Mind Game (GhostWalkers #2)(93)
Author: Christine Feehan

She pulled away from him, her expression stubborn. “I didn’t go with you on your job. It will only break my concentration knowing you’re there.”

“You can be angry with me over this,” he said, “and I’ll understand, but it won’t change my mind. I’m being honest with you. It’s impossible for me to do anything else.”

“So what does that mean? Every time I go out on a job, you’re going to be following me because you think I’m not capable of handling it?”

“No, because I’m not capable of handling it. There’s a difference. Can you live with that? With me being who I am?” He caught her arm when she turned away from him. “I’m asking you to understand what I’m really like. I have my own drawbacks, Dahlia. I’m going to be damned difficult to live with sometimes.”

Her eyes widened in shock. In terror. “I didn’t ever agree to live with you.”

“No,” he admitted, “but you’re going to agree.”

“You’re so arrogant, Nicolas. Sometimes it sets my teeth on edge.”

He tried not to smile. “I know it does.” At least she didn’t say she wouldn’t agree to living with him, so maybe when he mentioned marriage, she wouldn’t just faint on him. Or put on her running shoes.

She tossed the pictures on the bed and rummaged through her clothes to find something to wear. Lily had been thoughtful enough to replace everything on the list Nicolas had given her for Dahlia, including her work clothes and tools. Because it was Lily she sent along as many other items she could get quickly and thought would be useful. Dahlia was pleased with the assortment and the tightly woven clothes with a myriad of zippered compartments to store necessary items and keep her hands free.

She slicked her hair back and braided it a second time as tightly as possible. As she slipped her hands into the thin gloves she glanced at Nicolas. “Well? If you’re coming, you’d better get ready.”

“We’ve been ready. Our gear is already in the cars. Do you want a radio?”

She shook her head. “Too distracting. I have to rely on myself, Nicolas. I can’t change how I do things at this late date. When I go in, I have to believe in myself, not think if something happens you can rescue me. I don’t need rescuing. If I’m in trouble, I’ll get myself out.” She pinned him with her black gaze. “Is that understood?”

“Perfectly clear.” He caught up her equipment bag and carried it out of the room.

Dahlia started after him and then went back to look at the photographs scattered across the bed. She picked up one and stared down at it, at the man who had orchestrated the murder of her family. It took a few moments before she realized the temperature in the room was climbing fast and her fingers were burning black holes in the evidence she would need to show the director. She tossed the picture away from her, but sat down on the bed to look at the others. Nearly all of them were taken in the French Quarter in New Orleans. Why did Louise have the pictures?

“Dahlia?” Max stood in the doorway, his piercing blue eyes watching her.

She lifted her chin, drawing in air to calm herself. It was sheer hell being around so many people and trying to guard her emotions. She couldn’t imagine how difficult it was for them to be around her. “What is it, Max?”

“I wanted to say I was sorry. I’ve been thinking a lot about what it must have been like for you and you’re right, I should have told you I knew Dr. Whitney. You know all the problems with the experiment, everything that we suffer using the abilities we have and how difficult it is to block out the people around us. You probably know more than we do.” He tapped his finger on the door. “The thing is, we were warned someone was trying to kill us all. That someone knew about us and had already been killing others like us.” He jerked his chin toward the outer room where the laughter and easy camaraderie of the GhostWalkers could be heard. “Someone definitely killed members of their team, and we didn’t want to be next. We all went deep undercover and buried the information on us through as many layers of red flags as we could. Admiral Henderson helped us out.”

“And you didn’t think that I was in danger?”

“We should have, Dahlia. We should have taken steps to protect you as well.”

She knew she shouldn’t ask. She already knew the answer, but she couldn’t stop herself. “Why didn’t you?”

Max looked down at his hands, closed them into two tight fists before looking her straight in the eye. “We trained together and trusted one another. You were an unknown.

You have powers and complications none of us had, and we didn’t know if we could trust you not to turn on us.”

“You still don’t know that, Max.” It was a knife, she decided. He’d taken a knife and just plunged it through her heart. She wished she could be cold and distant and not feel anything. Hurt was just as dangerous as anger. Getting near people was hazardous and perhaps even perilous for someone like her.

“I do know, Dahlia, and I should have known it months ago. Jesse should have known it. We were wrong. I know that doesn’t help with the way you’re feeling, but I wanted to say it. To at least let you know how I felt.”

She didn’t know whether to thank him or spit in his face. She could only stand there helplessly wondering if it was possible to have a silent meltdown.

“I hope that confession made you feel better, Maxwell,” Nicolas said. His tone was low and mean and sent a shiver down Dahlia’s spine. “No, you didn’t call her a freak or different, but you damn well made her feel that way, didn’t you? And all for what? This little speech was all about making you feel better, not Dahlia. Now you can go home and tell yourself you apologized, and that should make it all right.”

Dahlia turned away from the two men. The air crackled with electricity, the energy suddenly alive and breathing like a monster while the two men faced each other with ice-cold eyes and anger fed by the violence of the gathering storm both inside the house and out.

She pushed past both men, afraid of the flames dancing behind her eyes. Afraid of the anger she felt at Max and Jesse and the admiral. She had spent most of her life learning control, but when surrounded by so many people with such strong emotions, it seemed an impossible task. She nearly ran into Kaden. He caught her shoulders to steady her, and at once, some of the pressure eased.

“Just breathe, Dahlia. Stand outside if you have to. That’s what we do when the overload hits us. You have every right to remove yourself from the situation. Just because you’re in a house with people doesn’t mean you can’t have privacy.”