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Fatal Justice

Sam waited outside the Internal Affairs hearing room. They were running late, which had sent her stomach into a spiral. She focused on breathing: in through the nose, out through the mouth. It wouldn't have been so bad if she knew she'd done nothing wrong and could chalk this up to a witch hunt by Stahl.

But that wasn't the case.

She had screwed up by getting involved with Nick during the O'Connor investigation. He'd found the body, which made him a material witness. She should've stayed as far away from him as she could get until the case was closed. That he had been instrumental to her successfully closing the case might not matter to the board.

Though she had participated in many IAB hearings during her career, she'd never been the subject of one, even after the fiasco with the Johnson case. An internal investigation had cleared her of any wrongdoing in the death of young Quentin Johnson in the crack house shooting, but the department psychologist had recommended a thirty-day administrative leave. The penalty this time could be much stiffer.

Deputy Chief Conklin, Sam's delegate to the three-person panel, came out to get her. "Lieutenant? We're ready for you."

"Oh. Okay."

Inside the room, Conklin joined Stahl and Captain Andrews from the bomb squad at the head table. The three of them would determine her fate. Chief Farnsworth and Captain Malone were also in attendance. A stenographer was set to record the proceedings.

"Before we begin," said Stahl, who was clearly enjoying this. "I'd like to once again protest the appointment of Deputy Chief Conklin to this panel. He maintains a close personal relationship with the lieutenant's father, and his participation here is a conflict of interest."

"As I've told you before, Lieutenant," Conklin said, "find me anyone in this department – besides yourself of course – who doesn't hold retired Deputy Chief Holland in the highest regard. Per the officer bill of rights, Lieutenant Holland can choose anyone she wishes to act as her delegate to this panel. You're wasting everyone's time with this protest."

"I agree," Andrews said. "Let's move on."

Stahl levied a hateful stare in Sam's direction. "Very well, Lieutenant Holland, raise your right hand." He swore her in and gestured for her to be seated. "You've waived your right to representation?"

"I have." She saw no need to suck someone else off real police work when she was more than capable of defending herself.

"And you're aware of why you're here today?"

"You believe I exercised poor judgment in becoming romantically involved with Nicholas Cappuano during the O'Connor investigation."

Stahl stared at her. Clearly, he hadn't expected her to be so forthcoming. "That's correct," he stammered.

Sam noticed that Captain Malone had a hand over his mouth as if trying to hide a smile.

Stahl cleared his throat. "And to that you say?"

"I can't deny that I become close to Mr. Cappuano during the investigation, or that he was enormously helpful to me and Detective Cruz as we worked to close that case," Sam said, thrilled to realize she was ruffling Stahl.

"Did you know Mr. Cappuano before the O'Connor investigation?"

Ignoring the grind in her stomach, Sam said, "Yes."

"Please elaborate."

"We met six years ago at a party. We spent one night together and didn't see each other again until Senator O'Connor was found murdered."

"And why did you never see him again?"

"A series of misunderstandings."

"Did you disclose this prior relationship with the witness to your superior officers?"

"I did not."

"Why not?"

"It wasn't relevant. It was one night six years ago."

"Did it occur to you at the time that your failure to disclose the relationship might endanger the investigation?"

"No."

"At no time did you think, maybe I ought to tell someone that I know this guy? That I slept with this guy?"

"As I said, since the relationship spanned one night six years earlier, I didn't see how it was relevant to the investigation. Mr. Cappuano was a tremendous asset and saved us a lot of time we would've wasted figuring out who the players were."

"When did you clear Mr. Cappuano of any possible culpability in the senator's murder?"

"Right away. He had an airtight alibi, no motive and his heartbreak over the loss of his friend and boss was genuine. At no time was he a suspect."

"Even after you learned that he was the beneficiary of a two million dollar life insurance policy left by Senator O'Connor?"

"Mr. Cappuano was never a suspect."

"At what point during the investigation did your relationship with Mr. Cappuano become personal again?"

"The first night."

Stahl's eyes lit up with glee.

Sam worked to keep her tone calm and even. "He called me when he realized someone had been in his house."

"So the first night of the O'Connor investigation, you went to Mr. Cappuano's home?"

"That's correct."

"Located where?"

"At that time it was in Arlington, Virginia."

"Which is well outside your jurisdiction."

"I had given him my card with instructions to call if he thought of anything that might help the investigation. When he arrived home and discovered disarray, he did as I asked by calling me. After I got to his house and confirmed that someone had entered the home, I called Arlington police."

"And your relationship took a personal turn that night?"

"I waited with him while Arlington investigated. During that time, he provided more background on the O'Connor family relationships. After the police left, we discussed our personal relationship, which he wished to resume. I told him it would have to wait until the investigation concluded."

"Did it?"

A sharp pain in her stomach stole her breath. This is where things got dicey. "Despite my intentions, the relationship later became serious."

"Did you disclose that to your superiors?"

"I did not. It still had no bearing on the investigation."

