Masquerade (Heven and Hell #1)(7)
Author: Cambria Hebert

The Hope

Her crying was unsettling. I wanted to reach out to her and take away her pain, but without pain there would be no joy. I took a moment to close my eyes to feel the warmth of love and peace course through me, and I sent it out to her for comfort.

It disturbed me that she was being watched by those with sinful agendas. Her path was so tentative it could turn either way. I prayed that she would choose the path that would lead her towards happiness. She could be the answer — but she would need help. I looked upon her once again; she lay crying in a darkened corner, looking alone and lost.

You are not lost. You are brave.

Love is the answer to it all.

Your turn for love is near.

I prayed that he was deserving of her love. I prayed that he could cast aside what he probably should be. It takes a brave and strong soul to deny part of yourself, not many can accomplish it. I watched her for another long moment. It was still too early to know which way this would go.

The road ahead holds many tests challenging everything she ever believed. I whispered a prayer for her inner strength to guide her on her path. She was going to need it.

Heven

A long while later I let myself into Grandma’s kitchen. I wasn’t crying anymore; I was seething with anger.

“How was your ride?” Grandma asked, her back turned, as she stirred something in a pot on the stove.

“Fine.”

She turned and glanced at me as I poured a glass of water. “I saw you and Jasper run into the barn from the forest.”

“Thought I heard something.”

“Probably just a squirrel, they’ve begun coming out now that the weather is warming.”

I said nothing because that was why I was angry. It probably was just a squirrel, and I acted like I was being hunted by a…well by who knows what? I was a stupid scaredy-cat! My own shadow scared me, and it was embarrassing. At the moment it also made me extremely angry. I didn’t want to be a baby.

“I made spaghetti,” Grandma said, pretending not to notice my foul mood.

“It’s Thursday. I have Bible study at church, remember?”

“Not tonight. I called your mother and told her I needed you to help me with some chores around the barn.”

“Everything looked done to me.”

“It’ll be our little secret,” Grandma said, turning to wink at me.

I smiled. “I’m surprised she agreed. I didn’t go earlier this week either.” This meant that I would probably get a lecture later on skipping church and being unavailable to God. I sighed.

“I’m sure you could use the break,” she said, placing a plate of spaghetti in front of me. Could she know how tied up I felt inside?

“Thanks.”

She joined me at the table with a plate of her own and a basket full of garlic bread, which she placed directly in front of me. I took a piece, not wanting to seem unappreciative of the meal.

“How is school?”

I took a small bite of spaghetti; it was warm and slightly sweet. “Fine.”

“Nothing new going on?”

“Kimber and Cole broke up.”

She smiled. “I’m sure it’s temporary.”

I nodded, not wanting to go into details. I took another bite, and I surprised myself by saying,“We got a new kid.”

“How exciting.”

I shrugged. “He’s in my home economics class.”

Grandma leaned across the table to whisper, “Is he handsome?”

I giggled. “Yes.”

“Have you talked to him?”

My smile faded. “No.” He doesn’t even know I’m alive.

“Maybe you should say hello.”

“Why would he want to talk to me?” I felt embarrassed to say it out loud.

“Why wouldn’t he?”

I shrugged, sorry to have brought up Sam.

Grandma sighed. “You are far more than those scars, Heven.”

My eyes flew to her face. Not many people brought up my face. It was dangerous territory. Instead of getting angry I felt my eyes fill. “I’m hideous.”

“You could never be hideous.”

“Forget it.” I wanted this conversation over.

“I can’t forget it,” Gran said, not giving up so easily. “I don’t like to hear you talk about yourself that way. Your scars do not define you, young lady. Your actions do.”

“It’s hard to act confident when I feel anything but,” I mumbled.

“I know that.” Gran reached across the table and covered my hand with hers. “But hiding from who you are isn’t going to make you feel any better.”

I let my fork fall to my plate. I didn’t want to hide who I was – I just wasn’t sure who that was anymore.

“Pass me the bread,” Gran asked.

It was right next to her, so I figured that was her way of telling me that she was finally going to let it go. Grateful, I passed the bread.

We finished the meal in silence.

The next morning Kimber laid on the horn earlier than usual. I ran down the stairs calling a goodbye to Mom, not even bothering to pretend to have breakfast. As usual I stopped at the big mirror by the front door and forced myself to look up. My blond hair hung over my shoulders and face, concealing as much as it could. It wasn’t as shiny or healthy looking as Before, and my blue eyes were a little dull. I told myself it was because I hadn’t slept well the night before. I never bothered with makeup anymore, but at least my skin was clear. I was dressed in my usual baggy shirt and jeans. Kimber laid on the horn again, and I ran out the door.

“You in a hurry?” I grumped, sliding into the passenger seat.

“You didn’t call me last night,” she accused.

“Sorry.”

“I called you like a hundred times!”

“I was tired. Is something wrong?” I looked over at her. She was dressed just as fierce as always. Her thick red hair tumbled over her shoulders and she was wearing a long knit dress with a bold, colorful print. Her denim jacket was scuffed up and worn in all the right places. She didn’t look like anything was wrong.

“We have been invited to a party this weekend!”

“Great.”

“Ask me who.”

“Whose party is it?”

“Josh Turner’s!”

“The varsity quarterback?” I asked curiously.

“Yes!” She clapped her hands, about to burst.

“Wow.”

“I know, right? It is going to be awesome! His parties are legendary.”