Dark Secrets (Dark Secrets #1)(111)
Author: A.M. Hudson

“I suppose.” I reached out and brushed my chin with his thumb. “After all, we did find each other against all odds.”

“Right. And I wouldn’t be here—alive—if you hadn’t come along.”

“Really? So you think you would’ve acted on those, what did you call them—fleeting thoughts?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know.”

“You scare me, Ara-Rose.” He grabbed my shoulder and spun me back into him, forcing me to hold my breath under his bear grip. “What’s going to happen to you when I leave?”

I didn’t answer; I didn’t feel it needed an answer. And I wasn’t sure I had one to give, anyway.

The silence hovered over us for a while then as the dark blue horizon turned almost pale white and the sweet smell of morning dew mixed with the perfumed air from the dying summer rose. David and I both took a long breath.

“Are you okay, David?” I asked, sensing a shift in his spirit.

“Every day I wake,” he started hesitantly, “And I tell myself that I’ll let you go; that it’s the right thing to do. And then you say things like that to me—tell me that you’re not sure about living—and I wonder if I should just convince you to come with me; if I should just wish for you to suddenly lose your desire to live life, wish for you to throw your arms around me and beg me to change you.

“And then I look at you and I see you for the sweet, young, human girl, who has never lived a day in her life, and I just can’t do it—I just can’t take your life from you. I have to bite my tongue every time I’m about to say something that would convince you.” He pressed his face firmly against mine for a second, breathing me in. “I’m just a guy, Ara. I’m not perfect. In fact, I’m more perfectly imperfect than a human. I have this evil side in me that is screaming for me to steal you. It’s only the angel on my shoulder that makes me wish a better life for you.”

“I know, and sometimes I wish you’d just force me to do it, too. But I’d hate you for it. It’s just so dumb.” I slammed my hands down by my sides. “All of it. I wish it were different.”

“Well, you know what they say?”

“Yes. They say a lot of things that don’t really make sense. But which one were you referring to specifically?”

“Wishing is good time wasted.”

“Shut up, David! God, you’re so negative.” I leaned forward to look at him, groaning out loud. “You know, you might not, but I still believe wishes come true.”

“That’s because you’re still a child.”

“Then what does that make you?”

“Ha! A sick-minded hundred-year-old who has a fetish for teenage drama.”

I laughed too, and looked out over the treetops. “There is still magic in the world, Mr Knight. You don’t have to be a child to find it. Even my dad believes in it, and he wasn’t a child when he taught me to believe—taught me how to make wishes.”

“How can you teach someone to make wishes?”

“There’s a special way to do it.”

“There is?”

“Yes.”

“Will you teach me?”

I smiled and cleared my throat as I turned to look at David, noticing the tiny silver reflections of stars in his eyes. “Well, when you see the first star of the evening or the last star in the early morning, close your eyes, cross your heart and make a wish. If you keep it secret, then it will come true, one day.”

“And you still believe that?”

“Yes. I do. And no one is going to take that away from me with borrowed philosophy about life.” I took a breath of the cool, dawn air. “When you find that one of your seconds has been wasted on a wish, and you think you could’ve really used that second—really need it back—then I’ll agree it’s wasted time wishing. But not yet.” I looked back to the sky. “Not while I still have hope.”

“My only hope is that you see sense—realise that being a vampire isn’t so bad, and let me bite you—to change you.” David sighed, closing his eyes and crossing his heart.

“And there’s that evil side,” I noted with a smile.

“Yes. But I will never stop wishing for it, Ara. I know that’s wrong, but I can’t control my heart’s desires.”

“As long as you control your teeth, then I’m fine with that.”

“But you asked me to drink your blood—what if I lose control?” he said playfully.

“I’m not having this argument with you. I don’t want to be a vampire. I just want to be with you. Nothing more.”

“Okay. No more talking about it.” He kissed the top of my head and held me to his chest. “When you’ve decided you can’t live without me anymore, then we’ll talk about it.”

“But I already decided that.”

“Okay, well, when you decide you don’t want to be a frail old lady and die, then we can talk about it.”

“Not gonna happen.” I laughed.

David breathed out softly. “You know, I’ve never met a girl so eager to die in all my life.”

I shook my head and folded my arms across my chest. “No, David, I’m not eager to die—I’m eager to live.” And for the first time since I lost Mum and Harry, that was finally true. Love had given me a reason to exist, and now, even without love, I wanted a life. We could remain in the bliss of summer romance until winter showed, and I wouldn’t think about the choice I had to make; I just wanted to pretend it wasn’t there, because, when the time came to make my decision, he knew, and I knew, we’d be saying goodbye. I could only hope some miracle would come along to save me from the choice of losing the one I love, or killing to be with him.

Chapter Twenty-One

“Wake up. Wake up.” Vicki slapped my bedcovers. “Time to go.”

I groaned, shielding my eyes as she threw my curtains apart, blinding me with the white glow of morning. “Vicki. It’s Saturday.”

“Yes. I know.” She opened my window, and the fresh scent of cut grass and rain blew in with the light breeze. “Good to see you’ve finally started sleeping with this closed.”

“I didn’t. Dad must have closed it.” Or David. I tried to remember last night, but could only half remember falling asleep against my vampire’s chest, which, instead of bringing a rise of anger for him closing my window, brought only a dreamy sensation all through my limbs.