Letters from Home(5)
Author: Bethanne Strasser

She’d come with an entourage.

“Zack?”

He looked up and found her waiting for him. He made the opening break and nodded to her. “Your turn.”

She stared at him with a blush rising on her cheeks. “Where do I start?”

He relaxed, smiled at her, then studied the table, looking for her first move. “Over here,” he started and took her arm to guide her around to where the cue ball sat. “Go for the solids. You can hit the four in, no problem. Easy peasy.”

She stood behind her cue and leaned over the table.

“No. Not like that.” Zack moved in behind her.

The idea hadn’t started out as a ploy, but now that he was here, breathing in the delicious scent of her perfume, he enjoyed the heat of her against his skin where his arms met hers. They were hip to hip. He cupped her hand in his and rested the cue stick on top of it. She fit perfectly under his arm and against his body.

He cleared his throat as lust shot straight through his bones. “Ready?”

She turned her head and eyed him suspiciously. Her gaze fell to his lips for a fraction of a second, but she turned back to the table and took her shot. The light bracelets at her wrists chimed, and the purple ball rolled into the corner pocket. “Okay.” She grinned, turning into his space. His hands went to her shoulders where they met skin, supple and smooth.

“That wasn’t too hard at all,” she whispered. Her breath seemed caught in her throat, as if maybe, maybe she felt something, too.

Zack stayed where he was, absorbing her warmth, the happiness that seemed to roll off her. This was what he’d wanted for her when he asked her to go out with him. Just a chance to have some fun, remember what it was like when they were younger.

He brushed strands of her hair from her face, the touch making his heart stutter. The urge to kiss her overwhelmed him. “Lena.”

“Yes?”

With his thumb, Zack traced a line along her collarbone. He tunneled his hand under the thick weight of her dark hair. Her eyes were wide with wonder. When he dipped his head to taste her, her lips parted, and she sucked in a breath.

Zack’s heart was pounding. Like the staccato of his M16 beating against his chest.

The kiss was soft and slow, and at first, she didn’t respond at all. On the verge of letting her go completely, he felt her hands come up and grip his waist. Her lips moved against his.

Nothing in his entire life had felt so right before. He sank into her.

“Hey guys…Whoa!”

Zack groaned at the intrusion. Lena broke away, sucked in another breath, this one filled with shock and what-did-I-do?

His eyes slid shut. Damn it.

“I—” Lena scrambled out of his reach. “I better go.”

“Lena—” Zack went after her but was stopped in his tracks by Big Brother and a shove that sent his pulse pounding.

“What the hell is going on, Benson?”

Zack rubbed away the impression of Mike’s fingers against his chest and peered over his friend’s shoulder. Lena sat with her sisters. She hadn’t gone far. “Just a friendly game of pool and some decent conversation for a change,” he answered with a roll of his shoulders as he picked up his cue.

“What are you doing with my sister?” Mike stood at the ready—shoot first and ask questions later. His fists clenched at his sides. “Zack?”

Zack hit the ten ball into the side pocket and straightened. None of your damn business. But that wasn’t going to fly. He shrugged. “Nothing…anymore.”

“Is that supposed to be funny?” Mike’s voice vibrated with restrained fury.

“No,” Zack bit off, stopping the harsher words that wanted let loose. He threw the cue down on the table. “I better go.” He did not want to fight with Mike about this.

Mike grabbed his arm. “You might be my friend.” He shook his head. “But don’t mess with Lena. She’s inexperienced…and fragile. She’s not used to dealing with guys like you.”

“Let go of my arm.” Zack frowned, pulling out of Mike’s grasp as he tried to reconcile the woman Mike described with the woman he knew.

Mike filled the doorway and crossed his arms over his chest.

Zack blew out a breath. “How long have we been friends, Mike?”

Mike didn’t answer right away.

“How long?” he demanded.

“How the hell should I know? Twenty years?”

“Twenty-five, you shithead.” Zack let the endearment slip as the irritation inside of him started to boil over. “I’m not messing with Lena.”

