. I believe that if you give into these feelings, even with a lifemate, you can become vampire/wolf. Obviously I haven’t tested this theory."

Again there was a silence. He could feel Tatijana’s horror rising. You understand now my reluctance to bind you to me. There was shame in knowing he hadn’t disclosed the worst of his fears to her before claiming her for his own.

Again, Tatijana surprised him. Soft melodic laughter filled his mind. I do not feel horror at your admission, my love, only at your belief that you would ever succumb to the darker impulses of our kind.

We do not know that. There is no way of telling what I would do in a moment of madness. You saw into my mind when I fought with the werewolf to get information from him and again, when I was battling Abel and Bardolf. I believed myself superior even to them. Fen made the confession to her reluctantly.

Silly wolf man.

He was shaken by the love in her voice. She could bring him to his knees so easily.

We have spent most of our time in battle or in the ground healing since you claimed me. How can you possibly know how having a lifemate will affect the feelings of superiority? I can assure you, my love, that Dragonseeker women are superior and therefore, you won’t have a leg to stand on.