Letters from Home(7)
Author: Bethanne Strasser

“You’d already taken care of it by the time I showed up. You sure can raise your voice, Lena. I saw a few left hooks in there, too.”

“Oh, please.” Lena denied. “I do not think so.”

He smiled with a shrug.

“Hey guys! Over here.” Juan called them over, and Mom smiled contentedly with a little tilt to her head as she eyed Lena and Zack at her side. Lena went around and kissed her mom and dad, who were sitting next to each other in their matching canvas chairs.

When Lena took a seat at the picnic table, Cat handed her a warm thermos. “Hot cocoa.”

She took a sip. “Mmm. Just what I needed.” She glanced at Zack. She tilted her head in question. She’d never seen him hesitate to enter the family circle.

“I should go check in with my dad.”

She wondered if she had done something wrong, but then Zack’s gaze found someone behind her. Mike came up and set a hand on her shoulder with a squeeze.

Lena froze, shrugging off the touch as anger flashed through her. “Za—”

“I’ll call you tomorrow,” he interrupted. He didn’t want her to cause a scene. Not that she’d ever been a scene maker in the past, but if Mike really thought he was going to play guard dog…

She nodded. “You do that, Zack.” And that was her statement, to him, to the family. She made her own choices. And she’d damn well see whomever she pleased, even if he was her brother’s best friend.

Cat nudged her. Juan cleared his throat. Mike remained the stoic guard at her side.

She’d known it wouldn’t be easy to bring a guy home—even at her age. She just hadn’t considered how awkward it would be if Zack were the guy.

Chapter Eight

“What in hell are you waiting for? You’re going to let that woman get away!”

Zack bit back the inappropriate retort on the tip of his tongue. “I don’t let her do anything, Dad.”

His father had been distant when Zack was a kid, but they were much closer these days. He chalked it up to joining the Army. His dad had done the same when he was nineteen. Now, their relationship had evolved from father-son to good friends. His dad saw more than Zack let anyone else see, including his infatuation for one Elena Rodriguez.

“You like her, don’t you?”

“It’s a little complicated.”

“Well, of course it’s complicated.” His dad banged a fist against the table. “Otherwise, you’d probably be dating a man!”

Zack chuckled when the waitress came up and timidly set their dinners on the table. He thanked her then placed his napkin in his lap. They’d been coming here for lunch every Saturday since he’d gotten home.

He picked up his fork and stabbed the steak he’d ordered. “I just need a little more time.”

“I’d think time isn’t something you have a great deal of. What you need”—he pointed with his fork, narrowing his familiar gray eyes—“is a plan B.”

Frustration ate at him. Those stupid letters. Christmas was in three days. Another short week after that, and Lena would return to duty. Back to Sam Houston for new orders, a possible relocation, and three more years of service.

Why? Why had he made such a ridiculous promise? Because Christmas was about love. It was about family. It was early mornings with his pretend family, sitting near the tree. The year he’d been given his first pocket knife, and the time Mrs. R had bought him a sweater. He’d lost his family once and been gifted with a replacement—the Rodriquez family. Was it too much to ask for the best Christmas present ever, Lena’s love?

Zack cleared his throat, folded his napkin, and laid it next to his plate. “I had a plan for Christmas morning to tell her everything. I didn’t expect it to be this dicey. I definitely didn’t think I’d have to go through her guard to get to her.”

His dad laughed. “Uncle EJ made a stink the day I came for your mother.”

Zack stopped the forkful of food halfway to his mouth. His dad rarely spoke of the old days, or even of his mom anymore.

“It was different in those days. Seemed like we all had a wild hair. Your mom’s parents didn’t want her to go. They thought it was a mistake to marry a soldiering man.” His dad shook off the memory. “Maybe it was.”

Zack suddenly knew what it meant for a sentence to be loaded. Holy moly. “No,” he answered succinctly. “It wasn’t. Besides, Lena’s a soldier, too. And perfectly capable of making her own decisions.”