Mike opened his mouth as if to object.

“Besides,” Zack interrupted. “Lena deals with guys like us… All. The. Time. She can handle herself better than a lot of soldiers I know.” He shook his head. “Wake up, Mike. I want your sister. I’ve wanted your sister for years. Now I have to convince her I’m worth her time.”

He left Mike speechless in his wake and made his excuses to the rest of the family. He waved a hand at their protests. “I gotta go.”

Go blow off some steam.

Lena avoided his gaze, but he didn’t let that stop him from giving her shoulder a squeeze before he left.

Zack reached his car, blew out a breath, and leaned against the hood. She’d kissed him, and she’d kissed him good. There was no mistaking her response. But then she’d run away like the Taliban were on her heels. So, what did she want?

Frustrated, he hopped into the car and headed home. This had all seemed so simple when it started. How the heck was he supposed to win Lena over with her brothers and sisters overlooking their every move? Maybe she really had joined the Army to be alone.

Back at the house, he still crackled with nervous energy. He wanted to go for a run, but chose to occupy his brain instead, so he compiled a new version of the code and started running compliance tests for the Sacramento project. Still, his thoughts kept returning to Lena. He needed to get her alone, tell her everything, and beg her to kiss him again, because that kiss was proof. Proof that some part of her was willing to give him a shot.

Over and over, he ran more trials, testing again and again, while playing out various scenarios in his mind. He was running out of time. The annual Christmas Concert was in two days, and the Winter Carnival would be winding down. He could almost picture Catalina performing in the finale, surrounded by poinsettias—

He jumped up from his desk so fast he knocked over the chair. The concert. It was true the Rodriguez family was everywhere, but maybe he could turn that to his advantage. With a sly grin, he picked up his phone and dialed the familiar number.

Chapter Six

…I heard about your spell with the flu. Your dad said you were sent to Germany for a week where they hooked you up with fluids. Must have been hard for you. Everyone at home was worried and praying for you. Your mom lit at least ten candles on her first visit to church. Haha.

I think of you often and can’t wait until you’re home where those of us who love you can take care of you for a change…

Lena read through bits of the letter she’d gotten in June. On the shorter side, compared to the others, which were filled with pages of small town talk, this one had been short and sweet. The first letter to indicate that he loved her, even if it had been grouped with ‘those of us’.

This man had seen what she needed even from thousands of miles away. Someone to take care of her. She took a deep breath. She really was in love with the letter writer.

Anger crept into her thoughts. Where had Zack been all year while she was deployed? Working? Playing? Moving home?

Staying busy, that’s for sure. He hadn’t stopped to write her a letter. How could he kiss her like that? She clenched her hands into fists.

She looked down to where she’d been icing cookies with her mother’s decorating tips. A swipe of black icing left an angry belt across Frosty’s middle. “Oops.”

Calmly, like the adult she was, she set the pastry bag on the table. She had a box full of letters. And she wasn’t going to ruin the feelings they’d evoked because a man, who was more like a brother, suddenly had romantical feelings for her. “Romantical. Is that even a word?”

“Talking to yourself?”

Lena straightened her spine and picked up the abandoned icing. “I am making cookies for the concert tomorrow night, if you must know.”

Cat sat down at the table, a Cheshire grin on her face.

“What?”

“You left awful early last night.”

“I was tired.”

Her sister shrugged. “Funny how Zack left early, too.”

Lena gave her sister a pointed look. “You’re beating around the bush.”

Cat laughed. “Mike seemed pretty pissed, too. We could have drowned in the undercurrents, Lena.”

“You know how to swim.”

Her sister leaned in, picked up a cookie, and bit into it.

“Hey!” Lena pulled the cookie tray back to her side of the table. “Those are for the reception.”

“Did he kiss you?”

Lena forced her face not to react, even as the icing in her hand slipped. “Of course not,” she lied.

“Hmm.”

