Let's Get Textual (Page 23)

“I hate to see you leave, but I love to watch you go, baby,” Zach calls.

My cheeks are on fire as I quicken my pace, a huge smile on my face.

Zach: So, I didn’t want to mention this earlier but…

* * *

Me: You cannot fucking send texts like that!!

* * *

Zach: Oh, sorry. I dozed off. I didn’t sleep much last night. Can’t imagine what could have possibly kept me up. Hmm…

* * *

Me: Zach?

* * *

Zach: Yeah?

* * *

Me: Are you making fun of my snoring again?

* * *

Zach: Me? Nooooo. *bats eyelashes innocently*

* * *

Me: You know, I was thinking of considering last night our second date, but…

* * *

Zach: I take it all back! Your snoring is the most beautiful part of you.

* * *

Me: Better than my ass?

* * *

Zach: And your sass.

* * *

Me: You’re dumb.

* * *

Zach: I love it when you talk dirty to me.

* * *

Me: Omg. Why did I ever let you into my bed?

* * *

Zach: It was the Harry Potter underwear.

* * *

Me: How could I forget.

* * *

Me: Aren’t you supposed to be working?

* * *

Zach: Nah. I called it a day about an hour ago. I’m having dinner with my brother.

* * *

Me: Is your brother hot? Nicer than you? I bet he doesn’t wear Harry Potter panties.

* * *

Zach: Excuse me, I am a stud AND I’m nice. He’s a total ladies’ man, blond, boy-next-door type shit. And he’s a complete asshole.

* * *

Me: Is he really?

* * *

Zach: No, but I’m not about to talk him up when I can talk about me.

* * *

Me: Your confidence knows no bounds. I thought nerds were supposed to be all shy and insecure.

* * *

Zach: I told you, I’m a different breed, baby. ?

* * *

Me: Are you done?

* * *

Zach: Nope.

* * *

Zach: DOWNLOAD ATTACHMENT

* * *

Zach: A picture of me to keep you occupied.

* * *

Me: You have approximately sixty chins in this photo. How will a blob face keep me occupied?

* * *

Me: OMG. Do you think I’m putting THAT in my spank bank?!

* * *

Me: Because I am. Off to diddle myself. Toodles!

* * *

Zach: See, this is when you take a sexy picture and send it to me for MY spank bank.

* * *

Zach: Be a team player, Delia.

* * *

Me: DOWNLOAD ATTACHMENT

* * *

Zach: Why do you think I have a foot fetish?

* * *

Me: You don’t? I assumed all men did. I always have creepers asking for pics on IG and FB.

* * *

Zach: I most definitely do not have any sexual attraction toward your feet.

* * *

Me: So you’re saying my feet are ugly. Gotcha.

* * *

Zach: I didn’t say that. For feet, they’re cute.

* * *

Me: But you don’t want to fuck ’em?

* * *

Zach: I’ve backed myself into a corner here, huh?

* * *

Me: Maybe, and I’ll keep this going alllllll night long. Crazy is my specialty.

* * *

Zach: Don’t I know it.

Zach: I just ate the BEST pizza of my entire life.

* * *

Me: Why do you tease me with such things?

* * *

Zach: I could bring you here on our date Thursday, but I have somewhere else to take you. Maybe our fourth date can be pizza.

* * *

Me: Oh, so you think you’ll be lucky enough to score a fourth date with me?

* * *

Zach: Well, yeah. After you have a taste of my skills in bed, there’s no way you’ll pass up a fourth date with me.

* * *

Me: I’ve just realized why it’s so hard for me to catch my breath around you.

* * *

Zach: My ego is sucking all the air out of the room, isn’t it?

* * *

Me: Bingo, buster.

* * *

Me: I thought you were with your brother?

* * *

Zach: That fucker ditched me for a last-minute date so Robbie and I ordered in to mend my broken heart.

* * *

Me: Are you two close? You and your brother?

* * *

Zach: About average, I’d say. We don’t text and gossip, if that’s what you’re wondering. Most of the time I only see him at holidays because of our schedules. He’s actually my stepbrother, but our parents have been together since I was six.

* * *

Me: After your mom passed?