“Son.” Zack nearly dropped his fork. His father never called him that. A wistful expression clouded the old man’s face. “You never know how long you’ll have, so make good use of your time.”

He thought about what his father had said throughout the day. When he wanted to go to her, Lena had disappeared to Sacramento with her sisters and mother. Christmas shopping. Now the day was over, and he hadn’t seen her at all.

He tossed and turned in bed, the one he’d treated himself to after eight years in bachelor quarters and less than luxury accommodations. He wanted her here, next to him, even for the short time she was home. He wanted to hear her whisper his name and say that she loved him.

But she’d fallen in love with the letter guy, who was only a part of him. The silly romantic part…he should have taken more time to swear or tell a dirty joke or two.

What if she didn’t love the rest of him?

Zack woke groggy and restless. He showered, lingering longer than usual as thoughts of his predicament continued to fill his mind. But maybe it wasn’t all that bad. They’d had a good time on Friday night. And she’d stood up for him, too. He hadn’t expected that.

“She loves you,” he said to the face in the mirror before he slid his razor down over his cheek. His stomach clenched, hearing the words echo against the tiles of his bathroom. He just needed to show her he loved her. Show her what he offered her was real.

After dressing, he drove the half-mile to Sacred Heart Church and parked his Camaro. The way the early morning light illuminated the rose window above the main doors, he could believe he had a chance. If there was one thing he believed in right at this moment, it was hope.

A knock on the window made his heart jump and pound against his rib cage. Mike was standing there with a look of what-the-hell on his face.

Zack rolled down the window.

“Are you coming in or have they finally ex-communicated you?”

“Haha.” Zack closed his window and opened the door to get out. A breeze swept through the parking lot. “It’s going to be warm today.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Mike hesitated, the pause filled with uncertainty and passive aggression. They’d never had anything between them before. “Look, it’s taking a while to get used to you…and Lena. It’s weird.”

“I don’t want it to mess with our friendship.”

“Oh yeah? Well then, let’s go fishing.”

He hedged. He didn’t want to have to choose, but he would. “I can’t promise.”

“Whatever, amigo.” Mike eyed him as they walked up to the church doors then held one open. “See what women do? We’ve never had a woman between us before.”

“Lena’s not a woman-between-us. She’s your sister.”

Mike pointed. “And don’t you forget it.”

Zack about stumbled through the door. Righting himself quickly, he turned to stare at his best friend. “Was that a threat?”

“No. Just a promise.”

He took a deep breath when Mike continued into the church. Things were bound to change. He was ready for it. He’d been waiting for it.

Zack blessed himself before rounding the pews to the left and finding the Rodriguez family near the front. Every Sunday, this he could count on. She was, of course, smack dab in the middle of the bunch.

Desperate times call for desperate measures.

He smiled for Juan, who sat on the end, and pointed toward Lena. “Excuse me,” he whispered, lifting the empty kneeler with his toe and side-stepping into the pew. He bumped into Maria’s knees and then stepped on the edge of Jaime’s shoe. “Sorry.”

Jaime shook his hand in a silent hello, and finally, after squeezing past Cat, Zack was next to Lena.

He waited for everyone to scoot down toward the aisle, then turned and sat, ignoring the warning look he was getting from Mike and the Cheshire grin he was getting from Maria. He nodded to Carlos, who sat at the center aisle with Anabel, a contemplative frown on his face—not unfriendly, but not that amicable, either. Anabel gave him the motherly smile he’d been graced with for the last twenty-two years.

Lena knelt beside him, her long, shiny hair plaited down her back and exposing the long line of her neck. So he knelt, too. And he bowed his head to pray…that she wanted him.

“What are you doing?” she spoke under her breath, leaning into him a little and leaving his heart stuttering from her closeness. “Could you be any more disruptive? People are trying to pray!”

“I wanted to sit next to you.”

This was plan B? His mouth had a mind of its own. He was lucky he hadn’t added, for the rest of my life. There was some sense still swimming around up there.

