Slave to Sensation

Sascha was caught by the passion in the healer's voice.

"He's undoubtedly our alpha, someone we'd follow into hell and back if he asked it of us. But it takes more than an iron fist to rule, and he was starting to lose those other parts."

"He's so good with Kit," Sascha said, recalling all the times she'd seen him with the juvenile.

"Five months ago, not long after we lost Kylie, he banned Kit from solo runs."

"Why?"

"He didn't want the boy hurt." Tamsyn shook her head. "Kit has the scent of a future alpha - to have him always have a babysitter could've destroyed his development and turned him from us. Even more than the other juveniles, Kit needs the freedom to let his beast roam."

"You persuaded Lucas to change his mind?"

"No, Sascha. You did." She put a hand on Sascha's knee. "Kit was ready to rebel when Lucas quietly took him out for a run soon after he met you. When he came back, Kit wasn't with him."

"He let Kit go his own way?" Sascha knew it must've been one of the hardest things he'd ever done. Protecting his own was a compulsion with him. It was also something he couldn't indulge in - it would smother the very people he was trying to shelter from harm.

Tamsyn nodded. "You allow him to think, to see past his emotions."

"I think you're giving me too much credit. I can barely understand my own emotions."

"I think I know what an E-Psy is."

Sascha twisted her fingers together. "You think E stands for Emotion, don't you? I've already considered that but it makes no sense. Before Silence, all Psy felt emotion."

Tamsyn didn't answer her. "The changeling healers around the country have a sort of informal alliance," she said, in what seemed a complete change of topic. "We share our knowledge in spite of the fact that we might belong to enemy groups. The alphas don't even try to stop us. They know we're healers because we can't be anything else - we refuse to withhold information that could save a life."

"And the Psy call themselves enlightened," Sascha whispered, stunned by the humanity of these so-called animals. "We wouldn't give water to our enemy if he lay dying on our doorstep."

"You would, Sascha. You're Psy, too. Maybe, just maybe, there are more like you than you know."

"If you knew how much I hoped for that... I don't want to be alone, Tamsyn." Tears choked up her throat. "I don't want to die in cold silence."

Tamsyn shook her head. "You're never going to be alone again. You belong to us, to Pack." Her hand covered Sascha's. "Don't be afraid of letting go of the PsyNet. We'll catch you when you fall."

Sascha desperately wanted to tell her the truth but couldn't. If any of the leopards found out, they'd never allow her to set her plan in motion and it had to go ahead. If it didn't, the SnowDancers would declare war. In a war between the most lethal wolf and leopard packs in the country and the Psy, thousands would die, innocents and guilty alike.

Nobody could know the ultimate secret of the PsyNet. It wasn't only an information net, it was a life net. No one knew when it had been created, but theories abounded that it had come into existence on its own because Psy minds needed the feedback of other Psy minds.

Deprived of that feedback, they shut down and died. Even comatose Psy retained the PsyNet link, their bodies well aware of the requirement for the connection to ensure survival. The instant Sascha dropped out of the Net, she'd begin to slip into the final darkness.

"Thank you," she said to Tamsyn, hiding her fear.

The woman squeezed her hand. "The reason I told you about the healers alliance is that we pass on a lot of things through word of mouth. One of our oral stories is very interesting - it tells of healers of the mind. They disappeared from the stories almost a hundred years ago. Interesting timing, don't you think?"

Sascha stared. "Mind healers?"

"Yes. They could apparently take suffering and anger from people, enabling them to see past the block emotion can often be. They could also heal those who'd been abused, violated, hurt in a thousand different ways. They bandaged up wounds that might otherwise have destroyed people." Tamsyn's eyes were intent. "They were adored because everything that they took from others, they put into themselves. They had the capacity to neutralize the burden, but it had to have hurt."

Sascha was so stunned, she was trembling. All those times she'd imagined taking away people's pain, all those times she'd felt the heavy rock of others' emotions sitting on her heart... none of it had been pretend. "They healed souls," she whispered, knowing Tamsyn was right.

The explanation fit. No wonder she was fracturing. Her cardinal powers had been brutally contained for twenty-six years, growing endlessly with no release. The pressure point had been reached.

"I think that's what you are, Sascha. A healer of souls."

