Nerds Like It Hot (Nerds, #6)(25)
Author: Vicki Lewis Thompson

"They didn’t answer the room phone?"

Lex clipped the walkie-talkie to his belt. "No. So keep your fingers crossed they’re relaxing on a deck chair somewhere on this ship." He grabbed her hand and headed inside to the elevators.

Three guys and two women waited by the elevator, each of them watching the flashing numbers. None of them were paired up, and Gillian had to admit they all fit the geek stereotype—smudged glasses, mismatched clothes, and bed-head. Judging from their relaxed stance, they were totally unconcerned about how they looked.

"Like, beam me up, Scotty," said one guy who held up his hand, middle two fingers spread in the Star Trek Dr. Spock greeting. "Somebody needs to reprogram the system that runs these elevators."

"Or put booster rockets on them," said his friend.

"I knew a guy who did that," said a girl who was wearing glasses with the earpiece taped on. "Sent the elevator through the roof."

"Really?" The Star Trek fan moved in her direction. "Cool! Uh, what’s your name?"

Gillian didn’t hear any of the rest of the conversation, because the elevator arrived heading down, which was the direction she and Lex wanted to go. All five nerds groaned. They obviously were headed up to the continental breakfast on A Deck. As Gillian stepped into the empty elevator with Lex, she hoped the Star Trek guy and the taped-earpiece girl got together.

Just as the elevator door started to close, she saw a man in a luau shirt hurry toward it. Her first reaction was to reach for the button to hold the door.

"Don’t," Lex said.

Then she recognized the man who’d just missed the elevator, and her blood chilled. "It was him. The guy from the karaoke bar."

"Yeah. I didn’t want to scare you, but he’s been shadowing us for a while."

She turned to him, her heart thumping. "And he tried to get on the elevator with us. Do you … do you think he’s armed?"

"I don’t know how someone would smuggle a gun on board."

"In pieces, that’s how! They disassemble it so on the X-ray it doesn’t look like a gun."

Lex shook his head. "With the kind of security we have these days, I’d be amazed if even that worked. I’m not saying it’s impossible, but it would be chancy, and if he’s who we think, he wouldn’t want to risk getting picked up."

"So how’s he going to do it?"

Lex gazed at her. "Look, we don’t know that he’s Mafia. He might be a nerd with an Italian name who’s looking for the love of his life."

"But you think he might have been following us."

"It’s possible." The elevator clunked to a stop at D Deck and Lex took her hand again. "Come on. Let’s go look for Cora."

"But if he doesn’t have a gun, how’s he going to do it? I mean, suppose he trapped us in the elevator, or trapped us anywhere, for that matter. He still has to deal with both of us."

"Exactly. He could be hoping for a time when you’re by yourself. That’s why you need to stay right by me." He pushed through the double doors onto the open deck.

As a blast of warm, salty air engulfed them, she thought of how great this would be if she weren’t thinking she’d be murdered any minute. She clutched Lex’s hand tighter. "You really think he’s the hit man, don’t you?"

"I don’t know. But we’re not going to give him a chance to prove it, one way or the other."

"I appreciate that." She took a deep breath. The ocean and salt air were supposed to have a calming effect, but she wasn’t feeling the bliss. "Man, I hope we find Cora soon. Between the Mafia guy and Cora going missing, my in-sides are churning like a washing machine on spin cycle."

"Yeah, I’m not all that cool, myself." Lex paused to glance up and down the covered deck area. The chairs lined up there were all empty. "Damn."

"When we find her, I’m going to give her such a talking-to."

"You and me both." He gazed upward at the row of lifeboats hanging there, each covered in a bright orange tarp. "Omigod. You don’t suppose she and Little Ben are having a Titanic moment."

"Lex! The guy in the Titanic stood on the prow of the ship! Please tell me that isn’t what you meant."

"No. Look at that lifeboat."

"Which lifeboat?" She saw a bunch of them hanging there above their heads, right over the railing and ready to be launched if necessary. In general, Gillian didn’t like to spend too much time looking at lifeboats, especially in a discussion that had recently included Titanic.

"See the one that’s rocking?"