Lifting her head just enough to catch his eye, her beautifully arched brows furrowed. He liked seeing her confused. He’d never rocked the boat before, but with as little time as he had left, finesse and grace weren’t going to cut it anymore.

…

He’s not my brother.

That was the bottom line. The evidence of something growing between them made her want to hurry back to the safety net of her job in the Army. But that was fickle. And she had never been fickle.

Her longing over the last year for something more, for what had been promised in those letters, called her the liar she would be if she snuck away now. Wishing Zack had written those letters sat at the pit of her stomach like a lead ball.

“Whatcha doin’ there?”

Lena glanced up as Catalina came into the bedroom and waved to the pile of envelopes on the bed. “Sorting.”

“Are these all from your secret admirer?”

Shaking her head, she shoved a pile toward her sister.

“Oh.” Catalina shuffled through a few of them. “I didn’t know Zack had been writing to you.”

“Not much.” Lena shrugged. “I wrote to him before joining. I wanted to hear how it was, ask some questions. He wrote back.”

They were not love letters. They were usually short. More like quick notes typed between tasks. Of course, they’d always made her laugh, the little stories about his unit or a particular night out with the guys. Anecdotes. Encouragement.

Frustration was like sandpaper on her soul. “I needed a friend who knew what it was like. Zack had already been in for five years. Read one.”

His first reply had been short, railing at her for considering the idea. It had hurt a little but made her even more determined to join than ever. Without that letter, she probably would have chickened out. When her anger had subsided—a few months later—she’d written back.

Almost twelve years of letters. Not a single romantic thought in the bunch.

But she still loved him. And now, she had to admit, she loved him as more than a brother or a friend. “Grrr! Seriously? Cat, what am I supposed to do?”

“About what?”

Lena rolled her eyes and picked up the pile of letters from her secret admirer. “The letters. How can I leave this guy hanging?” She bit her lip. “I think I’m in love with Zack.”

“I knew it.” Cat picked up one of the love letters from the pile sitting next to her and turned it over in her hand. “But, you definitely need to meet this guy.”

Catalina tossed the letter to the bed and stretched her legs, leaning back against the headboard. “We all love Zack. He’s like part of the family, even if you are kissing him.” She smirked. “This, though…well, if you don’t meet him, you’ll always wonder, don’t you think?”

Maria showed up in her scrubs after a long night at the hospital. Hair was coming out of her bun and sticking out in all directions, dark circles marred her eyes.

Lena patted the bed. “Tired?”

Her sister gave in to the invitation. “Exhausted. There was a fire at one of the bars downtown last night. The emergency room stayed busy. We had to fly two of the victims to UC Davis in Sacramento.”

“Oh, honey. Anyone we know?”

Maria shook her head, fatigue escaping as tears and running down her cheeks. She hurriedly wiped them away. “Sorry.”

Catalina reached over and patted Maria’s leg.

Bolstering herself, Maria smiled. “So, what’s going on with Zack?”

“Not Zack. I’m convincing Lena to go meet her secret admirer,” Catalina answered.

“What if it is Zack?”

“What?” Cat broke off.

“What?” Lena’s brain misfired, actually stopped working completely as she tried to process Maria’s suggestion.

“That would be convenient, yes?” Maria kept her eyes closed as she spoke. “I wouldn’t care who it is. It’s romantic. Nothing romantic ever happens around here.”

“That’s not true!” Catalina sat up in protest. “You went out with Mario last month, and he brought you a rose.”

Lena tried to keep up, but she was stuck on Zack. “Mario?”

“Yeah, that wasn’t going to work. Mario? And Maria?” She cringed.

“You didn’t want it to work out.” Catalina pouted.

“Shut up, Cat.” Maria toed off her shoes and curled into one of the throw pillows. “You should both know that I’m giving up dating. My New Year’s resolution is to not get involved with anyone this year.”

Catalina laughed. “Come on. It won’t last!”