Safe Haven(33)
Author: Nicholas Sparks

She blinked at him in confusion. “Who?”

“Katie,” he said. “I meant Katie. Katie Feldman.”

“No,” the hostess shouted back. “She’s off. She’s working tomorrow, though.” She nodded toward thewindows. “She’s probably out there somewhere, along with everyone else. I thought I saw her walk past hereearlier.”

Kevin turned and left, bumping into people as he went. Ignoring it. Outside, he paused at a sidewalk vendor. Hebought a baseball hat and a pair of inexpensive sunglasses. And then he began to walk.

The Ferris wheel went round and round, Alex and Josh in one seat and Kristen and Katie in another, hot wind intheir faces. Katie had her arm draped over Kristen’s shoulders, knowing that despite Kristen’s smile, she wasnervous about the height. As the seat rotated to its peak, unveiling a panorama of the town, Katie realized thatwhile she wasn’t exactly thrilled with the height, either, she was more concerned with the Ferris wheel itself. Thething looked like it was held together with bobby pins and chicken wire, even if it had supposedly passedinspection earlier that morning.

She wondered if Alex had been telling the truth about the inspection, or if he’d heard her saying aloud whetherit might be dangerous. It was too late to worry about it now, she supposed, so instead she occupied herself bystaring at the throngs of people below. The carnival had become even more crowded as the afternoon wore on,but aside from boating, there wasn’t a lot to do in Southport. It was a sleepy little town, and she surmised that anevent like this was probably the highlight of the year.

The Ferris wheel slowed and stopped, stranding them as the first of the passengers got out and others crawledon. It rotated a bit, and she found herself scrutinizing the crowd more closely. Kristen seemed more relaxed andwas doing the same.

She recognized a couple of people eating snow cones as regulars at Ivan’s, and she wondered how manyothers were out there. Her eyes began to travel from group to group, and for some reason she remembered thatshe used to do the same thing when she first started working at Ivan’s. Back when she was watching for Kevin.

Kevin walked past the booths that lined either side of the street, just wandering and trying to think like Erin. Heshould have asked the hostess if she’d seen Erin with a man because he knew she wouldn’t be at the carnivalalone. It was hard to keep reminding himself that she might have short brown hair because she’d cut and dyed it.

He should have had the pedophile at the other precinct get a copy of the driver’s license photo, but he hadn’tbeen thinking at the time, and it didn’t matter now because he knew where she lived and he would go back.

He could feel the gun in his waistband, pressing against his skin. It felt uncomfortable, pinching his flesh, and itwas hot under the ball hat, especially since it was pulled low and tight. His head felt like it would explode.

He moved around groups of people, lines that formed. Arts and crafts. Decorated pinecones, stained glass inframes, wind chimes. Old-fashioned toys carved from wood. People were stuffing their faces with food: pretzelsand ice cream, nachos, cinnamon rolls. He saw babies in strollers and remembered again that Erin wanted to havea baby. He decided he would give her one. A girl or a boy, it didn’t matter, but he preferred a boy because girlswere selfish and wouldn’t appreciate the life he gave them. Girls were like that.

People talked and whispered all around him and he thought some of them were staring at him, like Coffey andRamirez used to do. He ignored them, focused on his search. Families. Teens with their arms around one another.

A guy in a sombrero. A couple of the carnival workers stood near a streetlight, smoking. Thin and tattooed, withbad teeth. Probably drug users, with long records. They gave him a bad feeling. He was a good detective andknew how to read people and he didn’t trust them but they did nothing as he brushed past them.

He veered left and right, working his way steadily through the crowd, studying people’s faces. He paused whilean overweight couple waddled past him, eating corn dogs, their faces red and blotchy. He hated fat people,thought they were weak and had no discipline, people who complained about their blood pressure and diabetesand heart problems and whined about the cost of medicine, but couldn’t summon the strength to put the forkdown. Erin was always thin but her br**sts were big and now she was here with another man who fondled them atnight and the thought made him burn inside. He hated her. But he wanted her, too. Loved her. It was hard to keep itstraight in his head. He’d been drinking too much and it was just so damn hot. Why had she moved to a place ashellish as this?

