Masquerade (Heven and Hell #1)(55)
Author: Cambria Hebert

“Believe what?”

“I thought you understood; I raised you with the Lord.”

“Mom, it was one kiss.” It wasn’t as if we were naked on the floor.

“You did so well after the accident. I understood that you were sullen and self-conscious about your scar.”

She wasn’t making any sense.

“But these past few weeks, I began to see the change in you: the cheering, the parties, the boys.”

I felt like she’d slapped me. “I was helping the cheer team out at a competition so they wouldn’t get disqualified. It was two parties, this whole year, and the only boy is Sam.”

“It’s a slippery slope to sin.”

“What are you saying, Mother?”

“After you missed so much Bible study lately the pastor tried to tell me, but I wouldn’t listen. But after what I just saw…I can’t ignore it.”

My stomach cramped. This wasn’t going to be good. “I’ll be better,” I promised, not even understanding what I was promising.

“It’s too late. You were marked, the damage is done.”

“Marked?”

“By evil. That scar on your face proves it.”

“You…you… think I’m evil?” I swallowed the bile rising in my throat.

Mom stood from the table and smoothed her skirt and top. “Don’t worry, we can fix this.”

How do you fix someone you thought was evil?

“There is this camp, beginning right after school lets out. It will save you.”

“I…” My own mother thought I was evil, and that my scars proved it. I’d thought a lot about these scars, how they made me look and feel. But never once, not in a million years, had I ever thought that they were because I was marked by evil. But my mother had. My own mother didn’t think I was good, she was ashamed of me. I felt myself worth shrivel.

“I know you have questions about camp. I need to use the restroom, and then we can have a long talk.”

Numbly I nodded as she went. At the door she paused and looked back. “This is for the best, Heven. Someday you’ll thank me.”

When the bathroom door closed behind her, I went to the back door and opened it soundlessly. There, beneath a large oak tree was Sam. His face was drawn and pale. He’d heard everything. We stared at each other from across the yard; the distance between us seemed tremendous. From inside the house I heard the toilet flush. I jumped, and Sam stiffened. Moving quickly I stepped out onto the porch, shutting the door behind me. I couldn’t stay here. When I reached him he held out his hand, and I took it.

Then we ran.

Chapter Sixteen

Heven

Where did you go when your life was spiraling out of control? To a place that felt safe. A place you knew you could be yourself.

Even if being yourself meant being evil. Deep down I knew I wasn’t evil but a small part of me whispered, “What if?”

“Take me to my grandma’s. Please,” I whispered. It hurt to talk. It hurt to breathe. How could she think that I was evil? Was I?

Sam nodded and fired up the engine of his truck. At first I thought him watching over me was like being stalked. Now, I was thankful. Things between me and him were not even close to being good, but if I was honest with myself (and right now I had to be), I trusted him. I peeked over at him to see him staring through the windshield, jaw set, face hard. My mother hadn’t been nice to him, banning him from the house and looking at him like he was trash.

“I’m sorry.”

The wheel jerked beneath his hands and he looked over at me. “You’re sorry?”

“My mother was very rude to you.”

“Rude to me?” he choked. “I don’t care about me. I’m so sorry that she said those things to you. It’s all my fault. If I hadn’t brought China into your life then your mother wouldn’t think that you are evil. Shit, because of me, your own mother thinks you were marked by Satan.”

I stared out my window. I didn’t want to think about the things she’d said.

“It’s not true,” he said roughly.

“Maybe it is.” Ahh, and there was the thought that bothered me most. What if there was something bad inside of me?

He laughed a hollow sound. “I know all about evil, and you are not it.”

“Do you?”

“I’m a hellhound, Heven.”

I still had no clue what that really meant. We turned onto the dirt lane that led to Grandma’s house, and I began to panic. What if Mom called her? What if Grandma turned me away and said she agreed with my mother? What would I do, where would I go? I couldn’t breathe, and I clawed at my throat, wheezing. My whole body began to shake and I broke out in a clammy sweat.

I felt a strong hand on the back of my head, forcing it down between my knees. “Deep breaths, honey. In, out, in, out.”

I tried to match my breathing to his voice, and after several tries, some of the tightness in my chest receded. I kept my head down because I didn’t want him to see my tears. This was by far the worst day of my life.

“It’s okay. Everything’s going to be fine.”

I noticed that the truck wasn’t moving anymore. I looked up. We were parked near the house, beneath a tree. Sam swiped the pad of his thumb across my cheek. I sighed, sitting all the way up. He already saw that I was crying. “Thanks for giving me a ride.” I placed my hand on the handle to get out.

“What? I don’t even get a thank you for giving you a ride?” he asked in mock horror.

I smiled and turned back toward him. “Thank you, Sam. For the ride.”

“There’s that beautiful smile. I missed it.” He said, his fingers inching across the seat toward me.

I turned away, pulled the handle and opened my door.

“You can walk away from me just like that?” he asked low, all trace of joking aside.

No.

I was in his arms, crushed against him so fast that I wasn’t aware he’d moved. A broken sob escaped me, and I pushed closer against him. I knew that I should think about everything he’d done and all the things I had yet to know, but in that moment I didn’t care. He made me feel better, and that counted for something, didn’t it? I felt his lips brush the top of my head, and I let him hold me a little longer. Too soon, I sat up, putting distance between us. Out of the corner of my eye I saw movement and looked toward the house. Grandma was on the porch, watching us with the phone clutched in her hand.