She looked more closely, and sure enough, one of the lifeboats in the middle of the row was swaying slightly. "It could be the motion of the ship doing that." She didn’t really want to think about any other possibility.

"Then they’d all be swaying. They’re not. Just that one. Let’s go closer." Before he started toward it, though, he glanced over his shoulder. "Shit."

"The man in the luau shirt?"

"Yeah. He’s sitting in a deck chair pretending to read a newspaper."

"Maybe he’s not pretending." Gillian wanted desperately to believe that. "Maybe he’s really reading it."

"You keep an eye on him while we walk down and investigate that lifeboat. See if he changes his position."

As they walked, Gillian kept glancing back. The man didn’t move except to turn the pages of his newspaper. "He’s just reading it. That’s all."

"I just thought of why that’s so strange."

"Lex, there’s nothing strange about it. People do it all the time."

"Not on board a cruise ship. They don’t sell a metropolitan daily here. Think about it. Is a helicopter going to fly over and drop a load of newspapers on deck?"

"So he brought it with him to read."

"Or he brought it as a prop, but he’s not up on cruises and didn’t realize it would stand out like a sore thumb."

Gillian moaned. "You are scaring me to death."

"Sorry." He gave her hand a squeeze. "Don’t worry. I’m right here." Then he lowered his voice. "See where the orange tarp has been unlaced?"

Gillian looked, and sure enough, the cover had been loosened. "How would someone do that?"

"Stand on a deck chair, maybe. Or I suppose a person could climb on the railing and manage it. Sheesh, talk about crazy."

"Cora wouldn’t have done that."

"I don’t know. She keeps in shape."

"Yes, but I can’t picture her swinging up from the railing in order to get in there." Gillian really didn’t want Cora to be in that lifeboat.

"Maybe she didn’t, but someone did. Be very quiet and listen. Tell me what you hear coming from that lifeboat."

Gillian was still thinking about the guy with the newspaper, so she found it tough to listen carefully while her heart was pounding so loud. But eventually she made out a rhythmic slapping noise, combined with what could very well be heavy breathing. The whimpers and groans only added to the obvious conclusion. She looked at Lex.

He raised both eyebrows. "Sound familiar?" he murmured.

In circumstances such as these, she had no business getting turned on. But after all, she was holding the hand of the person who had recently shared that very activity with her. "Umm, yeah."

"We have to do something about it. That’s very dangerous."

A terrible thought came to her, one that completely drowned any flickering flame of passion. "What if it is Cora and Little Ben?" She wanted to cover her ears and run away.

"All the more reason. Those two old people could kill themselves, not to mention getting thrown off the ship."

"Literally?" Gillian pictured Cora and Little Ben walking the plank, blindfolded, with sharks below, jaws open.

"No, of course not. They’d be put off when we dock and have to fly back to L.A. at their own expense."

"What are you going to do?"

"Rap on the side of the lifeboat."

"Can I leave now?"

"No." He glanced down toward the man reading his newspaper. "Not with Hector Michelangelo right there, watching your every move."

"But this is so embarrassing." He smiled. "Nobody’s ever died of embarrassment before."

She swallowed and gazed up at the swaying lifeboat. "That’s what you say." Closing her eyes, she prayed that Cora and Little Ben weren’t the people making that boat move.

Nineteen

LEX WASN’T LOOKING FORWARD TO ROUSTING OUT the lifeboat lovers, either. If it turned out to be Cora in there, he’d be pissed. Blaming it on Little Ben would help the situation, but if Lex knew Cora at all, it could have been her idea.

Still, the woman was eighty-two, for God’s sake. She didn’t need to be doing the horizontal Macarena in a lifeboat. Taking a deep breath, he reached up and rapped sharply on the side of the fiberglass hull.

If he’d expected an instant response, he wasn’t getting one. Instead the slapping rhythm became faster and the moans more frantic.

Gillian leaned close to him. "Maybe you should let them finish."

He stared at her. "Finish?"

"You know." She raised her glance to the lifeboat, which was swinging more vigorously. "Finish."

"I know perfectly well what you mean. What if all that movement tears something loose?"

"Oh, I don’t think so. I realize they’re both pretty old, but even at their age, their body parts should hold together during sex."

