Music of the Heart (Runaway Train #1)(67)
Author: Katie Ashley

Frustration and anger swirled within me. I swept a hand to my hip. “So just because you have a past and I don’t that means we can’t have sex?”

“Yeah, that’s right.”

“Well, that’s not fair.”

Jake tossed the robe at me. “Life’s not fair, babe. Get used to it.”

I threw the robe back at him, smacking him in the face with it. “No, I won’t. I’m not taking no for an answer!”

He smirked at me. “And just what do you plan to do? Rape me?”

“No, I intend on making love with you.” Stepping forward, I slid my arms around his neck and then pressed my body flush against his. Jake instantly tensed. Before he could push me away, I said, “Even though you don’t believe it, I know you, Jake. I understand that feeling and expressing emotions off the stage is hard for you—I’ve seen you screw-up way too many times, remember? More than anything I understand that now with everything that is going on with your mom and what happened with me, that you’re gun-shy, scared, and unsure of what you’re experiencing and feeling.”

I rubbed the back of my hand across his cheek. “But I want you to listen to me. I love you, Jake. I’ve never loved another guy in my entire life. I’ve given myself over to you emotionally, and I’m more than ready to do that with my body as well. So I don’t care whether I make love with you, have sex, or even f**k.”

His eyes widened as big as saucers at my using the F word. I smiled reassuringly at him. “I just want to be with you.” I pulled his head down to where our foreheads touched. “Not only have you told me over and over again that you loved me, but you’ve managed to show me just how much you love me too. I don’t care if you’ve been with a thousand other women—that was the past. We’re the present and the future—right here and right now.”

Jake made a pained noise in the back of his throat. “Can’t you see I’m f**king drowning in all this guilt?” He smacked his hand against his bare chest. “It’s because of me that you were almost killed. I don’t want anything else on my conscience, so I won’t ruin you by taking your virginity.”

I couldn’t help rolling my eyes. “Would you stop talking like I’m some fragile flower or something? I may be fifty percent angel, but I’m fifty percent hellcat too.” I curled my fingers into his sweat slickened strands of hair. “I’ll be your holy water—I’ll purify you and wash away the past. Just don’t deny me this.”

“Angel, I don’t ever want to deny you anything. I’d give you the world if I could. It kills me inside to have to tell you no.” He wrapped his arms tight around me. “It’s just I’m so afraid that my love can never be good enough for you.”

“Don’t ever think that, Jake. It’s all I need—all I want.” I gazed up at him. “Besides, you may be with me and decide I’m not enough for you.”

He shook his head. “I f**king doubt that.”

“But I don’t know what to do…to you know, please you.”

Jake grinned down at me. “Please me?”

I felt my cheeks warming. “Get you off?”

His thumb rubbed across my cheekbone. “Babe, I doubt you’ll have any problems getting me off. You did just fine last time.”

“But you were helping me. I just want to be everything you could ever need and more both in and out of the bedroom.”

Jake then brought his lips to mine and silenced any remaining doubts. His tongue slid against my lips, and I opened my mouth, inviting him in. I wanted to taste every inch of him tonight. Our kisses deepened as our tongues danced and fought against each other.

With our mouths and arms entangled, I used my h*ps to nudge Jake toward the loft steps. I wasn’t going to give him another chance to talk me or himself out of this. When his butt knocked against the stairs, his lips pulled away from mine. His signature cocky smirk spread across his lips. “Ladies first.”

I giggled. “Why do I think this is less about you being chivalrous and more about getting to see my ass in this thong?”

He banged his head back against the railing. “Christ almighty, that sexy-as-hell-get-up has a thong too?”

“Mmm hmm.”

A sexy grin stretched across his face. “You’re killing me.” He then stepped aside for me to start up the stairs. With every step I took, I could feel his eyes scorching into my bare skin. It caused heat and moisture to grow between my thighs.

When we reached the landing of the loft, I started to wrap my arms around Jake, but he stopped me. “Wait, Angel, I’m all sweaty from working out, and I stink.”

I leaned in to inhale his bare chest. “You smell good to me.”

Jake chuckled as he pushed out of my arms. “If we’re doing this, we’re doing it right and when I’m not stinky.”

“If you say so,” I replied.

Tugging my hand, he pulled me to the bathroom. Just like everything in the barn, it was breathtaking with its marble tile and granite countertops. Jake turned on the shower knob, and a steady stream of water came jetting out. With his hands on the waistband of his shorts, his lips curved in a smirk. “Did you plan on joining me or just watching?”

“Um…” Did I want to shower with him? That threw me for a loop since that usually came after sex, right? Ugh, this was all happening wrong and not like I pictured it. And I sure as hell didn’t think it would be romantic to watch him shower. The sight of Jake lathering up while I stared at him sounded like something out of a bad  p**n o. “Uh, I can just wait in the bed.” I then started inching back from the shower.

He was sliding his shorts down when I quickly turned to go. I didn’t make it far before he grabbed my arm and spun me into him. I squealed as the water drenched my hair and soaked my lingerie. “Don’t go, Angel. I want you to stay.”

At the desire and love that burned in his eyes, I found it hard to breathe. When I could finally speak, I replied, “Then I’ll stay.”

Jake glanced down at my wet nightie that was now molded to my body like a second skin. “You really bought this for me?”

“Yes,” I replied as my arms went around his neck. “Do you like it?”

“Hmm,” he murmured as his hands came up to cup my br**sts within the bodice. “It’s beautiful—you’re beautiful in it.”