Seeking Her (Losing It #3.5)(15)
Author: Cora Carmack

The building was partially demolished in places, including the wall that had been knocked down between the bar area and the dance floor. In dangerously high heels, Kelsey tried to walk over the rubble that had been left behind. Her foot slid in her shoes, and her ankle turned sideways.

I thought she was going to do a face-­plant directly on the rubble, so I rushed forward. At the last second, she balanced herself with a hand and then slumped into a sitting position.

I should have backed away.

But then she’d already seen me. And maybe this was my shot. To get some answers. To know her. To help her.

“What?” I asked, fully prepared to see her pouting up at me. “No more locals around to carry you?” Did that make me sound creepy, that I’d seen one of those Hungarian guys pick her up and carry her over the rubble earlier? Or did I just sound like an ass**le?

Both. Probably both.

She looked up at me, and her eyes were dilated in the dim room, that ring of green barely perceptible even though I stood only a few feet away.

She straightened her shoulders and tipped up her chin. “I don’t need anyone to carry me.” Her hands roved over the rocks until she found purchase and started to push herself up. “I’m perfectly—­whoa.” She tilted sideways, her ankle rolling over again and she plopped down on her ass, harder this time. She held her hands up close to her face like she’d hurt them, and I had an indistinct urge, like a tugging at my middle, to do something.

Before she could really hurt herself, I stepped closer, finding a steady place to plant my boot. I hooked an arm underneath her knees, slipped the other around her back, and pulled her up into my arms. Her head lolled back, bumping against my bicep, and then I could feel her breath grazing my neck.

I clenched my jaw and focused on getting through the opening into the room with the bar. She gripped the back of my shirt near my shoulder blade, and the light touch ­coupled with the way she was staring at me, made a storm of curses rise in my mind.

You’re one stupid man. Fucking stupid.

“You remind me of God,” she said.

I laughed. Is that how she ended up with a different guy falling all over himself every night? Playing upon their God complexes?

“Well, that’s a new one for me.”

Unless you count—­Jesus Christ, get a job. Jesus Christ, grow up. Jesus Christ, you’re a disappointment. Those were familiar sentiments from my past.

She squinched up her eyes and shook her head in a way that made her look younger and made me want to laugh again.

“I meant . . .” Her frustration was almost endearing. “Let me down. I don’t need anyone to carry me.”

And we were back to abrasive. I wanted to tell her to shed the spoiled exterior because I knew there was something more underneath. But I couldn’t say that. That was exactly what I couldn’t say.

“I don’t care what you think you need.”

She rolled her eyes and then nuzzled her head into my shoulder. “Fine, carry me all night. Works for me.”

God help me, but I was both annoyed and attracted to her. I always had been drawn to things that were bad for me, and she would definitely top that list.

Before I could do something stupid, like lean down and capture that stubborn pout with my lips, I dropped the arm that held up her knees and made her stand up on her own.

She gave me a small almost-­scowl, but then shrugged in disinterest and began to flounce away.

“What? No thank-­you?”

She stared at me over her shoulder and said seriously, “I’m not in the habit of thanking ­people who do things to me against my will. So, if you don’t mind—­”

She turned, ignoring me, and signaled for the bartender.

I hesitated. I could leave now and take my chances that she would only remember me in passing, not enough to severely hinder my job. She’d had enough to drink that that might be likely.

Or I could stay because . . . Well, I didn’t have shit on the because side of things. My feet were already moving forward, and I’d already pulled out a stool to take a seat beside her. Because I wanted to.

“Give her a water, too,” I said to the bartender.

She glared at me like I said, Give her the plague while you’re at it.

I was a masochist. Really. That was the only explanation. You’d think voluntarily going to war would have taught me that; but no, staring into her eyes was when it became truly evident.

“You’re awfully pushy, stranger.”

She bit her lip, and her eyes wandered down the muscles of my arms, and I was glad I was sitting down because my body liked that entirely too much. I directed my eyes to the worn wood of the bar that looked like it had been repurposed and put together from scraps.

“You’re awfully drunk, princess.”

I needed to keep reminding myself of that.

She laughed. “Honey, I’m barely getting started. When I start talking about how I can’t feel my cheeks and get a little touchy-­feely, then you’ll know I’m awfully drunk.”

I’d seen her be touchy-­feely, and then some. And the thought of being on the receiving end of that made the temperature seem to rise a few degrees.

The bartender returned with a shot of tequila, a slice of lemon laid across the top of the glass, and a cup of water.

Kelsey shot me a look of mock disdain and pushed the cup in my direction. I squeezed my hand around it as she took hold of her shot, offered me a sarcastic salute, and then tipped it back.

It was one thing to watch her drink every night from afar; it was harder to be there right beside her. She’d thrown back the tequila without even a wince. In fact, I think she smiled as she bit into the slice of lemon. I stared at the empty shot glass she placed on the table, just the barest trace of tequila settling back down to the bottom.

To distract myself, I said, “If you’re trying to drink away the memory of that kiss on the dance floor, I doubt it will work. That’s the kind of kiss that sticks with you.”

She made a face. The kind of face most ­people make after a shot of tequila. “You don’t have to tell me that.” She rubbed her knuckles across her cheek, no doubt remembering the path her friend had licked out on the dance floor.

I felt the need to laugh again, but stifled it. I didn’t know what it was about this girl that was so funny to me. Maybe it was just that I saw a previous version of me in her, and I was finally starting to get enough distance from that version that I could see the absurdity in it all.