Lena set the black icing on the counter and picked up the orange. Every year, her mother—or any of the women who were home—made cookies for the town’s Holiday Concert. All the churches and schools brought the best of their musicians together and performed at the high school auditorium.

Cat had a starring role this year, singing in the grand finale.

“You nervous?” Lena asked, deliberately changing the subject. She began adding carrot noses to each of the cookies.

“Not as nervous as you were after playing pool with Zack for all of about…oh, five minutes.” Her smile feigned innocence, and Lena knew she could either fess up or have it tortured out of her. Was it really such a big deal? Hadn’t she dreamed about kissing him when she was a teenager?

The real thing had blown every fantasy out of the water. Even this morning, she could still feel the pressure of his lips against hers, his hand on her neck. Every nuance of his touch filtered through her senses if she let herself stop and think.

“How was it?” Cat persisted.

“How was what?” Mom asked as she came through the door.

“Nothing,” Lena answered curtly with a glare at her sister.

Mom came around and placed a kiss on her cheek. “You look so much better today. Every day better than the last. As it should be.”

“I feel better, Mom.”

“Good, because I have been asked to help set up the auditorium for the concert. And I need a few extra hands.”

Cat quickly stood. “I better go…practice, or shower. Something.” She was gone before either Lena or Mom could even open their mouths.

Lena laughed, “We’d have been spanked.”

“Probably true. She’s the youngest and a little spoiled.”

Lena finished the last cookie. “When do you need me?”

“Whenever you’re done with these, we’ll go.”

She set the icing down. “I’m ready when you are.”

After calling Catalina back to the kitchen to do the clean up, Mom and Lena headed for the high school. Part of her wanted to spill her guts, but she’d never been one to do that before…and her mom? What would mom think of her kissing Zack?

His touch had wrenched her from rational thought, and she’d found herself diving in, enjoying the feel of him against her. Betrayed by her own body. But she was not going to let him ruin everything.

She would just have to work around him. Avoid him for a little while longer. Hadn’t she spent years getting around her brothers? Making dates and keeping them to herself so that she’d have no one checking up on her?

But this is Zack. Smart, kind—usually—and gorgeous.

“Oh, good. Zack is here already.”

“What?” She straightened and scanned the area. “Why is he here?”

His little sports car sat in the parking lot near the exterior gym door.

“You sound horrified, Lena.”

She was! She didn’t want to see him right now…or ever. How could she face him after last night? “Mami, I can’t go in there.”

“Lena, you’re being ridiculous. Why not?”

“I just can’t. It’s embarrassing. I’m embarrassed.”

Mami turned in the driver seat and took her hands. “What has gotten into you?”

“I don’t know!” She cried, and felt the rise of a great flood of panic and uncertainty. She just wasn’t used to this. She wanted things back the way they were before she’d left for Iraq. She wanted everything in order.

She pulled her hands free of her mother’s grasp.

“Did something happen between you two?”

“No,” she answered, a smidgen of guilt riding the word. “Not really.”

Her mom studied her, and Lena hoped to God she couldn’t read her mind. “I know you’re beyond needing me.” She tapped her hand on the steering wheel, then took Lena’s chin in her hand. Just a small touch that was gone in an instant as Lena met her gaze. “But that doesn’t mean the worry goes away.”

“I’m sure it’s nothing.” Lena remained silent as they got out of the car and entered the school. There were boxes on the stage—big bins lined up along the edge, and below them, a pallet filled with poinsettias. Zack was nowhere in sight.

Yet.

She’d have to face him eventually. Might as well drum up some of the determination that had gotten her through college and med school and tell him to back off. They’d grown up together, even worked together off and on through the years. It was her turn for romance, not the same old, buddy-buddy friendship she was bound to get with Zack.

Playing pool? Hanging out at all their old stomping grounds and fishing with her brothers? No. No more reliving the past. She wanted an adult relationship of mutual trust, commitment, and affection, in the present day. She wanted to move beyond the past.