Dark Secrets (Dark Secrets #1)(202)
Author: A.M. Hudson

I curled my fingers into a tight fist, on the cusp of losing my battle for alone time by shoving his hand away, when everything around us seemed to stop.

“Where did this come from?” he whispered to himself, lifting the silver chain from under my shirt. “Oh, Ara—” he sighed my name out, his warm, heavy breath brushing across my nose and lips. But, he placed the locket gently back down on my chest, instead of ripping it away, like he probably should have, and kissed my head, closing the bedroom door behind him.

The sunlight outside reflected off the icy roads and shone through the window with its early morning glow. It felt like years since I’d seen the sun, since I’d looked up at the blue sky and found the summer.

I wondered now if I’d ever love the summer again.

“Hi, gorgeous.” Mike glided into my room with breakfast. “You hungry?”

I shook my head.

“Okay.” He lowered the plate of toast, his smile dropping with it. “I’ll take it back down.”

“Thanks, Mike. But…” I sat up a little. “Don’t tell Vicki. She’s worried I’m not getting enough nutrients.”

“Right.” He paused, chewing the inside of his lip as he studied my half-dried tears. “Ara?”

“Mm?”

“No more, baby.” He squatted beside me, placing the plate on the ground. “You gotta talk to me.”

“I do talk to you.” I folded my arms.

“No, you don’t. You haven’t even been able to look at me. You flinch when—” he dropped his hand away from my face as I recoiled, “—when I touch you.”

“Well, what do you expect, Mike?”

“I get it. I do. But I don’t understand why you’re pushing me away. I’d never hurt you, Ara.”

“That’s not what I’m afraid of,” I said with a hint of detest.

“Well—” He dropped back on his heels a little. “What is it then?”

I stared at him through a film of tears, and as the words of truth rose to the surface, at the same time the tears spilled onto my cheeks, I spat them out, “I’m just so ashamed. I never wanted you to find me that way.”

“What way? Ara, how do you think I found you?

“He—he,” I stammered. “He said he was going to make sure that when you found me, you wouldn’t sleep for fifty years.”

Mike’s eyes widened; his hands shot out so fast that I squealed and ducked my head, but he sat on my bed and held me to his chest anyway, stroking my hair. “You never told me that. Why didn’t you tell me that?”

“I didn’t want anyone to know.”

“Well, did you tell the cops that?”

I shook my head. “I haven’t told anyone—anything. I only told them the basics.”

“Then, you remember more than you say?” His tone was soft, not angry like I expected.

“Mm-hm.”

“Oh, baby. Why? Why would you do that? How can they catch this guy if they don’t know the full story?”

“They’ll never catch him.” That much I was sure of.

Mike ignored that comment and took a deep breath. “Do you want to know what I saw when I found you—can you cope with this yet?”

“I need to know, Mike. It’s been eating me up.”

“Oh, Ara. You should’ve talked to me about this before now. I could’ve helped you.”

“I thought you wouldn’t wanna talk about it.”

“That’s just silly, baby.” Mike laid me back down on the pillow and his hand fell gently into the curve of my neck as he studied me, swiping his thumb over my cheekbone.

“Mike?” I grabbed his wrist and pushed it down. “Please don’t touch my neck.”

“Right, sorry, I forgot.” But his eyes stayed there for a moment, not on the jagged, silvery bite shape, but on the place the attacker’s grip left a mental scar. “You were covered when I found you.”

I looked up quickly into his soulful, caramel gaze. “I was?”

He nodded, half smiling. “Your hair was laying over your…over your chest, like it’d been positioned that way. No one saw anything, and I had you covered with my jacket before anyone else came.”

Tears of relief overflowed and swerved down my cheeks. Mike started to wipe them away, but gave up in vain when they kept flowing.

“You’re so silly, Ara. All this time, you thought I found you—exposed.”

“I did.” I wiped my nose. “I thought—I mean, I didn’t know what he did to me after I—when it all went black. I didn’t know if maybe he’d done…worse, or—”

“Oh, baby. I really wish you’d said something.”

I felt pretty silly then. “So do I.”

Mike laughed softly, but the smile in his eyes faded away to something darker.

“What, Mike? What is it?”

He pinched his lips, rocking his jaw. “You don’t know what I went through—looking for you. And when I found you—” He let a breath out through his nose, battling with words inside his mouth. “I expected, given what I was sure he’d done to you, I was surprised when I found you still wearing your underwear.”

I cringed.

“But your legs—” He looked haunted, lost in disgust. “You were just so…so covered in blood. I thought the deranged prick had actually dressed you again after he…” Mike couldn’t say it.

I touched his arm, wishing I could have been there to comfort him through that.

“I cried when they told me,” he said, cupping his hand over mine. “When the doctors said you were untouched, I just cried. Baby, it was so dark in that field. Without a torch, I might not’ve seen you at all. And when I found you, I noticed only one small flicker of pale skin, and I ran, faster than I’ve ever run before.”

In my mind, I could see it all as it happened.

“All we’d come across so far was—” he paused and lowered his voice, “—was your bra. And I can’t tell you what went through my mind when I found it.”

I felt my cheeks flush.

“Oh God, baby, the things I imagined he was doing to you while I wasn’t there to protect you. I felt so helpless. I couldn’t walk properly; every step I took was like my legs were carrying the weight of a train. But I kept going, just to find you—to hold you and make you safe again.

“If you could only feel what I felt when I saw you there. I wasn’t ashamed or disgusted, like you seem to think, princess. I was overjoyed. And I promise you, no one saw your body—except for Emily; she was right beside me the whole time.” When he looked back unexpectedly, I nearly jumped out of my skin; Mike’s eyes became soft and round. “I covered you with my jacket,” he continued, “and checked every square inch of your body to make sure I wouldn’t break you more if I moved you, and I know you didn’t want me to see you like that, but I never looked at anything in that way. I was just so happy to find you still breathing. All I saw was the girl I’m in love with—and the only memory I’ve taken with me from that night is the way you looked up suddenly, so scared, and then smiled when you saw me.” He squeezed my hand. “You closed your eyes then, and I thought that was last time I’d ever see the blue again.”