One Good Cowboy(16)
Author: Catherine Mann

* * *

Five hours later, in Vermont, Johanna’s brain was still spinning with confusion after how close she’d come to sleeping with Stone again.

Sleeping? More like unraveling in his arms at just one touch.

At least she had the distraction of a picnic lunch with the Donavan family while she gathered her thoughts. She and Stone had brought Gem along to meet them, while the other three dogs unwound in a fenced area around the guesthouse where Stone and Johanna would be staying tonight.

The late lunch with the Donavan family was an intriguing surprise. Johanna sat at a rustic picnic table while Hillary Donavan pushed her snoozing infant son in a baby swing under a sprawling sugar maple tree. Hillary was so down-to-earth she could have been Johanna’s redheaded cousin, complete with freckles and a high swinging ponytail. Johanna felt at ease, something she hadn’t expected once she’d heard who they would be visiting first.

Hillary’s husband was every bit as approachable in spite of his notorious history as the Robin Hood hacker. Wearing a fedora with his khaki shorts and T-shirt, Troy ran alongside Stone playing fetch with Gem in a field of red clover.

The Donavan homestead was as understated as the couple. A 1920s farmhouse perched on a low rolling hill. A porch wrapped around the first floor and black shutters bracketed the windows.

Bit by bit she saw the amenities added into the landscape so artfully she’d barely noticed. A pool nestled near a wooded area with rock ledges and a waterfall gave it the appearance of a stream feeding into a pond—a clear, chlorinated pond. A child’s playhouse had been built from wood under a massive tree. A security fence enclosed the entire two-acre property—which enabled her to check a box on the adoption application. A lab like Gem would need a safe place to run out her energy with this wonderful family.

She sipped her iced tea, finally beginning to relax now that part one of their mission appeared to be a success. The lunch together had been just what Johanna needed to unwind after the tension of the past twenty-four hours. The meal had been beyond delicious without being overly elaborate. A juicy fruit salad accompanied loaves of hearty peasant bread and deli meats, cheeses and spreads of their choice. Fresh-squeezed lemonade. And the ice cream… Her mouth watered as she finished off another bite of fresh maple walnut ice cream. These parents were clearly trying to give their child as normal a life as possible, given little T.J.—Troy Junior—was the offspring of one of the wealthiest men in the world.

Hillary wrapped her arms around her knees as she hitched her feet up onto the bench by the redwood picnic table. “We appreciate you going to so much trouble to bring Gem to us. He’s such a great dog, playful but well trained.”

“Thank you for letting us invade your home. We could have met in a park or somewhere generic for you to see Gem.”

“I loved time at the park as a child, but I’m still nervous about taking T.J. out in public for security reasons.” Hillary’s hand fell protectively to stroke the baby’s head.

The Donavan compound clearly had top-of-the-line security that could rival Fort Knox, including computerized keypads discreetly hidden and staff that could have doubled as bouncers. Johanna had never thought about the safety issue with Stone’s upbringing. How difficult it must have been for his family to balance all that wealth with values. He’d clearly been born into a vast dynasty, but he had a strong work ethic. She’d always admired that about him.

Apparently, the Donavans felt the same.

“Well, Hillary, I have to say this is definitely more comfy than a park. It’s generous of you to host us overnight.”

The thought of being alone with Stone tonight was starting to sink in. Her skin tingled at the notion.

Hillary’s gaze scanned the low rolling hills around their home. “We bought this place to give T.J. the kind of upbringing neither of us had.”

Johanna angled her head to the side. “Where did you grow up?”

“Here in Vermont actually, but much more scaled back and…well…not secure.” She looked back at Johanna. “I love my mom, but she was troubled. Actually, she was an alcoholic. It took us a long time to reconcile, but I’m glad we found a way to make peace before she passed.”

“Oh, um, I’m sorry you had to go through that,” she said, feeling totally inadequate. Sorry was such a lame, overused word. “Is the rest of your family still nearby?”

“My sister, yes. Troy and I have extended family, as well, the kinds of friends that are as close as relatives. We visit each other as often as we can, but we all bought vacation homes in Monte Carlo so our kids can have a sense of growing up together like cousins.”

Hillary’s shoulders lost much of their tension at the mention of her husband’s close friends, and she launched into a story about their most recent trip to Monaco for a Formula One racing event.

The baby boy squawked awake in his swing, stopping Hillary midstory. With already expert hands, she scooped up her newborn and declared, “He needs changing and I didn’t bring enough diapers out here. If you’ll excuse me for a few minutes, I’ll be right back.”

“Of course. Take your time. I’m enjoying the sunshine.” And trying so very hard not to be envious of Hillary’s glowing happiness.

As if to rub salt in the wound in her aching heart, Troy noticed his wife’s departure and took off after her in a slow jog, Gem loping alongside him having already transferred his doggy allegiance to the Donavans.

Stone peeled away and strode back toward her, so damn handsome he took her breath away. Yet she knew even if he turned gray and paunchy, the essence of the man would be the same.

Strong. Driven. Accomplished. Charismatic.

And still determined to deny himself—both of them—the family happiness she craved. As much as she wanted him, she couldn’t bring herself to settle for less than everything.

* * *

Taking a seat beside Johanna at the picnic table, Stone saw the wistfulness in her eyes as she watched the family tableau. He knew, without question, he’d put that pain there. Guilt threatened to drive him to his knees.

This whole afternoon of domestic bliss had been tough for him, as well, reminding him of all the times he’d seen his cousins with their parents while he sat on the periphery. He’d moved past wanting that for himself and realized he was better off not inflicting the same disappointment on offspring of his own. He knew his limitations. He didn’t have the emotional capacity to be a parent, and he refused to let down a kid. A parent had to be 100 percent in. Otherwise it wasn’t fair to the child. Johanna would expect—and deserved—to have a spouse every bit as committed to home and hearth as she was, rather than some stonehearted guy with a crack baby past.