Lost for You (Lost #2)(6)
Author: B.J. Harvey

“Dude, can we move it along?”

“B, unless you want me to cramp up and crash into a ditch, you’ll give me five minutes to stretch my legs,” he snaps.

“Sorry. I just need to see for myself that she is still alive and breathing. If Evans has anything to do with this, I will take pleasure in shooting him dead myself,” I say through gritted teeth.

He looks over at me with sympathy as he walks back towards the driver’s door. “You and me both, brother, but one thing at a time. Let’s get you to your girl, then go from there. We can deal with our dear old dad after that.”

After three more hours of driving, we’re finally pulling up outside the hospital. I pull my phone out and text Shay.

Brax: Where is she?

Shay: Fourth Floor, northern wing. She’s sleeping right now, but I saw her a few hours ago, and she was okay.

Brax: Where are you?

Shay: Outside the elevator on the ground floor waiting for you.

Brax: Roger that.

Devon and I follow the signs and sure enough, there is Shay waiting outside the elevator for us. I give him a hug, quietly talking in his ear, “I’ll never be able to make this up to you, bro. You saved her.”

He pulls away and looks at me. “I would do it again in a heartbeat.”

“I know, and that means the world to me. I couldn’t see a tail outside, but could you take Devon and maybe case out the parking lot just to be sure. Everything is unpredictable right now, so I’d rather have Devon on board with us. The boss man has cleared it all too,” I explain, accepting Shay’s nod as his agreement.

“Go see your girl, Brax. She needs you now more than ever,” he says before walking over to Devon and shaking his hand. “Let’s go, D. We can catch up while we’re walking.”

I look over at Devon. “I’ll see you soon, brother. Stick with Shay. He’ll fill you in on everything. And thank you…….for everything.”

“Sure thing,” he replies before turning and walking away with Shay.

I step into the elevator, and the sterile, dry air surrounds me as the smell of antiseptic spray enters my lungs. It’s overwhelming; almost sickening.

I’ve always hated hospitals, but after my adopted mother’s cancer returned, we spent a lot of time in one while she got her treatments. Since then, I have resented them. Leah was the strongest, most prolific female role model in my life. She loved me for who I was, not because she had to. She never once made me feel like I wasn’t her own child, I felt adored and cherished, and she taught me to value myself and treat everyone with respect.

When she died a year after her diagnosis, Roger and I only had each other left. Her death only brought us closer, and my father was my hero from that moment on. He made sure that I always knew that Leah was proud of me, and how happy I made both of them by coming into their lives. Even now, I know that they’re both looking down on me. It makes this moment even harder. I feel like I’ve let Elle down, as well as my parents. I should have stood my ground and refused to leave her side a week ago. I will spend the rest of my life making it up to her.

If she’ll give me the chance.

I reach the nurse’s station on the fourth floor and get directions to Elle’s room. They tell me that she is sleeping but that I can visit her if I’m quiet and don’t disturb her. I walk towards the door of her room and come to a complete stop the moment I see her. I can feel myself choking up just at the sight of her. It’s been seven long days since I saw her last, when I left her sleeping side, shattering both of our hearts in the process.

She looks so broken. Her brown hair is messy and unkempt. Her skin, once radiant and glowing, looks clammy and pale, and her beautiful green eyes are hidden as she sleeps peacefully. The only sounds in the room are the constant beeping of her heartbeat on the monitor and the whooshing sound of the ventilator as it breathes for her.

I will my legs to move and slowly approach the chair beside her bed. Sitting down on the edge of it, I reach forward and take her limp hand in mine. It feels so warm; the electric touch that I’ve always felt with Elle still radiates through me.

I lay my head down on her hand. It’s the closest I can be to her right now, and I’ll take whatever I can get.

As Devon and I walk outside the hospital doors, the sunlight hurts my eyes. I’ve been inside the hospital’s stifling four walls for over fourteen hours now; bright light is a bit of a shock to my system.

I look around the parking lot, realizing that I don’t even have a car here. “Where’s your car, bro?” I ask.

“Just over here. The white Dodge Ram,” he says proudly.

I look over his truck as we get closer to it. “Nice ride,” I murmur.

“Yeah, man. Gotta have a nice ride to get the tail,” he says with a laugh.

“Is that my problem?” I reply dryly.

“Maybe, bro, maybe. So where are we headed? I could really do with a shower and a change of clothes.”

I pause for a moment, thinking of what to do. “We’ll head to Elle’s apartment. I need to check it out now that the police are finished with it. See how the f**ker got in.”

“Sweet. Put the address in the GPS and we’ll head off.”

I send Brax a text to let him know what we’re doing.

Shay: Just heading back to the apartment to have a shower and check the place out. Will need a clean up and alarm system too. Want me to sort it out?

Brax: Yeah, whatever she needs, man. Charge it to my card.

Shay: You okay?

Brax: I will be when she wakes up.

After about ten minutes, we park outside Elle’s building. There are no police cars or yellow police tape outside; you’d have no idea that the owner of the building was shot in her bed last night. I run my hands through my hair. I’m terrified by what I’m going to see in the light of day. She was shot in her bed, and although I turned the bathroom light on when I was looking for a towel, I never really got a full view of the scene. I was too focused on getting to Elle and keeping her alive.

It’s been nine years since I have been in a situation like this; a woman I care a lot about being shot and me being unable to do anything about it. I didn’t even question what had to be done. I had to do whatever it took to save her life. At least this time I was able to save Elle. I wasn’t able to save Brenna when she needed me, and I lost the love of my life because of it. I shake my head, trying to snap out of this walk down memory lane. I have to focus on Elle right now.