* * *

Zach: Yep. My dad and his mom met shortly after his dad passed away. It was kind of like the universe brought them together. Slug’s a pain in the dick half the time, but I love the guy.

* * *

Me: Slug?

* * *

Zach: Yep, that’s what we call him. He’s a baseball dude.

* * *

Zach: Are you close with your brother? He’s partially to blame for the wrong number thing, isn’t he?

* * *

Me: Kind of. Yeah, we’re close. My mom worked at the hospital so it was usually just us two fending for ourselves.

* * *

Me: Okay, so I shouldn’t say fending for ourselves. That makes me sound like a dick and unappreciative of all my mom did. We just spent many nights just the two of us because my mom was a hardworking single lady and she wasn’t searching for a man to put a ring on it because she. Is. Fierce.

* * *

Zach: I bet your mom is the shit.

* * *

Me: She really is. You should meet her sometime.

* * *

Me: Oh, awkward…I’m talking about meeting the family and we’re not even officially a couple.

* * *

Zach: We’re not?

* * *

Me: We are?

My phone lights up with a call from Zach.

“Are you saying we aren’t dating?” he says before I can say anything.

“We are…”

“Are you saying you’re wanting to see other people?”

“No…”

“So then we’re a couple.”

I’m quiet, unsure what to say. I’m so scared to label this, which is stupid, I know.

“Delia?”

“Yes, Zach?”

“Do you not want to be?”

I take a deep breath and push out the answer I know is right, even though my head is saying otherwise. “No. I want to be a couple.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. I’m just…scared. I know I shouldn’t put that all on you, but you’re kind of the reason I’m scared. I like you, Zach—a lot—but what if this doesn’t work out? What if we jump in too soon?”

He sighs. “Remember when we were talking about our exes? About the lack of fireworks?”

“Yeah.”

“I swear to god, someone is going to swoop in and take my man card for this shit, but I felt them with you. When we first kissed, I knew right then you were worth jumping in with both feet and taking a risk.”

I don’t let myself overthink his words, wanting to keep my head level and clear.

“What if I’m not worth the risk?”

“We’ll never know if we don’t take it.”

“Say you’re a couple already, Dalilah!” Robbie’s voice comes loud through the speaker. “He paused the movie during an epic scene!”

“How many times have I told you that her name is Delia. Deal-ya. Get it?”

“You talk about me with Robbie?” I ask.

“Sometimes.”

“Say yes! He looks like someone kicked his goat!”

“Shut the fuck up, Robbie!”

I laugh. “If I say yes, will he stop shouting?”

“YES!” Robbie shouts again.

“I’ll take the risk, Zach, but you better be worth it.”

“You’ve seen my Harry Potter underwear—you know I’m worth it.” Then he whispers, “Wink.”

Fourteen

Zach: Are you excited for our date Thursday?

* * *

Me: No.

* * *

Zach: Are you lying?

* * *

Me: Maybe, but you’ll never know.

* * *

Zach: I mean, if you’re not excited, we can always cancel…

* * *

Me: Those three dots aren’t going to get me this time.

* * *

Zach: You wound me.

* * *

Me: Your ego is big enough, it can take the hit.

* * *

Zach: Your sass is on point tonight. Everything okay?

* * *

Me: Sigh. Yeah. It was a long day. My professors are trying to cram a bunch of last-minute studying in before Thanksgiving break.

* * *

Zach: Do we need to reschedule the date? Give you time to relax? I don’t mind waiting for you, Delia.

* * *

Me: I think it would be better if we had the date. That way I can focus on something other than schoolwork for a bit.

* * *

Zach: Then it’s still on.

* * *

Zach: Oh, and Delia?

* * *

Zach: DOWNLOAD ATTACHMENT

* * *

Me: *heart eyes* You are SO cute!

* * *

Zach: Thanks, I know.

* * *

Me: I was talking about Marshmallow.

* * *

Zach: Wounded again.

Me: TELL ME YOU DID NOT!

* * *

Zach: I DID NOT.

* * *

Zach: Also, what did I do?

* * *

Me: YOU SENT ME A FUCKING COUCH.

* * *

Zach: It’s there already? That was FAST.

* * *

Me: How? How in the world did you manage to do this so quickly?!

* * *

Zach: Money talks.