Gameboard of the Gods (Age of X #1)(88)
Author: Richelle Mead

Who are they more loyal to? Each other or the RUNA?

The ravens didn’t answer.

“Porfirio didn’t take it very well,” said Val, finally gaining enough control to continue on with the story. “He kind of got out of control. He wanted to prove himself. And he wanted to get away from her. He requested an assignment over in Europe—you know what a mess that is.”

“I do,” said Justin. Europe had never been a consideration for his exile. “What happened to him?”

“He died,” said Val simply. Her and Dag’s faces were grave. “Killed in combat from some explosion. I don’t know the details. I don’t want to know. When word got back, a lot of people—especially his cohort—said what happened was her fault.”

“It wasn’t,” said Dag fiercely. “That was that bastard’s own mistake.”

Val obviously agreed. “But plenty didn’t think so—still don’t. His funeral was three weeks ago, and one of the Indigos picked a fight over it.”

Dag lit up a little. “Finn cleaned the floor with that bitch. It was amazing. Kind of scary too. I mean, like we said, she’s good…but wow. It was unreal.”

“It was real enough to our superiors,” said Val dryly. “Drunken fights at parties are one thing. Disorderly conduct at a military funeral is completely different. She spent some time in confinement and then got officially reprimanded. They stripped her of her uniform and—”

“Wait,” Justin interrupted. “What’s that mean?”

“It means she can’t wear a prætorian’s uniform until the ban is lifted. If she has to go in military wear, it’s got to be gray and maroon.” Val’s eyes were troubled, filled with sympathy for her friend. “It’s a pretty big deal.”

A uniform didn’t sound like a big deal, but every cue from Val and Dag said it was. After a little consideration, Justin could understand it. The prætorians were very, very self-satisfied, confident in their power and position. The uniforms were a symbol of that. They were part of the public’s image of them: deadly, black-clad warriors. The greatest in the Republic. Being denied that had to be like losing a part of oneself, and with a pang, he suddenly realized why Mae had been so hostile when he’d suggested she dress up to meet Dennis.

“She also got cut from both active duty and ceremonial duty.” Val allowed a dramatic pause as the story finally neared its end. “She got assigned to you.”

“And that’s why I’m a punishment,” he concluded. They nodded, and Justin made no attempt to conceal his feelings.

“Don’t take it personally,” said Dag, almost kindly. “Your life’s kind of exciting.”

“But it could be a lot better,” said Justin.

A long pause followed, and then Dag repeated, “Don’t take it personally.”

Justin managed to summon his customary smile—though it was harder than usual tonight—and act as though he was taking this all in stride and had enjoyed their lively story. He tried to think of a topic that wasn’t his being a punishment.

“I’m kind of surprised she was openly involved with someone who wasn’t Nordic,” he said. An outside castal was considered the same as a plebeian. “I figured she would’ve been put in some well-arranged marriage.”

“Her?” Val’s earlier levity returned. “Hell, I don’t think she’s ever dated a Nordic guy. At least not as long as I’ve known her.”

“But she’s still got Nordic citizenship. Seems like she’d want to stay on good terms.”

“Apparently not as much as she wants to sleep with dark-haired guys,” said Dag. “And as long as she’s not married or knocked up, she can flaunt a guy she really likes as much as she wants.”

A couple of things about that bothered Justin. One was that Mae had lied about her inability to be with someone like him. The other was the subtle assumption that she hadn’t “flaunted” him because he wasn’t a guy she really liked. She was still off-limits, but that old sting to his pride remained.

He finished his current glass and offered them more, but a check of the time made the prætorians realize they were missing another party.

“Thanks for the hospitality,” Val said, standing up. She touched his cheek. “I’ll have to repay you sometime.”

“Val,” warned Dag.

She merely laughed and gave Justin a wink as she sauntered out. Dag started to follow and then turned back. “Leave your girl hanging for most of tomorrow. Then finally tell her you got a call from the authorities, and they’re letting her off—this time. It’ll stop it from happening again.”

“Thanks for the parenting tip.”

Dag grinned and left with Val.

Justin stayed at the table and poured another glass. There was a storm of emotions raging within him, something he hadn’t experienced in a very long time. He was hurt. Hurt, sad, and angry. He gulped down half the bourbon and slammed it on the table.

He felt like an idiot.

It hadn’t seemed possible that his tangled relationship with Mae could get any weirder. Apparently, he was wrong. Looking back on everything now, he felt sick thinking about some of his behaviors.

You’re sick because you’ve been drinking too much, like usual, said Horatio.

I’m sick because she’s been keeping this tragic love story locked inside her. How long does it take to get over something like that? I knew she was sad in Panama. I could see it, but I went for it anyway. I shouldn’t have.

You didn’t know. And you were drunk then as well, said the raven.

Magnus was kinder. You didn’t act alone. She went for it too, and she was sober.

Why? asked Justin.

Because women find you attractive. Magnus’s tone suggested he didn’t entirely understand that. And you were sad too. Like calls to like.

My life has improved since then, Justin reflected. Well, kind of. But hers got worse. I knew she wasn’t thrilled about an irregular assignment, but I didn’t know I was a punishment! And here I’ve been the whole time, arrogant and presumptuous, giving her a hard time over what happened between us, just because I was offended she wasn’t drooling over me. I’m as shallow as she claims.

When the ravens didn’t deny it, Justin stood up on unsteady legs. “I’m going to see her.”

That’s a bad idea, said Horatio as Justin went inside.