Nerds Like It Hot (Nerds, #6)(18)
Author: Vicki Lewis Thompson

Smiling at his own wit, he searched for number 106. If Jared Stevenson the Third wasn’t waiting in there, hyperventilating at the thought of a visit from Nancy Roth, then Neil would give up his entire collection of sex toys. And he wasn’t about to do that.

There was an actual doorbell next to the door, but Neil thought that was pretentious. A meeting such as this required a soft rap on the door, so that’s what he did.

The door opened almost immediately, and Jared stood there, literally panting. He’d ditched the navy blazer and stood there in—Neil had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing—a burgundy silk smoking jacket. "Nancy! You came!"

"May it be the first of many times." Neil looked to see if Jared got the double entendre, but it had obviously been lost on him.

"Indeed!" Jared smiled, revealing teeth that only an orthodontist could love. What an oversized set of choppers. "I hope this is the first of many rendezvouses."

Neil managed not to shudder. Jared knew just enough French to be dangerous. "That’s my hope, too." He batted his fake eyelashes. "I brought us a few things to enjoy." He held up the bottle of wine, a banana, and an apple. The apple was a joke that only he would be able to appreciate in the course of the evening, but then, this was mostly about him, wasn’t it?

"Welcome to my little part of the ship." Jared swept an arm to encompass a place that was easily twice as big as the dinky little cabin Neil shared with BJ. The bed looked king-sized, not that they’d be needing that for what Neil had in mind. There was also a sitting room and a sizable bathroom, from what he could see.

"It must be nice to be you," Neil said.

"I’m not so sure. Do you know what it’s like to be the only one around who gets it?"

Neil nodded. "Trust me, I know exactly what it’s like."

"I’m a member of Mensa, and yet nobody wants to give me any control. Does that make sense? I have more brains than all of them put together!"

"It must be frustrating." Neil could imagine the Stevenson family in a panic over how to manage this clueless guy who thought he knew everything.

"You have no idea. But enough of that. Shall we open that wine you brought?"

"My thoughts, exactly."

Jared’s eyes gleamed. "I knew from the minute we talked on the phone that you and I were in sync. We understand each other."

"I believe that’s true." Neil waited while Jared uncorked the wine, poured them each a glass, and drained his. It was good wine, which made the gulping even more of a travesty. But getting Jared a little tipsy served Neil’s purposes. "Another glass?"

"Why not?" Jared splashed more of the wine into his goblet and drained that one, too. He was either eager or nervous. Maybe both. "You’re not drinking much," he said.

"I had champagne at dinner. I’m still feeling it." A total lie.

"You moved to Cora’s table, didn’t you?" Jared poured himself more wine. "An old friend of the family, Cora is. I helped her out with some room arrangements."

"Really?" This might be news he could use.

"She wanted a couple of her friends, two nerds with no social skills, to be in the stateroom next to hers. I saw no harm in it, so I made the arrangements."

‘That would be Lex and Dante?" Neil didn’t see either one of them as true nerds. Lex might be more so than Dante, but outfits did not a nerd make.

‘That’s right!" Jared’s pointy finger wobbled a little as he jabbed it in Neil’s direction. "Give that man a prize."

"I know what my prize would be, if I could have anything I wanted."

"Well, you can have anything you want, Nancy!" Jared leered at Neil. "You are so hot."

Neil sauntered closer, swinging his h*ps as he went. Then he leaned in for a kiss, which totally reduced Jared to a puddle. "I want you nak*d," he murmured.

"Oh, God." Jared couldn’t get his clothes off fast enough. Soon he stood in the middle of the room like a giant pink baby with an erection. The man had zero muscle definition except for the prominent display between his legs. "Now what? Will you get nak*d, too?"

"Not this time, Jared, honey." Neil had decided to wait to reveal his little secret. First he wanted Jared to be completely under his spell. After tonight, he would be. "First Nancy’s going to give you a spanking. You know you need one."

Jared’s eyes bulged. "Uh, well, I—"

Neil positioned himself on the sitting room couch and patted his knee. "Come here. Nancy’s going to turn you over her knee. It’s what you deserve, you bad boy."

