Melancholy

“I made a mistake,” I whisper, placing my hands on his chest. “I fucked up, Maddox. The truth is, I was hurt when you were with Ash because I care about you. It confused me, my feelings confused me, and they still do, but I won’t deny that it hurt because you matter to me more than I first thought. What I did with Alec . . . it was wrong . . . and I paid for it. He took something from me I can’t get back, and the sad thing is I gave it to him. He made it hurt, but I know with you . . . it won’t. Show me, Maddox. Show me what we both can’t say.”

His eyes flash, and the ice in his glass rattles as he reaches out and places it on the small table beside the couch. “There ain’t no takin’ this back. Once I’m inside you, that’s it.”

“Show me,” I whisper. “Make him go away, make it . . . make it you . . .”

“You were a virgin.”

It’s a statement, not a question.

I nod.

“He hurt you?”

I nod again.

“How bad?”

I open my mouth, and my cheeks go pink.

“How bad, baby?” he demands.

“I . . . it hurt . . . it hurt a lot. There was blood, and—”

“Fuck,” he cuts me off. “Can’t fuck you, honey. Not when you’ve been hurt.”

I shake my head. “But . . . Maddox . . . we’ve both wanted this. I want this. With you. I want you to make it feel how it’s supposed to.”

He takes my hand, pressing it down between us and over his . . . holy shit . . . extremely large cock. “You feel that, honey?” he growls. “Ain’t no way that won’t hurt.”

I lean forward, pressing my forehead to his. “Today, tomorrow, or a month away. We can’t change that. I made a mistake with Alec, but I want you, Maddox. I. Want. You.”

He pulls back, his eyes hard. “And I’ll fuck you, just not here. Not tonight. Not when you’re still raw.”

I open my mouth to protest, but he cuts me off.

“I don’t need to fuck you, to make you scream.”

Oh, boy.

I meet his gaze and he gives me a sexy lip quirk that makes me want to lean forward and devour his handsome face.

“Well then,” I breathe. “Take it away.”

His eyes slide over my body, slowly, and when they meet mine again, they’re filled with heat. “Slowly. He fucked up by hurtin’ you, sweetheart. I’m goin’ to show you just how beautiful this can be.”

“O-o-okay,” I whisper.

He lifts a hand, running the backs of his fingers down my cheek, so softly and gently it takes me by surprise. He brings his face closer, puffs of breath warming my cheeks. I close my eyes; just taking him in, letting him show me everything he’s wanted to show me for so long. His fingers continue to stroke down my face, going down my neck and over my shoulder.

Then he replaces his fingers with his lips, and my entire body comes alive. He scatters the softest, sweetest little kisses over my cheeks and face, gently grazing my lips before moving down to my neck. Tiny prickles of pleasure break out over my skin and warmth shoots through me at the feeling of his lips tickling my neck. It feels amazing, and so damned real.

“Your skin smells like honey,” he purrs against my throat, little vibrations travelling through me.

I laugh softly. “It’s the soap I wash with.”

“Mmmmm,” he growls. “Keep washin’ with it.”

His hands move, sliding up my sides. His fingers tickle over my body, warming a path as they go. Then he glides them over my dress, stroking me, caressing the soft swell of my breasts through the fabric. A whimper escapes and his mouth captures mine, giving me a kiss so mind consuming it takes my breath away. It’s so gentle, so perfect...exactly how it should be.

I just didn’t know I could get what I desperately needed from a biker.

He’s being so slow with me, so sweet. His mouth peppers little kisses across my face and neck, his fingers create light touches up my side and over my breasts. My skin is alive, my body is thrumming and it feels amazing. I close my eyes and take it all in, letting him explore my body, letting him bring me alive in a way Alec refused. He’s replacing all the bad Alec put on my body, and replacing it with something beautiful, something Maddox.

“It’s takin’ everything for me to hold back,” he murmurs against my neck. “You’re so damned gorgeous, Santana.”

I shudder and he groans.

“That’s how it should feel, baby,” he growls. “When a man makes you feel something fuckin’ beautiful.”

“You make it feel,” I struggle for breath. “Amazing. I need more, Maddox. I need you, now.”

He brings his mouth forward and captures my lips in his. Like the first time, the kiss is God damned scorching. His tongue moves past my lips and causes mine to go weak, like it’s having it’s own wobbly leg moment. His rubble is scratchy against my cheek in the best possible way.

“Fuck,” he growls, pulling back. “Never has kissin’ anyone felt so damned good.”

I stare at him, just taking him in. He’s so beautiful. I reach up, stroking my fingers over his rugged face. His eyes search mine, for answers, for hope, I don’t know . . . but it feels good. This moment feels exactly how it’s meant to. I slide my hands from his face, down his neck and stop when they’re flat on his chest.

“What’s next?” I breathe.