One Good Cowboy(18)
Author: Catherine Mann

“You care about both of us,” he realized. How much did she care about Alex? Was she holding back?

“Of course I care about you both.” Her hand stayed on his. Did she know her thumb stroked along his wrist? “I practically grew up on the ranch with both of you. In fact, I played more with Alex and Amie since they’re younger than you. Of course I spent a lot more time studying you because of my monster crush. Sometimes it amazes me how I can know so much about you in some ways and so little in others.”

He flipped his hand over to grip hers. “We saw what we wanted to see.”

“I know you and Alex are as close as brothers. The last thing I want to do is cause trouble between you.”

“We don’t always see eye to eye on everything, but we’re close. We’ll get through this, too.” The thought of losing any more of his family was beyond considering. “We grew up like brothers.”

Except they weren’t, in spite of all the times he’d wished they could be.

“You guys definitely had troublemaker moments.” She grinned, lightening the mood and taking them back to safer ground. “Remember when the two of you put Kool-Aid in Amie’s showerhead right before the Miss Stampede Queen pageant? I didn’t think she would ever forgive either of you for turning her hair pink.”

“That was Alex’s idea.”

“Um, I don’t think so. And if it was, that’s probably because you whispered the idea in his ear when he was sleeping.”

Or because he’d left a gag book open to a particular page right on Alex’s desk. Stone grinned. “I may have instigated some—okay, most of the pranks.” He recognized her attempt to get off the subject and he didn’t intend to lose sight of what he needed to know.

“Both of you were fantasy material for all my school friends—rich, sexy cowboys. What’s not to drool over?” Mischief sparkled in her eyes. “But as you know, my crush was firmly placed on you.”

“What about now?”

The pool filter kicked on, the fountain spewing higher. He looked over his shoulder and found staff clearing away the dishes discreetly. Once they left, Johanna leaned toward him again.

“You and I are not engaged anymore, and our core reason for the breakup hasn’t changed. You know that,” she said gently but firmly.

“Yet, we were kissing a few hours ago.” Kissing and more.

She pulled her hand back. “This kind of conversation is exactly what I wanted to avoid.”

“If I weren’t in the picture, would you and Alex be together?” He hated the way this discussion made him feel, the jealousy, the doubts. But damn it, he couldn’t let it go.

Her lips went tight with frustration for an instant. “I’ve already told you I’m not seeing Alex.”

“I heard you.” He remembered everything she’d ever said to him. “I’m asking if you have romantic feelings for him. That’s different.”

She shoved to her feet, walking absently toward the trunk of the maple tree before glancing back over her shoulder. “You’re not going to let this go, are you?”

“You broke up with me, not the other way around.” And the days following that breakup had been some of the darkest in his life.

“Your cousin and I are very much alike.” She sagged against the trunk. “Too much so to be a couple.”

His shoulders dropped with relief. “I’m glad to hear that….” He stood and walked to her, grabbing a branch just over her head. “Even though I know I have no rights, the thought of you being with him drives me crazy.”

“Is that why you made a move on me at my place, in your office—on the plane?”

“I kissed you because I wanted to.” Like now.

“And that’s the first time you’ve wanted to in seven months?”

“Hell, no.” He thought about having her every day—and every night.

“Then something changed to make you act on the impulse. Is that ‘something’ jealousy?” Her eyes searched him with genuine confusion. “If you can’t have me, no one can?”

Put that way, he sounded like a jerk. “I don’t know how to explain it other than to say that since my grandmother dropped her bombshell news on us, it feels like the world is off-kilter.”

“So if your grandmother was healthy, you would still be keeping your distance, like before.”

Was she hinting that she’d wanted him to fight harder to get her back? One wrong move and he could wreck the moment. The only thing he knew to do was be honest.

“Hell, I don’t even really know what I mean except that we are here, together. And the thought of never being with you again is tearing me apart.”

She swallowed hard, chewing her bottom lip as she stared up at him.

Stone continued, “I also know I can’t just stand around and pretend to be unaffected. So either leave now or prepare to be fully, thoroughly kissed.”

“I, I just… I can’t.” She stuttered, shaking her head slowly, sidestepping away from the tree, then rushing past him.

She couldn’t be any clearer than that.

Disappointment delivered a kick to the gut even though he hadn’t expected anything different.

He gave her enough time to make it inside before he released the tree branch and started back toward the main house. He only had an afternoon and dinnertime to get his head together before they spent the night alone together in the guesthouse.

One afternoon didn’t sound like nearly long enough when even seven months hadn’t helped him get over Johanna.

* * *

Johanna had busied herself caring for the other three dogs, taking them on a hike, feeding them, hiking again, and still restless energy whirled inside her well into suppertime.

Their evening was coming to an end with coffee on the covered back porch, a lazy ceiling fan rustling the air. Soon, she wouldn’t be able to hide behind the Donavan family any longer. She would be spending the night alone with Stone.

Of course she could go to a hotel. Nothing in Mariah’s agreement said she had to sleep under the same roof as Stone. She just had to help him place the dogs. Except she didn’t want to cause an embarrassing scene for him in front of the Donavans….

Oh, hell, who was she kidding? She wanted to finish their afternoon conversation and learn more about why he was pursuing her now. He’d said his grandmother’s terminal illness had flipped his world. If he was reevaluating, could he change his mind on things that had kept them apart before?