With a bleating sort of moan, Jared did as he was told. His rigid penis fit between Neil’s thighs, his pink butt shone rosy in the lamplight, and his head and arms hung toward the floor. Combined with the wine he’d drunk so fast, he must be dizzy as a daisy in the wind. So much the better.

Neil wasn’t hugely into S and M, but there was a certain amount of excitement in slapping his open palm against that quivering butt until the skin turned red. Judging from Jared’s moans, the cruise director was into it. When Neil decided the time was right, he jammed the banana up Jared’s ass. Jared came immediately, bellowing out his gratitude. That was the moment when Neil stuck the apple in Jared’s open mouth.

The crunch of those teeth on the apple nearly brought Neil off, but he controlled the urge. A person didn’t want to give in to a climactic urge while fully taped. When he stood, Jared thumped to the floor and lay there, an apple in one end and a banana in the other. Fruit cocktail.

Neil took his leave. He was reasonably certain that Jared had never had an evening quite like this one. He would want more, and Neil assumed he wouldn’t much care whether Neil was a cross-dresser or an orangutan, so long as Neil could deliver the goodies.

And the more goodies Jared wanted, the more blackmailable he became. Neil hadn’t counted on a situation such as Jared presented, but he wasn’t about to pass up the opportunity now that it had presented itself.

The lights were back on for the quiz part of the astronomy lecture. Eventually BJ would return to the room, probably wanting a gab fest. Neil planned to change into his designer nightwear before she arrived, and then he’d gab as far into the night as she wanted. She was his cover, and he wasn’t about to mess with that.

BY THE TIME THE LIGHTS CAME UP, LEX HAD HELPED Gillian straighten her clothes and she was once again lying on her own lounge chair. She’d even located her glasses, which had dropped to the deck sometime during the action. When she put them on and glanced at him with a secret smile, he fought the urge to suggest they go below and hang a DO NOT DISTURB sign on his cabin door.

If he did that, he knew he’d never be able to explain it to Dante, not after the lecture he’d given Dante about getting mixed up with a client. Lex had to talk with Dante and admit his failings, and soon, because Dante was no dope. He’d figure things out.

Lex glanced over to where Dante and BJ were snuggled on the same lounge chair. Dante caught Lex’s eye and gave him a thumbs-up. Lex wasn’t sure whether to return the signal or not. Returning it could mean that he’d spent the lecture period making out, too. Although he had, he wasn’t ready to advertise it. So he gave Dante a noncommittal wave.

"Who’re you waving at?" Gillian asked.

"Dante."

Gillian craned her neck to look and then settled back with a smile. "They look cozy. Are you sure we need to stay in our own chairs?"

"I think it’s a good idea for several reasons."

"So there’s reason number one and reason number two?"

"At least."

"Are you going to tell me what they are?"

"Nope." His main reason was her current lack of panties. No way could he cuddle without reacting to that private knowledge.

Secondly, he wasn’t ready to advertise their new status to Dante. Fortunately, Dante was too involved with BJ to notice anything unusual about Gillian. She looked a little rumpled and flushed, but her makeup was still perfect. He couldn’t get over that mystery. Except for the wet spot on his jacket, which he’d folded inside so it wouldn’t show, and her panties in his pocket, there was no real evidence of what had happened.

That didn’t change the fact that Lex had succumbed to temptation. He could tell himself that it wouldn’t happen again, but he wouldn’t believe it. Knowing someone as beautiful as Gillian was hot for him had seriously compromised his moral stance. Considering what had just taken place, he thought she might actually welcome a suggestion that he go with her to South America.

Consequently, at this point he was making bargains with himself. The argument went something like this— his job was to keep Gillian from harm. In order to do that, he had to stay physically close to her. Because of their sexual chemistry, that closeness naturally led to activities such as they’d recently enjoyed. Such activities could be allowed if, and only if, there was no immediate danger.

He pictured himself making that argument to Dante. Then he pictured Dante falling on the floor in a fit of hysterics. Okay, so Lex’s recently minted argument made mincemeat of the Don’t get involved with clients rule.

Too bad he’d ever said such a dumb thing, but it had sounded reasonable at the time. Now he’d have to put up with Dante’s ridicule. Given a choice between Dante’s ridicule and never touching Gillian’s br**sts again, Lex would take the ridicule.