A single tear streaked down Sascha's face. "They told me I was broken," she whispered. "They told me I was flawed." Because of their lies, she'd contained her light, her rainbow of stars, trapping the healing gifts of her mind. "They crippled me. And they had to have known!" Her mother certainly had to have understood her child's unusual mind. She was Council - she knew their history, what had to be hidden... what had to be destroyed.

"When they tried to get rid of violence," Tamsyn said, shifting over to sit beside Sascha, one arm around her shoulders, "they also got rid of one of their most precious gifts."

Lucas walked out to the front yard, Nate and Dorian by his side. Vaughn and Clay were hidden in the shadows and Mercy was prowling the treetops behind the SnowDancers.

Hawke stood in the yard flanked by two wolves Lucas knew to be his lieutenants. Indigo was a stunningly beautiful female with the cold eyes of a snow wolf. Tall and slender, she was undoubtedly deadly. Riley was a solid-looking male who appeared to move slow. It was an illusion. He could take down a fully grown wolf in about three seconds flat. Without changing form.

"Why are you here?" Lucas asked.

Hawke walked forward, leaving his lieutenants behind. Lucas did the same. Two alphas meeting in neutral territory. Except it wasn't. This was a DarkRiver safe house. The wolves shouldn't have set foot near it without a damn good reason. He'd accepted Hawke's previous intrusion because the alpha had come alone. Bringing others was a sign of aggression.

"We want to talk to your Psy," Hawke said without prelude.

Lucas felt fury ripple through him. "No."

"I trust you, cat, but I don't trust any of the Psy." Hawke's eyes held bloodlust. "I won't let the lives of my people hang in the hands of one of those creatures without meeting her for myself. This is the fourth day since Brenna was taken - we have only two days before he kills. And you're asking us to wait."

"If you trust me, why do you need to see her?"

"Wouldn't you do the same if the situations were reversed? What if it was Rina in the hands of that monster?" His entire face went unnaturally calm. "We're not here to pick a fight so you might want to tell the cat up in the trees to stay back."

Lucas wasn't surprised Hawke had picked up Mercy's scent - the man hadn't become alpha of a lethal pack by being weak. Neither had Lucas. "Mercy's not the one you should be worried about."

"Damn it to hell, Lucas. Don't break our alliance over a fucking, worthless Psy. They're nothing - "

Lucas slammed a fist into Hawke's jaw. Hard. The wolf went down. Growls echoed around the yard as sentinels and lieutenants crouched down for battle.

Chapter 21

Standing over the fallen wolf, Lucas forced himself not to bare his teeth. "She's mine. Think about that the next time you open your big mouth."

Getting up, Hawke slashed his hand down. Indigo and Riley straightened from their crouch. "Hell, Lucas. You could've told me you'd really mated to her." He rubbed at his bruised jaw and winced. "You have a right like a damn freight train."

"You shouldn't be here."

"I was the one who brought you your Psy safe and sound."

Lucas stared at the other alpha and even through the protective rage running through him, he knew Hawke was right. He did have a right to meet the woman he was being asked to entrust with the life of one of his people. Riley, too, must need assurance that his sister's life was in safe hands. "Do all your wolves know about this place?"

"No. Just like not all your leopards know the location of our tunnels." It was a reminder that Lucas and his sentinels had tracked down the SnowDancers' main hideout.

Since the start, their alliance had been cool and distanced, two predators circling each other, not quite sure when the other would bite. It was time to take the next step, to build strength the Psy would truly fear. "I'm going to invite you into this home."

They'd always done their talking out in the open, away from their personal places. Though it had never been said, they both knew it was so that those places wouldn't be tainted by violence if blood was spilled. Theirs was a fragile trust and it was no longer enough. With his invitation, he'd not only accepted, but expanded, the offer that had been hinted at when Hawke's lieutenants had treated DarkRiver juveniles as their own.

Ice-blue eyes looked at him without blinking. "That's a good deal of trust."

"Don't make me regret it." He held out his arm.

The other alpha clasped it at the elbow and they went toward each other in the hard embrace of two hunters. When they drew back, Lucas turned to head toward the safe house. Hawke followed with his lieutenants stalking behind him.

"Free passage," Hawke said as they walked. It was clear enough to be heard by the other changelings.

Lucas thought about the war that might break out, thought about the safety of his people. And then he thought about what they would want, what he had no right to deny them. They were predators but they were also human in a way the Psy would never be. "Free passage."