"How did your relationship with Mr. Cappuano become public?"

"When my ex-husband planted crude bombs on both our cars. The bomb on my car exploded, injuring both Mr. Cappuano and myself."

"This occurred where?"

"In front of Mr. Cappuano's Arlington home."

"You were there for what reason?"

Sam swallowed the ball of panic forming in her throat. "I had spent the night there."

"How many days into the O'Connor investigation was this?"

"Three."

"That didn't take long."

"Can the editorializing, Lieutenant Stahl," Conklin said.

With a smarmy smile, Stahl said, "Lieutenant Holland, did your superiors confront you about the relationship after the bombing?"

"I discussed it with both Captain Malone and Chief Farnsworth, both of whom accepted my explanation of how the relationship transpired and how helpful Mr. Cappuano had been to the investigation."

"What is your relationship today with Mr. Cappuano?"

" Cappuano and I are in a committed relationship as you and everyone in Washington knows."

"Do you think the very public nature of your relationship with the senator could be seen as a detriment to your duties as a police officer?"

"In a perfect world, the media would have no interest in us. Unfortunately, I don't live in that world."

"Do either of you have any questions?" Stahl asked Conklin and Andrews. Both declined. "In light of Lieutenant Holland's testimony and her inappropriate relationship with a material witness, I recommend two weeks unpaid suspension and reduction in rank to detective."

Sam suppressed a gasp. Two ranks! That couldn't happen. But she refused to give Stahl the satisfaction of an emotional outburst.

"The panel will consider the recommendation in executive session," Conklin said. "Lieutenant Holland, we appreciate your candor. You'll be informed of our decision."

"Thank you, Deputy Chief Conklin. If I may, I'd like to say one more thing – obviously, I don't wish to lose my current rank, but I want you to know that if I had the O'Connor investigation to do over again, I wouldn't change a single thing. That's all."

She got up and left the room. It was out of her hands.

Nick and Christina returned to his office after a marathon meeting of the Senate Homeland Security and Governmental Affairs Committee. Once they had gone over their notes and made a to-do list, she got up to leave.

"Thanks again for going with me earlier," he said. "And yesterday, too."

"Lots of drama lately."

"Yes."

She looked at him as if there was something else she wanted to say but had thought better of it.

"What's on your mind, Chris?" She studied him for a long moment. "Are you going to, you know, go running out of here every time something happens with her?"

"I don't know," he said, caught off guard by the question. "Maybe. Do you have a problem with that?"

"No, it's just that you might not always be able to. You have so many commitments and obligations now. It's different than before."

"I'm well aware that my role has changed. We're just going through a period of transition. On multiple fronts." He paused before he added, "I know you've had a lot on your plate doing two jobs over the last month, but Terry will be starting soon. It should get better then."

"I guess we'll see how that works out. You have a nice evening, Senator."

"You, too."

For a long time after she left, he sat and stared at the painting of the Capitol that Sam had given him for Christmas. He thought about what Christina had said and acknowledged that she made a good point. It wouldn't always be possible for him to go running when Sam was in trouble – not that she expected him to. But he couldn't imagine sitting through a committee meeting, for instance, if he knew someone was holding her hostage.

They were definitely navigating uncharted waters here, and everyone was going to have to make some adjustments. He finally had time to pick up that day's Washington Post, which had devoted much of the front page to Julian's murder. At least they had taken a break from reporting about his romance with Sam. As Nick read the coverage about Julian, he was once again filled with sadness over the loss of his friend.

Suddenly, he remembered an op-ed piece that had run the week before in which Tony Sanducci, a leading abortion protestor, had spouted off about Julian's nomination and the setback it could represent to the rights of the unborn. He had urged his followers to take any steps necessary to stop the nomination. Nick wondered if Sam had thought to talk to Sanducci. Nick reached for the phone to call her, but got voicemail.

"Hey, babe, it's me. Listen, I was thinking you ought to check out an editorial that ran in the  a week or so ago. Tony Sanducci went off about Julian. Might be a good lead. I'll send a link to your e-mail. I'll be home in an hour or so. Maybe we can take another shower or something." The memory of their earlier shower made him smile. "Love you."

Sam emerged from the hearing and went straight to the restroom. The pain in her stomach bent her in half. In a cold sweat, she closed the stall door and rested against it, fighting for every breath.

She'd meant it when she told the board she wouldn't change a thing about the O'Connor investigation. Nick was, without a doubt, the best thing to ever happen to her. How could she regret falling in love with him? How could she regret the magic his love had brought to her life? But to be busted down to detective, just as she achieved her longtime goal of making lieutenant…

"God," she whispered, the enormity of it almost too much to bear.

She took another ten minutes to pull herself together. Determined to get out of there on time for once, she returned to the detectives' pit where a crowd waited for her.

Gonzo pounced first. "Lieutenant, how did it go?"

"Are you all right?" Jeannie asked.

"Stahl's an asshole," Arnold chimed in. "This is all about you getting his command."

