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Fearless In Love

Ari had the uncharitable thought that the gesture was just like the Wicked Witch. But Irene wasn’t really wicked. She was just…careless and thoughtless. After spending less than sixty minutes with her, it was obvious that having fun was more important to her than actually raising a child.

Ari’s mother had had nothing and Irene had everything, but still Ari saw the similarities: Fun was the most important thing to Irene, just as the next fix had been more important to Ari’s mom than keeping food in the fridge or taking care of her kids.

“It’s so much better for Noah this way, don’t you think?” Irene looked at Ari as if she expected her to actually agree that leaving her child was a good thing.

“Mommy, come help me.”

Noah already knew how to build the blocks on his own. He had his father’s inventive spirit, and he could follow the instructions. But he obviously wanted his mother’s attention.

And Irene was good at giving a few moments of bright and cheerful attention, even if she was as terrible at being a full-time mother as she said. She lay on her stomach on the floor beside him, propped her elbows, and began sorting through bits and pieces, reading instructions, and making Noah the center of her world. He soaked up all that love, laughing, playing, enjoying.

“We went to the zoo last week,” Noah told her, recounting all the animals they’d seen in Oakland.

“That sounds like such fun.” The tiny frown creasing Irene’s forehead made Ari think she was a little jealous that her son had had fun with someone else. “In fact, let’s go to the zoo in San Francisco this afternoon just as soon as we’re done building your new castle. They have the most marvelous gorillas there. Ari, could you please arrange that for us?”

Ari nodded, texting Doreen to ask her to please have the car ready in the next hour or so for a trip to the San Francisco Zoo. Noah and his mother talked about everything Noah had done with Ari in the past week, and Irene made plans for all the things they would do not only this afternoon at the zoo, but also the next time she visited, which she assured him would be in a couple of weeks.

Matt should have told her Noah’s mother stopped by every two weeks. Warned her, anyway. But maybe if Irene was a little jealous of the fun things Noah had done with Ari, she might come around more often.

In any case, Ari knew she needed to stop judging Irene. Yes, there were some obvious lapses in her judgment. And she could be a bit condescending with “the help,” as Ari and Cookie so clearly were to her. But at the same time, she was very sweet with Noah, listening to his chatter as though it had the potential to rearrange mountains or bring world peace, while she handed him pieces and praised him for the absolutely amazing, fantabulous job he was doing. Ari’s heart lit up seeing the glow on Noah’s face, the joy brimming in his eyes and bubbling over in his voice.

A cell phone rang from deep within Irene’s ginormous, expensive leather purse. “Can you toss me my phone?”

After witnessing Noah’s joy, Ari barely even resented being cast as Irene’s personal assistant. She rummaged down into the expensive bag, searching for the phone’s lighted dial and the source of the old Blondie song Call Me, then handed it over to Irene.

“Angela, honey, talk to me. It’s been ages.” Propped on her elbows, the phone to her ear, Irene crossed her legs at the ankles, swinging them back and forth, flashing the red soles of her shiny black high heels while Noah plugged away at the giant’s castle. Some of his glimmer died as he lost her focused attention.

“Yes, I’m in California, so of course you should count me in. I wouldn’t miss it for the world!” Irene flipped her wrist to look at her watch. “I have to pack and shower and make myself gorgeous, but I can do it.” She listened, nodding. “Send your driver. I have no desire to manage the drive to SFO on my own. You’re a doll. Smooches.” Hanging up, she flopped over on the carpet, then rolled into a cross-legged position. “You are not going to believe this.” She waited until she had both Ari’s and Noah’s complete attention. “Angela got an invite to a private fashion extravaganza with three of the top designers. In Paris. This will be epic.” She clapped her hands. “We’re taking her daddy’s personal jet.” She patted Noah’s cheek. “I have to run, sweetie. But we’ll do all those fun things we talked about when I get back. Promise.” She leaned in, offering him her cheek. “Give Mommy a smooch.”

“But I want you to see the castle.” His lower lip trembled, and Ari saw tears glimmering. “And we were going to the zoo.”

“Oh honey-bunny, I wish I could, but I’ve got to pack and shower. So many things to do before Paris.” As if she’d only just noticed her son’s impending tears, she cupped his chin. “I’d take you with me, but you know your daddy would hate that.”

Ari’s hackles rose like a mama bear protecting her young. Irene had given Noah exactly an hour and a half. Ninety minutes of love and attention before the timer dinged. But getting into a battle in front of Noah would make things worse.

Irene rolled to her feet, smoothed her designer outfit, then held out her hand to Noah. “Walk me to my car so you can give your mommy a big good-bye kiss.”

Ari could see how much self-control it took the five-year-old boy to blink back his tears before he scrambled to his feet and took his mother’s hand. Outside, Irene hauled him up in her arms and covered his face with more kisses, while Noah threw his arms around her neck, hugging tightly as though he’d never let go.

After less than sixty seconds—Ari couldn’t help but count silently in her head—Irene pried him off. “Run to your nanny. She’ll help you finish building your toy.”

He stood staring at his mother for a long moment before finally trudging back to Ari’s side. For the first time, he didn’t reach for her hand, and when she bent down to take his, it was limp.

Irene climbed into the car, blowing kisses. “I’ll be back soon. We’ll do the zoo. Promise. Love you. ’Bye!”

Ari remembered the trampoline too late, and before she could remind Irene to have the store pick it up, Matt’s ex was gone with a squeal of tires as the sporty red car roared through the front gates, like a hurricane blowing through and leaving its wreckage behind.

“It’s not too late,” she told Noah. “We still have time for that picnic Cookie was going to make us.”

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