Hot Finish (Fast Track #3)(31)
Author: Erin McCarthy

He didn’t think. Maybe Suzanne had a different opinion on that.

“Well, you’re both lucky,” Evan said, with what Ryder had to assume was exaggerated envy.

“Actually, it was lonely.” Suzanne shrugged. “I would have given anything to have a brother or sister to hang out with.”

Ryder studied Suz’s face. She looked upset but was covering it up. He wasn’t sure what it meant, other than that her childhood had been hard and lonely, just like she’d said. He had always pictured her as a scrappy little blonde facing down cruel peers who were making fun of her clothes, or her lack of parents, or her tiny house, with defiance and wit.

Had he ever really acknowledged that to her? Probably not.

“You can have both of mine,” Eve told her hopefully.

Thoughtful, Ryder lost the thread of the comments sallying back and forth and sank back into his chair. He wondered just how many times he had failed to ask Suzanne about her emotions, just waiting for her to speak them.

If he knew anything, he knew she wasn’t the kind of woman who just offered up her feelings on a regular basis. He should have asked more. Like now.

When Tammy came to the doorway and yelled, “Dinner’s ready! Into the dining room,” Ryder made sure he aligned himself next to Suzanne for the migration.

“Hey,” he told her. “You look nice.”

Her eyebrows shot up but she said, “Thanks.”

“How are you? How are things going with Nikki?”

“Well, she changed her mind about the Elvis and Priscilla theme after seeing Jonas in that suit and she got us kicked out of a bridal shop by breaking the mirror. Other than that, we’re good.”

“Wow, that’s intense, I’m sorry. Though I have to agree with her on Strickland. It wasn’t a good look for him. But I’m really sorry she’s putting you through so much extra work.”

Hunter appeared out of nowhere and tugged his hand. “Sit by me!”

With an apologetic smile, Ryder leaned in and murmured to Suzanne, “Sit by me.”

The urge to kiss her was strong, but since they weren’t alone, he resisted, settling for briefly touching the small of her back before letting Hunter drag him off to the other side of the crowded table.

SUZANNE stared at Ryder’s retreating back as he let Hunter pull him along and tried to figure out what the hell was going on. He was freaking her out with his soul-searching looks and empathy for the Nikki situation. Not that Ryder was normally a total jerk, but he didn’t usually express so much outward concern, and it was unnerving.

But the looks were really making her squirm. He looked thoughtful, like he was seeing her for the first time.

Running her sweaty palms down the front of her skirt, Suzanne assessed the table, wondering where to sit. She supposed she could sit next to Ryder if there were no other empty chairs, but to just go right to him and sit there, well, people would think it was weird. Wouldn’t they? Maybe no one else thought twice about it, but to her it seemed obvious, like it would scream that she and Ryder had crossed the line exes normally don’t venture across.

Then again, she was probably drawing even more attention to them by not speaking to him when he had come into the living room. That had been stupid, not to mention rude, but her heart had sped up when she’d seen him and she had been unable to meet his eyes, not sure what to say. So she had ignored him and that made her a bitch.

Shit.

Tammy was still bustling around the table laying down dishes, as was Mrs. Monroe and Tammy’s mother, but everyone else had taken a seat around the massive oak table. The only available chairs were next to Elec and Mr. Monroe, which had clearly been left open for their respective wives, and the one next to Ryder.

Trying to move neither quickly nor slowly, just some kind of normal, Suzanne went to the chair next to Ryder and sat down, yanking her chair in closer to the table and fussing with her napkin so she didn’t have to look at him. That resolve disintegrated when she felt his hand on her knee. Swinging her head to the left, she gave him a questioning look. Ryder just smiled and squeezed her knee.

With a frown, Suzanne focused on her dinner plate. It had a turkey design on it, a plump elegant gobbler, which freaked Suzanne out. It seemed downright bizarre to be eating turkey off of a turkey. Not that it was going to stop her. She was starving and the food aromas were assaulting her from every direction, and she was going to do some eating, and nothing was going to distract her from that.

Ryder’s hand moved an inch higher, leaving the safe territory of her knee and venturing into the danger zone of the thigh. What the hell was he doing? They hadn’t spoken in days and he was going to choose a family dinner with small children around to get frisky?

She shifted her leg so his hand dropped off.

Elec was carving the turkey, and a bottle of wine was being passed around. Hunter, who had a voice that could overpower a race car engine, held up her hand and yelled, “Wait! Before we eat we should go around the table and say what we’re thankful for. I’ll start.”

“That’s a wonderful idea, baby girl,” Elec told her.

Hunter listed all of her family, her godfather Ty, who was with Imogen and his parents for Thanksgiving, sunshine, and stock car racing as things she was thankful for, and tacked on Suzanne and Ryder at the end as if she’d realized they were sitting right by her. Even if she was just an add-on, Suzanne was touched. When Elec mentioned his family and his wife, the look he gave Tammy was so loving, Suzanne felt a lump forming in her throat. She was so happy for her friend that she’d found a second chance at love.

Mrs. Monroe gave a touching speech about family and the joy of having step-grandchildren, and even Evan managed to give a genuine statement of thanks for his family and friends, though he ended it with, “And I’m thankful for the opportunity to have a career I love, that pays well, and allows me to spend more time with my family. Wait, I guess that’s what you call a mixed blessing.”

He grinned and turned to Pete. “Your turn, buddy.”

Pete, being a ten-year-old boy, said, “I’m thankful for turkey and sweet potatoes, if I ever get to eat them.”

Suzanne was hungry herself and feeling an uncomfortable anxiety creeping over her. While she wanted to be thankful, she wasn’t sure she was. There was a certain melancholy in listening to a large family appreciate each other. It was just her, still, and that kind of hurt.

So for her turn, she did what was typical for her when she was feeling bad—she gave a lighthearted pat answer and hoped like hell they’d just keep on moving down the line. “I’m thankful for my health, Black Friday sales at Macy’s, and my friends.”