Maybe he’d tell Dante his eventual plan of going with Gillian when she jumped ship. No, he’d better not say anything about that yet. Dante might not take well to losing his partner so early in their PI career. Lex would have to think of how to make that up to him. For one thing, he could have all of Cora’s fee.

Gillian nudged his lounge chair. "The first question to the starlight trivia quiz is up on the screen. Partners are allowed to share answers. What’s the name of Pluto’s moon?"

Because he’d missed most of Little Ben’s lecture, Lex had to dig into his memory. "Charon."

"Thanks!" Gillian scribbled in her notebook. "I’ll turn in the answers for both of us."

"You’re trying to win another prize?" "Sure, why not?"

"Because we didn’t listen to the lecture, in case you’ve forgotten."

Her smile told him she’d forgotten nothing. "How do you know I wasn’t multitasking?"

"If you heard that lecture …" He paused and leaned closer. "Then I deserve a failing grade in sexual stimulation."

"Actually, I’d give you an A, even a weighted A. I totally missed the lecture, but we both aced our astronomy classes, so I’ll bet if we pool our resources, we can win."

If that meant he’d get to lean close to her and look into those big brown eyes, he was in. "Okay."

"Good. I’ve got the next one covered. The giant volcano on Mars is Mount Olympus."

"Good thing you knew that. My brain’s still fried. By the way, what’s the prize?"

"I don’t even know." She filled in their answer. "I just love any kind of trivia. Don’t you?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I do." And in that moment, he knew exactly what Dante had been trying to explain when he’d said that, bam, he knew he’d found the one. On the face of it, that kind of certainty made no sense. So far all Lex knew was that both he and Gillian loved sex and trivia. Logically that wasn’t enough to base a lifetime on. And yet, here under a summer night of stars, it seemed like more than enough.

"I CAN’T BELIEVE LEX TURNED OUT TO BE AN ARIES!

I knew Aries men and Cancer women weren’t a good match, but I had no idea it was so bad. Maybe I’ve been kidding myself that we’re compatible." Gillian followed Cora into their shared cabin.

"Don’t let astrology ruin a good thing." She picked up a piece of a paper lying on her pillow. "Here’s our schedule for tomorrow."

Gillian wasn’t interested in the schedule. "But do Lex and I really have a good thing? You heard him just now when we were arguing in the hall. He thinks astrology is bogus. He’s completely closed his mind to the—"

"Of course he has. Astrology is telling him you two aren’t meant for each other, and he doesn’t want to hear it. That’s a compliment, if you ask me. He wants that connection." She glanced at the schedule. "Oh, look! A limbo contest."

"All he really wants is sex."

Cora laughed. "That’s the case with ninety-nine percent of the male population. First comes sex, then comes marriage, then comes the bambino in the baby carriage."

"When you put it that way, I suppose it was stupid for us to argue about it. Whatever we have isn’t going to amount to marriage and bambinos, considering my future plans, but still, I was enjoying the moment."

"So keep enjoying it."

Gillian sighed. "I suppose, but now I’ll be looking for things like his lack of a romantic attitude, whereas I’m all about romance. How can I be involved with a man who doesn’t have a romantic bone in his body?"

"Get interested in a different bone." Cora took out her diamond earrings and dropped them into the jewelry box on the dresser.

"Cora!"

"Hey, sweetheart, I’m old, but I’m not dead. In fact, I’m wondering if I would throw my back out if I tried the limbo. I used to love that." "I need romance."

"I’ll bet Lex could do romance if you let him know that’s what you need."

"You think?" Gillian sat on her bed. "Name one romantic thing he’s ever done."

"That would be difficult considering he’s never tried to woo me."

"He hasn’t tried to woo me, either. It’s just been … convenient." And she was the one who’d suggested what happened tonight. She’d been the one bewitched by the stars and the warm night. "Look at Dante and BJ. They’re probably still strolling around the deck together. His Libra goes great with her Gemini. And your Leo goes even better with Little Ben’s Gemini. You two are the perfect match."

"I do think it might work out. Ballroom dancing might be a little awkward, but I suppose he could stand on my feet, like one of those dancing dolls."

"Cora, he’s not that short."

"He’s pretty short. But dancing isn’t everything. Hey, I wonder if he can limbo?"