Endless Magic
“Kiran's right, Eden,” Lucan intervened, amused by his son's assertion. “Handcuffs or not, if you even breathe in disagreement, I will make you personally choose which prisoner will die first.” Lucan silenced me, but I possessed no more will to fight against him. He turned to his son, “Kiran, she belongs to you; keep her under control.”
Lucan leveled his son's gaze, silently commanding that Kiran carry the burden of reining me in. I expected him to protest, or even simply accept his father's order, but the look of pain that crossed his face made my stomach jump in fear. I wanted to run from the room, not for the first time during this exhausting interchange, but this time because of Kiran, not his father, or even the stipulations to my prison sentence. My throat tightened and my palms started sweating, locked in the heavy silver bracelets that weighed my magic down and reminded me that Kiran's hate for me infiltrated his magic so thickly that the thought of dealing with me was painful for him. I shuddered involuntarily and Kiran turned his eyes on me, the painful expression replaced with the one that I simply didn't understand.
Lucan snapped his fingers and the Guard followed from the messy study. “You have a week to figure out how to love each other again,” Lucan called, stern and serious.
My shoulders fell and my chest heaved in the breathlessness of panic. Prickles of heat stabbed the underside of my skin and the room lost focus. I acutely remembered what it felt like to be in love with Kiran, how I looked at him with utter adoration, how my stomach fluttered with every one of his touches, how his mouth passionately pressed against mine to take all of my soul in a shared breath. But those feelings were gone. My eyes were opened, my stomach sick with the memories of his betrayal and my lips dry and lonely, a side effect of neglected captivity.
I crossed my arms in the middle of the damaged study, and stomped my foot, a defiant gesture directed at my own stubbornness. Lives hung in the balance, the fate of others rested in my ability to perform, in my talent to disguise my true feelings and turn them into a charming act. Lucan wanted the kingdom to believe Kiran scorned Seraphina for a second time because of me, that we were madly in love, that the future of the kingdom was solidified in our two perfect magics coming together in a kind of perverse treaty. If Mrs. Woodsen were here, she would be so very worried for the future of the Immortal race, knowing it was left in my shaky and incapable hands. She would have remembered how I stumbled through prose and poems and how my acting skills were less effortless and more.... terribly awkward.
From the silence in the room, the thick tension that stifled my breathing and set the hairs on the back of my neck straight I understood I was not the only person afraid of my ability to mislead. Hiding my feelings was, in reality, something I had never been capable of before.
I hoped the memory of walking through the oppressive prison would be enough to start a fire inside of me strong enough to be confused with unquestioning love. I turned to Kiran, hoping for encouragement, but he was wearing that look again, the one that turned his deep blue eyes all too intense, the one that set his mouth in a straight, hard line so devoid of his trademark smirk that a ripple of fear worked slowly from the bottom of my hairline to the base of my spine.
“We are going to need to practice,” I stated simply. I wasn't the only one that needed to work at fake affection.
“I suppose you're right,” Kiran sighed, sounding exhausted. He ran his hand through his tussled hair, the tell-tale sign he was frustrated with me.
I determined in that moment that no matter what happened during our engagement party, no matter how much I hated Kiran or his family, I would not be the reason someone died. I would play my part perfectly and without hesitation until Kiran himself believed I was in love with him. I would continue to play Lucan's game until the moment was right, until the opportunity arrived to kill him. Or Kiran. Whichever came first.
Chapter Six
Are you Ok? Avalon opened our shared consciousness and I breathed with relief.
The morning had been a whirl-wind in Lucan's office and between reclaiming my magic from Avalon and then having it stifled again from the handcuffs, I entirely spaced out the open communication I shared with my twin brother.
Yes.... No.... I don't know anymore, Avalon. At least no one is going to die today. I sunk heavily into one of Kiran's leather chairs and turned myself toward the picture window. The sun glistened brightly over the greenery and tumbling mountainside, its rays like long fingers shimmering through the glass pane and onto Kiran's wood floor. I trailed my toe across the warm sunlight and sighed wistfully at the idea of stepping outside this castle and tipping my chin into its magnanimous warmth.
And for that, we are grateful. What's your plan here Ede? What do you want us to do? Avalon tensed with concern for me. I recognized the feeling, the despairing hopelessness and consuming anxiety. I remembered what freedom felt like while my twin was captured, held prisoner, tortured....
I don't want you to worry. I felt Avalon inwardly reject the idea, as if I suggested something ludicrous. I'm serious Avalon, it's not like it was when you were in here. I'm safe. I am well taken care of, and other than having to pretend I'm madly in love with the prince, I have nothing to worry about.
The prince? Avalon could not stifle his laughter at the reference and sarcasm he usually used to apply to Kiran's title. I felt his satisfaction that it was now the term that I utilized, but even still I knew he would never refer to Kiran with that much disrespect again. I could feel his friendship with Kiran, his loyalty; I could feel how much he felt he owed Kiran deep down in his bones and it confused me. Why didn't he remember that Kiran was the one who got us into this mess? Ok, seriously, what is your plan?
