Feral Sins (The Phoenix Pack #1)(77)
Author: Suzanne Wright

Trey groaned. The woman never let up.

Unable to resist needling her, Taryn said, “You know, Greta, you and I will get on a whole lot better once you accept that I’m a goddess.”

At that moment Marcus entered and, obviously having heard her comment, bowed to her. “Oh beautiful goddess, how may I serve thee?” Trey slapped him lightly over the head.

“A goddess? Hmph. I gave you my loyalty because I’d never do anything to upset my grandson, but I’ll never see you as my Alpha female.”

“Yeah? Watch me pretend to care.” In actuality, she could demand Greta’s complete submission and even punish her for her disrespect, but Taryn wasn’t interested in being one of those Alphas who were so damn strict that they basically prevented the members from having a mind of their own. She didn’t want the loyalty of her pack out of fear, but out of respect.

If a few members weren’t prepared to give her that, then fine, whatever. Besides, she was so used to her relationship with Greta being like this that it would feel kind of weird if it was any different. And it was way too much fun to battle with her.

By the time Taryn had downed her breakfast and morning coffee, Trey had gone to his office as usual to check his e-mails and whatever else he did in there. Taking advantage of his absence, Taryn went outside onto the small clearing and then made her way into the forest, headed for the river. She hadn’t been there since the anniversary of her mom’s birthday and nor had she felt a need to. Until now.

On finally coming to the river she sat on the same bolder as she had on the previous visit, again enjoying the fresh crispy air and the various comforting smells. She wasn’t sure how long she sat there trying to pluck up the courage to speak, to find the right words. Finally she took a deep breath, swallowed hard and straightened her posture.

Hey Joe. God, where do I start? Last time I was pretty miserable, huh. Remember I told you all about how the Alpha I’d mated with was basically ignoring my existence? His name’s Trey – I don’t think I ever told you that. Well things are kind of totally the opposite now.

We’ve, um, well we’ve sort of…We sort of discovered that…It turns out we’re true mates. I bit him yesterday and the bond clicked into place. I feel awful for saying this, but…well I’m happy about it. I’m so sorry if that makes you hate me, but I’d rather not lie to you.

You don’t mean any less to me than you did before. It’s like I said to Shaya – you have your own space inside me, and now so does Trey. And now he’s filling it. And…and I love him. I’d like to think you can be happy for me, that you wouldn’t want me being alone. I know I’d feel that way if the positions were reversed – although I admit I’m petty enough that I’d have been a little jealous. But I wouldn’t have wanted you to be lonely or to never find someone who cared for you. And that’s what I have. Not love, no I’m not sure I’ll ever have that so I’m not even sure our mating bond will ever be fully formed. But I’m actually happy. I hope you can be glad for me.

With tears clouding her vision, she rose and smiled. Love you, miss you.

Although her heart felt as heavy as it usually did after talking to Joey, she wasn’t filled with that old sense of hopelessness or plagued by a feeling of loneliness. Yes she missed Joey, there was no way she couldn’t, but now she knew that it wasn’t because he had been her mate, but because of what close friends they had been. Now she had something good to go to back to, someone who had gotten rid of that emptiness she had once felt. Someone she loved. Her mate.

She had taken approximately ten steps when she realized she was no longer alone. Looking to her right she saw a very familiar whopping big grey wolf. “Hey there, Cujo.” She knew that although the wolf would have picked up on her surface emotions, he wouldn’t quite understand what her pain meant or what she had been doing by the river, but there was a strong possibility that Trey did.

She walked to the wolf and squatted beside him. He rubbed his jaw against hers and licked her ear. “I had to explain to him, Trey,” she said, knowing he would hear her. “And I needed to find that peace. You get it, right?” For a split second the wolf’s eyes flashed Trey’s artic blue, and she knew he was letting her know he had heard. Smiling she shook his muzzle and pushed him away for her. “Fancy a race?” Then she was gone.

She and the wolf played for something like an hour; tagging and chasing each other, wrestling, mock fighting, and ambushing one another. Although he didn’t hold back with those teeth or claws, he didn’t once draw blood. Finally they collapsed near the lake beside Trey’s discarded clothes, panting and huddled together. She hadn’t at all meant to doze off, but it wasn’t a great surprise that she had.

She woke to the telling sound of popping and snapping. Opening her eyes, she saw Trey beside her in his human form once again. His sharp eyes were glinting with a light-heartedness she had never seen there before. His usual scowl had all but disappeared and he wore a beaming smile.

Knowing she was wondering at his uncharacteristic cheeriness, he explained. “I never really made time for playing and fooling around. I became Alpha when I was just a teenager, remember. Had to grow up pretty quickly. There wasn’t really fun or quirkiness in my life until you got here.” He clipped her hair behind her ear and kissed her lightly before sucking her bottom lip into his mouth.

“So you never really went out and had fun with the guys?”

“Not really. There I was suddenly responsible for all these wolves and I wasn’t in a great frame of mind after everything that had happened.” He exhaled heavily. “I wasn’t in control of my emotions. Hell, I didn’t even know what the emotions were. There we were with no territory, no home, no money. I knew I needed to gain control fast or I’d never keep the pack alive.”

“So you bottled it all up,” she said in a whisper. “Turned yourself into a robot.”

“I guess I did. It wasn’t hard to rein it all in. I’d always been good at that.”

It tugged at her heart to know that he had basically missed out on his youth. Teenage years were about personal growth and fun and finding your identity. Trey had missed all that, and that was just unacceptable to Taryn. “Well now that I’m around, you’ll be expected to have fun occasionally – know that right now.”

“We have plenty of fun.” He grinned wickedly and licked over his mark while his hand cupped her breast.