He wandered among the carnival rides and noticed the Ferris wheel up ahead. He moved closer, bumping into aman in a tank top, ignoring his muttered outrage. He checked the seats on the ride, his gaze flashing on everyface. Erin wasn’t there, or in the line, either.

He moved on, walking in the heat among the fat people, looking for skinny Erin and the man who touched herbreasts at night. With every step, he thought about the Glock.

The swings, spinning clockwise, were a big hit with the kids. They’d ridden them twice in the morning, and afterthe Ferris wheel Kristen and Josh begged to ride them once more. There were only a few tickets left and Alexagreed, explaining that after this last ride they would have to go home. He wanted to have time to shower and eatand maybe relax before he had to drive to Raleigh.

Despite his best efforts, he couldn’t stop thinking about Katie’s earlier suggestive remark. She seemed tosense the direction of his thoughts, because he’d caught her staring at him a number of times, a provocativesmile playing at the corner of her lips.

Now she stood beside him, smiling up at the kids. He scooted closer, slipping his arm around her, and felt herlean into him. He said nothing, for there was no need for words, and she said nothing, either. Instead, she tilted herhead, resting it against his shoulder, and Alex was struck by the notion that there was nothing better in the world.

Erin wasn’t at the tilt-a-whirl or the maze of mirrors or the haunted house. He watched from the ticket line, trying toblend in, wanting to see her before she spotted him. He had the advantage because he knew she was here andshe didn’t know about him, but sometimes people got lucky and strange things happened. He flashed on thememory of Karen Feldman and the day she revealed Erin’s secret.

He wished he hadn’t left his vodka in the car. There didn’t seem to be anywhere to buy more, not a bar in sight.

He hadn’t even seen a booth selling beer, which he didn’t like but would have bought if he had no other choice.

The smell of food made him nauseated and hungry at the same time and he could feel the sweat plastering hisshirt to his back and armpits.

He walked by the games of chance, run by con artists. Waste of money because the games were rigged, butmorons packed around them. He searched faces. No Erin.

He wandered toward the other rides. There were kids in bumper cars, people fidgeting in the line. Beyond thatwere the swings, and he started in that direction. He circumvented a cluster of people, straining for a better view.

* * *

The swings had begun to slow, but Kristen and Josh were still grinning with excitement. Alex was right aboutneeding to call it a day; the heat had drained Katie and it would be nice to be able to cool off for a while. If therewas one bad thing about the cottage—well, there was actually more than one bad thing, she supposed—it wasthat it didn’t have air-conditioning. She’d gotten used to keeping the windows open at night, but it didn’t helpmuch.

The ride came to a stop and Josh unhooked the chain and jumped down. It took Kristen a little longer beforeshe could manage it, but a moment later, the two children were scrambling back toward Katie and their dad.

Kevin saw the swings come to a stop and a bunch of kids jump down from their seats, but that wasn’t where hefocused his attention. Instead, he concentrated on the adults who were crowding the perimeter of the ride.

He kept walking, his eyes moving from one woman to the next. Blond or brunette, it didn’t matter. He watchedfor Erin’s lean figure. From his angle, he couldn’t see the faces of the people directly in front of him, so hechanged directions. In a few seconds, once the kids reached the exit, everyone would scatter again.

He walked quickly. A family stood in front of him, holding tickets, debating where to go next, arguing inconfusion. Idiots. He skirted them, straining to see faces near the swings.

No skinny women, except for one. A short-haired brunette, standing next to a man with gray hair, his armaround her waist.

She was unmistakable. Same long legs, same face, same sinewy arms.

Erin.

36

Alex and Katie held hands as they walked toward Ivan’s with the kids. They’d stored their bicycles near the backdoor, Katie’s regular spot. On the way out, Alex bought some water for Josh and Kristen before they startedtoward home.

“Good day, guys?” Alex asked, bending over to unlock the bikes.

“Great day, Daddy,” Kristen answered, her face red with the heat.

Josh wiped his mouth on his arm. “Can we come back tomorrow?”

“Maybe,” Alex fudged.

“Please? I want to ride the swing again.”

