Echoes of Scotland Street (On Dublin Street #5)(67)
Author: Samantha Young

She rolled her eyes at me again. “You did that to yourself. You pick these losers. These big nothings—”

I shot toward her so fast she stumbled back in fright. “Don’t you ever call him that,” I hissed, fists clenched at my sides.

“Shannon,” Cole murmured, but I ignored the placation in his tone.

“You don’t know anything about him or me. Why?” I pleaded. “Why are you being like this? I’m trying to fix things because Logan wants his family back, and you’re playing your petty games.”

“I’m not playing. This is serious. This doesn’t look like trying to me.”

I shook my head, feeling immensely sad all of a sudden. “You said you love me, but I’m not sure I believe that. You and me . . . we’ve never gotten along and I still don’t know why you’ve always had it out for me—”

“Oh, for God’s sake! If only you’d been this paranoid about your boyfriends, maybe Logan wouldn’t be in prison.”

I felt Cole’s heat at my back and I pressed a hand out behind me to stop him from saying or doing anything in retaliation. “Cole does not need to prove himself to you or to anyone. Now, you’ve insulted him enough. I want you to leave.”

Face red, eyes suddenly filled with a surprising amount of emotion, Amanda whispered, “I don’t know what you think or why you think it, but I do care about you. I just don’t trust you and I’m trying to save you from making another huge mistake. I’ll never forget what you did to Logan, but I was willing to try to forgive. Please, Shannon. You let me walk out that door, then you’re cut off from this family.”

As I was almost paralyzed by her words, it was only the touch of Cole’s hands on my hips that reached me. Fear of disappointing Logan again kept me from saying anything.

Amanda took my silence as rejection and with wounded eyes and a disapproving grimace she hurried out of the studio before I could figure out how to make it all work.

CHAPTER 24

I felt sick.

Logan wanted one thing from me, one thing, and I’d already mucked it up.

I spent the next few hours trying to push past my emotions and think rationally. I needed to come up with some way of making this situation work out for everyone.

I just didn’t know how.

“Are you going to speak ever again?” Cole said.

He sat across from me at Rae’s kitchen table. Rae was out. After having heard the commotion at work, she’d decided we probably wouldn’t be great company that night. Why she couldn’t just say she was giving us some space, I didn’t know, but that was Rae’s way. You would think being thoughtful was something to be ashamed of the way she tried so hard to hide her considerate side.

“I’m sorry.” I pushed my plate of egg noodles and red Thai chicken away. “I just keep thinking things over and over and I still don’t know what to do.” I bit my lip and then suggested softly, “Perhaps we should take a step back.”

Cole froze for a second before his fork clattered to his plate. “Excuse me?”

I continued thinking out loud. “Just until I breach the distance with my parents. You know . . . ease myself back into the fold, show them I’m trying, and then when they see that, you and I can pick up speed again and they’ll see for themselves what a good guy you are.”

The air in the room turned arctic. I knew immediately I’d made a huge error in judgment by thinking out loud. Anger, incredulity . . . and hurt blazed in Cole’s eyes as he shoved back from the table to tower over it and me. His voice was almost a whisper, it was so choked with emotion. “After everything, after the way they’ve treated you, neglected you, you want to put us on hold to appease them?”

I slid back from my chair, desperately trying to think of a way to calm the situation, to articulate this correctly, because clearly I was messing it up. “No! I mean, just temporarily.”

Wrong thing to say! My eyes widened as his whole being seemed to expand with anger. “You cannot be serious?” he said.

“Cole, please. Try to see it from my perspective. This is my family. And yes, they’re not a great one, but they’re still my family. They’re hurt and scared and I’ve been running from them, it all, for too long. It’s time to fix things. It’s what Logan wants and what I think I need.” I took a step toward him, placation in my eyes. He flinched back from me. I was royally screwing this explanation up. “Cole . . . you of all people have to understand. Your mum was a crap mum, but you never abandoned her. Not completely.”

A muscle flexed in his jaw as he nodded with teeth gritted. Finally he expelled his breath in a hoarse voice. “But I would never have chosen her over you.”

“I’m not choosing anyone over—”

“I can’t do this right now.” He held up a hand to interrupt me. “I need to walk out of here before I say shit I’ll regret.”

Wondering how the conversation could have taken such a bad turn, I pleaded with him. “Don’t. I’m not trying to hurt you. I’m just trying to think of—”

“Not trying to hurt me?” He pushed the chair he’d been sitting in hard against the table. It was my turn to flinch back. “You’re asking me to fucking prove myself. If anyone has to prove themselves it’s them!”

I pressed my lips closed, realizing with a heaviness in my gut that that was exactly what I’d just asked him to do. After telling my family that I would never do that to him, I’d done it without thinking. “I didn’t mean that,” I promised. “I really didn’t. I just don’t know what else to do.”

But my apology didn’t even penetrate his anger. He leaned forward, eyes narrowed, and hissed, “Here’s a hint: You should never have said you wanted to take a break. You should never have asked me to prove myself after all the shit you’ve put me through.” He cut me another disgusted look and strode out of the room while I recovered from his furious attack.

Hearing the front door open, I snapped out of my stupor and raced down the hallway. “Cole!”

He spun around. “And to think I was going to ask you to move in with me. What a huge fucking mistake that would have been.”

Oh heck, this was not happening. “Cole, please—”

The door slammed shut on my face.

I stumbled forward, about to chase after him, when his words started ringing in my ears. He was furious. My continued attempts to rectify the situation weren’t going to change how he felt at the moment.