Sam held up her hand to stop them. "I appreciate the support, Arnold, but this is about me hooking up with a witness during a homicide investigation. While Lieutenant Stahl may have ulterior motives, he's entirely within his rights to call for an IAB inquiry."

"It's so ," Gonzo said, his face tight with dismay. "The senator was instrumental in you closing O'Connor as fast as you did. That should count for something."

"We'll see if it does," Sam said, resigned now to whatever fate awaited her. "In the meantime, where are we with Sinclair?"

"I'm digging around in Diandra's background like we discussed," Jeannie said. "I should have a report for you in a couple of hours."

"We aren't authorized any O.T. on this one," Sam reminded her.

"I'll do it on my own time," Jeannie said.

Sam sent her a grateful smile, knowing Jeannie had been moved by Nick's devastation after hearing about Sinclair. The brotherhood – or in this case sisterhood – among her fellow officers had always been Sam's favorite part of the job. Luckily, there were a lot more like Jeannie and Gonzo and Cruz than there were like Stahl.

"I'm going to head home," Sam said. "Shoot your report to my email. I'll be working later."

"Will do, Lieutenant," Jeannie said. "Try not to worry too much. Conklin and Andrews know you're a great cop and a gifted detective. It's going to be fine. I'm sure of it."

"It'd better be," Gonzo added.

"Watch your blood pressure, Gonzo," Sam said, amused by his anger on her behalf. "I appreciate the support, you guys. Let's not allow it to be too much of a distraction. If you need me I'll be on the radio or call my cell."

She left them talking about the injustice of the IAB hearing. Their overwhelming support helped to boost her spirits. On the drive home, she listened to the voicemail from Nick and decided to stop at the store so she could surprise him with a home-cooked meal. After she stashed the makings for linguine and clam sauce in his refrigerator, she went over to check on her dad.

"Anyone home?" she called.

"In here," Skip replied from the kitchen. "Is that my wayward daughter who used to live here?"

"Very funny." Sam bent to kiss his cheek. "I still live here."

"I've been wondering why that is when you've gotten a much better offer from the handsome guy down the street."

"I'm thinking about the handsome guy's better offer."

"Are you now?"

She shrugged. "It is a pretty good offer. And he does have a Jacuzzi."

"You're so easy," Skip said, laughing. "I hope you're not holding out because of me. I'm in good hands with Celia. There's no need for you to be here if you'd rather be somewhere else."

"I'm just trying to take it slow," Sam said. "I don't want to rush into anything."

"Understandable. After all, if you were to rush in, you might end up on the front page of the  every other day, and that would kind of suck."

"You're very funny tonight, Skippy." Sam reached for a soda in the fridge. "What's the occasion?"

"You gonna tell me about it?"

She paused in the midst of opening the bottle. "What?"

He shot her a "you know" look.

Swallowing hard, she said, "How did you hear about it?"

"The question is, why didn't I hear about it from you?"

"I've been in major denial mode."

"What did Stahl recommend?"

"Two weeks unpaid suspension, reduction to detective."

Skip winced. "No way Conklin will let that happen."

"Nothing I can do about it now. I was straight up with them in the hearing, told them exactly how it went down."

"That's the best strategy, which I would've told you if you hadn't kept me in the dark – again. Becoming kind of a disturbing pattern between us."

The comment went straight to her heart because he was right. They'd always been in sync with each other, and she hadn't been holding up her end of the deal lately.

"If you treat me like an invalid, that's how I feel, Sam. I don't want you thinking you have to protect me from this crap. It doesn't get much more crappy than living like this."

"I'm sorry." She dropped into one of the kitchen chairs. "I don't mean to keep stuff from you. I was hoping this was gonna go away before it got this far."

"Should've known better with Stahl involved."

"I know."

"Did you tell Nick?"

Sam looked up at him with a rueful expression.

"Sam! Are you  You've got IAB poking into your relationship with him and you don't think he needs to know that?"

"He's been so down about John and now Julian and wound up about what happened to Cruz. And then the whole mess with Reese today. I was afraid it might be one thing too many, you know?"

"You're playing with fire, baby girl. That man is one to be reckoned with. If you think he's going to put up with you keeping things from him, you're deluding yourself."

Sam knew he was right. "I'll tell him tonight. It'll be fine." She got up and kissed him. "I've got to go. I'm making dinner."

"You? "

"You really ought to consider a career in stand-up comedy – without the stand-up part of course."

"Now who's being funny? Let me know the minute you hear."

"I will. Try not to worry too much. Whatever happens, Nick was worth it."

"That's a good way to look at it."

"It's the  way to look at it. I'll see you in the morning."

After she packed a bag of clothes for the next day, she walked back over to Nick's, thinking about what her father had said. At this point, Nick would probably be furious that she'd waited so long to tell him about the IAB hearing. She'd have to see how the evening unfolded to determine if there'd be a good time to tell him. In the meantime, after dinner she would look into Sanducci.

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