I'm going to go along with all of this. I'm going to play their game. If they want me in love with Kiran, I'll be in love with Kiran. If they want me to sing and dance, I'll sing and dance. I don't know what is going to be asked of me Avalon, but I'm done fighting a battle of the wills with Lucan. I'm not going to give that tyrant a reason to murder an innocent. And in the meantime I'm just going to trust that you and the Resistance will find a way to kill him before May first. I was sincere and straightforward with Avalon. There was no more reason to waver or think things over, I knew my role now. I chose this martyrdom. And I knew to my core, how much Avalon agreed with me.
What's May first? Avalon asked, but I felt his confidence in the matter of assassinating a king.
“Eden, are you listening?” Kiran interrupted my internal conversation and I turned to face him along with Sebastian and Talbott who had fallen silent next to him. I gave him a perplexed smile and he asked again, “Are you all right with accompanying me this afternoon?”
At the same time, Avalon repeated his question rather impatiently, Eden, what's May first?
All three boys stood staring at me with a mixture of amusement and confusion plastered on their faces. I stood up, and smoothed out my black t-shirt, trying to hide my embarrassment.
“I can talk to Avalon again,” I confessed, clearing my throat and bravely lifting my eyes to theirs.
“We assumed,” Kiran grumbled, his hard blue eyes narrowing. “Did you hear anything we discussed?”
“No,” I growled. I cracked my neck and then straightened my posture. Pretending to love him might be a harder task than I wanted to believe.
Kiran sighed irritably, and then raked his hand roughly through his hair, “I asked-”
“Remember, you're in love!” Sebastian piped up, giving both Kiran and me an admonishing glance.
“Right.... Eden, I was wondering if you would accompany me today while I visited some sick Guards around the Citadel?” Kiran's voice tightened with the strained effort of sounding chivalrous, I could feel it in the waves of tension emanating from his stiff body how violently he did not want me to go with him. I smiled at the chance to irritate him, but more so at the opportunity to leave the castle during the day. Exploring the Citadel on a gorgeous summer day like today sounded perfect, even if it was with Kiran.
“I would love to!” I squeaked. I bounded over to him and kissed him on the cheek before he could react and then turned toward the bathroom. “I just have to take a quick shower,” I called before slamming the door and breathing deeply. Once the door was closed, I noticed that the handcuffs hardly had any effect on me. I wondered if it had anything to do with the open flow of magic between Avalon and me, or if it was just the excitement for the prospect of getting out of Kiran's bedroom. Either way, I jumped into the shower, hardly caring at all that I would be spending the day with him.
----
“Should I hold your hand?” I whispered to Kiran as we walked through the empty castle hallways.
“Although, I appreciate you taking this seriously, I don't think it's important for you to pretend to be so in love until guests actually start arriving,” Kiran said with an air of irritated dignity.
“Oh, I mean, I know. I just need practice. I'm not very good at hiding my real feelings,” I admitted. Kiran's indifference and coolness threw me off and I felt the continual need to defend myself as if he were constantly accusing me of ruining his life.
And then I wondered if that was exactly what he was doing. But was his animosity for me because I wouldn't fall willingly into his arms after my grandfather was murdered in front of me and my brother sat waiting for execution, or because he thought he had an actual chance of happiness with Seraphina, and when I interrupted his wedding day, I also interrupted his future wedded bliss?
“I am fully aware,” Kiran mumbled, holding the heavy wooden door to the outside open for me.
I breathed in deeply, stepping outside into the sunlight that instantly warmed my face. The stifling heat pulled prickles of sweat out of my skin and tightened my breathing for the few moments it took me to get used to the roasting summer air. I closed my eyes and lifted my face toward the sun. In a moment I would use magic to regulate my body temperature and stay comfortable. But I missed the sun. I missed the fresh air and so for this moment, I would stand human against the elements and relish the power of a hot summer day.
Eventually I opened my eyes, squinting them when the sunlight was too bright to cope with. I expected Kiran to sigh impatiently, or say something biting, but he stood there quietly staring at me, his expression softened and his eyes turquoise, deeply turquoise.
“I'm sorry,” I offered, not at all apologetic, “there was a while there that I never thought I would get to feel the sun again.” I smiled bashfully, for some reason confessing my fear felt like sharing something personal with Kiran.
“You should cover your mark,” Kiran ignored my confession and gestured at my neck. “The Titans we are going to see are on their death beds already; you shouldn't startle them with magical tattoos.”
“I didn't realize it was scary.” I admitted, pulling my still damp hair over my shoulder and securing it in place with a hair-tie I kept around my wrist.
“It's off-putting,” Kiran replied bluntly, turning on his heel and walking with purpose across the courtyard in front of the castle.