Fool's Quest

“Prince FitzChivalry.” The height of the throne was such that, even seated, Dutiful was looking down at me. I waited. He spoke quietly. “You found Shine Fallstar and brought her home. My mother has taken charge of her. Her restoration to Lord Chade has brought him much comfort and eased his condition. Thank you for that service.”

I bowed my head. “It was part of what I set out to do.”

He replied not to that, but said, “Before you secretly left Buckkeep Castle, the last time we convened to discuss the kidnapping, in Verity’s tower, I asked you if you remembered that I was your king.”

I gave a slow nod.

For a time longer, he sat looking at me. Then he slowly shook his head. “Prince FitzChivalry, I speak to you as your monarch. I called you here today to remind you, again, that I am your king. To remind you also that you are Prince FitzChivalry, and fully in the public eye. I regret that in the midst of our grief, this is what we must discuss. But I dare not let you continue as you’ve begun!” He paused and I saw him strive to retain his composure.

“I repeat what I mentioned yesterday. There is more going on in Buckkeep than our private tragedy. More going on than Lord Chade coming unraveled and you being unpredictable with your Skill. More going on than announcing that Nettle is my cousin, and is married and with child. More than us trying to reconcile Tom Badgerlock and Prince FitzChivalry and dealing with someone trying to kill Lant, and Shine’s stepfather attempting to murder Lord Chade. The Six Duchies and the Mountain Kingdom form a very large gaming board, and there are many pieces in motion, always. Beyond our borders, we have Chalced and the Out Islands, Bingtown and Jamaillia. And we have dragons, and each dragon is like dealing with a separate country, when they are interested in negotiating at all.”

His voice had begun to shake. He paused a moment and I sensed that he fought to get his feelings under control. Yet when he spoke again, it was the hurt that came through more than his displeasure with me.

“Always before, I’ve been able to count on you. To know that you had the best interest of the Six Duchies at heart, and would be honest with me even if it pained me to hear what you had to say. Always I felt I could trust you. At the very least, I knew that you would never do anything to cause me greater difficulties with my reign. I don’t forget what you’ve done for me. How you brought me back from my ill-considered flight to the Old Bloods, and how you accompanied me to free Icefyre and win my queen. I know that you’ve intervened on my behalf with both my mother and with Lord Chade, to assert that I was to be king in truth as well as in name. I hold this throne in part because of your efforts to see me secure upon it.”

He paused. I was looking at the ground between us. He waited until I lifted my eyes to meet his. “FitzChivalry Farseer, why did you take this action on your own? You could have challenged my plan, given me your reasons. I would have listened, as you have listened to me. Why did you not entrust me with your plans?”

I told him the truth. “I knew you would forbid it. And then I would have to disobey you.”

He sat a little straighter on his throne. “You did disobey me. You know that.”

I did. I felt childish as I tempered it with, “Not directly.”

He rolled his eyes. “Oh, please. This does no honor to either of us. Fitz, you have stepped out of the shadows and into the sunlight where everything you do will be scrutinized. Because you are so newly restored to us, even your smallest action is of great interest and fuel for gossip. I am not Chade, able to invent an instant veil of lies to drape whatever you do in respectability.” He drew a breath in my silence. “Report. Leave nothing out. Tell me all you did not share with my mother and your daughter. Report to me as if I were Chade.”

I forgot myself. “How is Chade?”

“Somewhat better. You may go from here to his chamber and see for yourself. Later. Prince FitzChivalry Farseer, I am not reporting to you. Give me an account of all you did since you decided to leave Buckkeep Castle. Spare me nothing.”

I made my decision quickly. Perhaps it was time my king truly knew me. Perhaps his assassins should not conceal the dirty work they did for the throne. And what I was capable of doing for myself. And so I told him, and left out no detail. I spoke of drugging my companions, and how I had taken both carris seed and elfbark. And then I told him in detail of what I had done to the handsome rapist and to “Duke” Ellik.

He did not interrupt my account. His expression remained impassive. When I finished, he was silent for some time. I tried to be unobtrusive as I shifted my weight. He looked down on me. Did he evaluate me and find me wanting? Did he wish he had never drawn me out of the shadows?