Finished with the locks, Alex slung the chains over his shoulder. “We’ll see,” he said.

An overhang in the back of the restaurant provided some shade, but it was still warm. After seeing howcrowded it had been as she’d walked past the windows, Katie was glad she’d taken the day off, even if she had towork a double shift tomorrow and Monday. It was worth it. It had been a good day, and she’d get to relax andwatch a movie with the kids while Alex was away tonight. And then later, when he got back…

“What?” Alex said.

“Nothing.”

“You were staring at me like you were going to eat me up.”

“Just drifting off there for a second,” she said with a wink. “I think the heat kind of got to me.”

“Uh-huh.” He nodded. “If I didn’t know better…”

“I’d like to remind you that there are some young ears tuning in right now, so I’d watch what you say.” Shekissed him before patting him lightly on the chest.

Neither of them noticed the man in the baseball hat and sunglasses watching them from the deck of theneighboring restaurant.

Kevin felt dizzy as he watched Erin and the gray-haired man kiss, seeing the way Erin flirted with him. He sawher lean down and smile at the little girl. Watched as she tousled the hair of the little boy. Noticed the gray-hairedman pat her on her butt when the children’s attention was elsewhere. And Erin—his wife—was playing along.

Liking it. Encouraging it. Cheating on him with her new family, as if Kevin and their marriage had never existed atall.

They got on their bikes and started pedaling, heading around the side of the building, away from Kevin. Erinrode beside the gray-haired man. She was wearing shorts and sandals, showing skin, looking sexy for someoneelse.

Kevin followed them. Her hair was blond and long and flowing… but then he blinked, and it was short andbrown again. Pretending she wasn’t Erin and riding bikes with her new family and kissing another man andsmiling and smiling, without a care in the world. It wasn’t real, he told himself. It was nothing but a dream. Anightmare. Docked boats wobbled in their slips as they passed.

He rounded the corner. They were riding and he was on foot, but they were moving slowly to allow the little girlto keep up. He was closing the distance and he was near enough to hear Erin laugh, sounding happy. He reachedfor the Glock in his waistband and pulled it out, then slid it beneath his shirt, keeping it pressed against his skin.

He took off the baseball hat and used it to hide the gun from the people around him.

His thoughts ricocheted like pachinko balls, bouncing fast, left and right, downward, downward. Erin lying andcheating and plotting and scheming. Running away to find a lover. Talking and laughing behind his back.

Whispering to the gray-haired man, saying dirty things, the man’s hands on her br**sts, her breaths coming hard.

Pretending she wasn’t married, ignoring all he’d done for her and the sacrifices he’d made and that he had toscrape the blood from his shoes and that Coffey and Ramirez were always gossiping about him and there wereflies buzzing on the burgers because she’d run away and he’d had to go to the barbecue alone and she couldn’ttell Bill the captain that he wasn’t just one of the guys.

And there she was, pedaling easily, her hair short and dyed, as pretty as ever, never thinking about herhusband at all. Never caring about him. Forgetting him and the marriage so she could have a life with the gray-haired man and pat his chest and kiss him with a dreamy expression on her face. Happy and serene, without aconcern in the world. Going to carnivals, riding bikes. She probably sang to herself in the shower while he’d beencrying and remembering the perfume he’d bought her for Christmas, and none of it mattered because she wasselfish and thought she could throw a marriage away, like an empty pizza box.

He unconsciously picked up his pace. The crowds were slowing them down, and he knew that he could raisethe gun and kill her right now. His finger moved to the trigger and he slipped the safety off because the Bible says

Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the bed be undefiled , but he realized that it meant he had to killthe gray-haired man as well. He could kill him in front of her. All he had to do was pull the trigger, but then hittingmoving targets from a distance was almost impossible with a Glock, and there were people everywhere. Theywould see the gun and scream and shout and the shot was almost impossible, so he removed his finger from thetrigger.

“Quit veering toward your sister!” the gray-haired man said, up ahead, his voice almost lost in the distance. Buthis words were real and Kevin imagined the dirty things he whispered to Erin. He could feel the rage buildinginside him. Then, all at once, the kids turned the corner and they were followed by Erin and the gray-haired man.