Lex was losing patience. His nerves were on edge, anyway, and thinking of someone he cared about taking chances like this didn’t help at all. "I meant what if something comes loose on the lifeboat."

"Oh."

"What if the rigging gives way and the whole thing comes crashing down? It could fall all the way to the water. They could kill themselves. This isn’t about orgasms, it’s about safety!"

"All right, then."

As Lex raised his hand to bang on the lifeboat again, a little shriek was followed closely by a long, drawn-out groan. Then the lifeboat was still.

Lex sighed and glanced at Gillian. "Now can I get them the hell out of there?"

"Yes, but don’t be too rough on them. You know how it is."

"No, I don’t know how it is. I have never contemplated climbing into a lifeboat hanging three stories above the waterline so that I could do the wild thing. That’s insanity. As it is, they’re getting a huge break because I’m the one catching them instead of a crew member."

"True. Cross your fingers it isn’t anyone we recognize."

"Trust me, I’m doing exactly that. Although at least then we’d know where Cora is." He rapped loudly on the boat. "Party’s over!"

Scurrying sounds came from inside and the boat trembled. Eventually a head poked out from under the orange tarp. Lex sighed with relief. It wasn’t anyone he knew.

A young guy with hair sticking out at all angles peered down at them. "Are you, like, with the cruise line?"

Lex gestured toward his khaki pants and plaid shirt. "Do I look like I am?"

"I don’t know. I can’t see very well without my glasses." Just then a hand snaked out from under the tarp and held up a pair of glasses. "Oh, thanks, Emily."

"Irwin!" squealed the woman in the lifeboat. "Did you have to say my name?"

"Sorry, Emily."

"You said it againl"

"Oh. Yeah, I did." Irwin put on his glasses and peered down. "Whoa. This looks a lot scarier in the daylight."

"You need to get down before someone comes along and catches you," Lex said.

"Yeah, I know." Irwin grinned. "We heard you rap the first time, but Emily was so … you know . . . close."

"Irwin. You’re mortifying me."

Irwin peered into the boat. "It’s okay. People don’t talk about sex enough. It’s a natural bodily function. It wasn’t your fault that you couldn’t cli**x the first couple of times."

Emily moaned. "I’m never coming out. I’ll live the rest of my life in this boat. Which is appropriate because it’s a lifeboat. Ha, ha."

"Come on out, Emily," Gillian said. "I’ve been in embarrassing situations myself. You live through it. And Lex is right. If the crew catches you in there, you’re in big trouble."

"Okay," Irwin said. "We’ve almost put ourselves back together."

"How did you get up there?" Lex asked.

"Used the railing.” Irwin surveyed the situation. "But I didn’t realize it was so far down to the water from here. And we’d had a few drinks. I don’t know what they were called, but they were blue. And tasty."

"Tell you what," Lex said. "I’ll stand under you, and you can step on my shoulders. You come first, and then we’ll get Emily out."

"I appreciate that, man. Just let me get my pants on." A zipper rasped. "All set. Emily, are you good to go?"

"Only if somebody has a bag I can put over my head."

Lex felt sorry for her, but now that he knew Cora wasn’t up there, he’d started worrying again. Where could she be? So far he’d heard nothing from Dante. But he had to finish this rescue operation before he and Gillian could keep looking.

Irwin climbed out first. He didn’t weigh much, so Lex had no trouble supporting him on his shoulders. Once Irwin was on the deck, Lex turned back for Emily.

She poked her head out, her red hair looking like it had been styled in a wind tunnel, her freckles almost obliterated by her deep blush. She looked down, and the blood drained from her face. "Yikes," she said softly. "I’m afraid of heights."

"You weren’t afraid at five this morning," Irwin said. "Remember? You, Tarzan. Me, Jane."

"You, drunk. Me, drunker, is more like it, Irwin. Nobody’s afraid when they’re blitzed."

Lex held up his arms. "Take hold of my hands and stand on my shoulders."

"He’s very strong," Gillian said. "He can lift a mattress over his head. You’ll be safe."

Lex snorted. Trust Gillian to bring up the mattress thing. She was probably subtly reminding him not to lecture these horny little nerds. Well, he wouldn’t lecture them. They’d scared themselves so much he didn’t think they’d try this stunt again.