Solitary Man(21)
Author: Carly Phillips

Nikki figured she could either lose her mind or try to draw the older woman out. “Yeah, but I grew up on a farm. Everyone pitched in. I mean even the cows gave milk.”

It worked. The other woman cracked a smile on her professional face. Nikki waved a hand toward one of the chairs, motioning for her to sit.

Eleanor hesitated, then sat down beside Nikki at the table. “How are you feeling?” she asked finally.

After three days a week of Mrs. Reid puttering around her but never invading her personal space, Nikki was grateful she’d penetrated her shell. Nikki was lonely.

Funny, but even in college, she’d been independent. She had many friends, and a roommate, but she’d been on her own more often than not. And after Tony died, she and Janine had lived opposite schedules, which left Nikki alone during the day. She hadn’t been lonely then.

But she was now. Because for the first time she knew what it was like to live with someone—and be totally, utterly alone. Oh, Kevin was around, her constant companion when not at work, making sure she felt okay, didn’t get out of bed too often and wanted for nothing. But he was as distant as he could be with the constant awareness sizzling between them.

Perhaps because of her strong feelings for him, Nikki felt the emptiness that much more. Which made her determined not to take this confinement lying down. She had to approach the future as if it didn’t involve Kevin, and prepare both herself and her baby for that eventuality.

But she smiled at her companion. “I’m feeling okay.”

“Good, because some women would be climbing the walls after a week of bed rest.”

Nikki dropped her head to her hands, which lay on the table. “I lied. I’m not okay. I’m bored out of my mind,” she wailed. She lifted her head and grinned. “Thank you. I feel much better now.”

“When are you due?”

Her hand went to her stomach, as it automatically did each time she thought of the baby. “Early November.”

“A Scorpio. Determined little buggers with long memories. Protective of those they care about.”

“Sounds a lot like his father,” Nikki murmured. She’d begun thinking of the baby in terms of he, probably because she envisioned a tough little guy like Kevin.

“Mmm. Baby’s lucky to have such a caring man as a parent. Not all kids get that lucky.”

She wondered if Kevin thought of his son—or daughter—as lucky to have him for a father. Though she hadn’t planned this pregnancy, she knew she thought her baby was fortunate to have him around. But he’d been on a downward spiral of guilt since Tony died. If nothing else, maybe this baby would give him a positive focus.

“You’re perceptive, Mrs…. Can I call you Eleanor? I mean if we’re going to be cooped up together, the formality seems kind of silly, doesn’t it?”

“Eleanor it is.” She smiled in return. “You seem perceptive yourself, for one so young.”

Nikki shrugged. “Let’s say I’ve lived a lot in a short time.”

“Well, you and Mr. Manning seem like a nice young couple.”

They were nice, and young… but a couple? Nikki shook her head, knowing if Kevin had his way, they would never be an us.

Did he realize what the future could hold? What kind of family life the three of them could have, if he opened his heart ? Shivering at the direction of her thoughts, she sought for a way to change the subject.

Eleanor did it for her. She cleared her throat. “I really should clean this mess up though, before Mr. Manning gets home.”

Nikki nodded. But she dreaded the thought of another long evening. “If you finish early… would you be interested in a game of cards?” Nikki asked. Kevin had left her a deck earlier. For Solitaire. She grimaced.

“I’m not much of a card player, but I did see a Scrabble board on the top shelf of the closet when I was cleaning.”

Nikki’s brain kicked into gear for the first time in four months. Waitressing was good for her checkbook, but the mental stimulation had been minimal. Unless she counted the numerous ways of ducking a come-on, she thought wryly. “That sounds great”

“Why don’t you rest for awhile and I’ll come get you when I’m finished in here.”

Nikki nodded. She yawned, amazed she could be tired when all she did was lounge around. With Kevin due home soon, and with him the return of tension, she might as well gather her strength while she could.

Once in her room, she lay down on the gingham checked comforter and stretched until she found a comfortable position. Her gaze fell to a small bouquet of freshly cut flowers in a vase on the dresser. A gift from Janine, they reminded her of many things. Especially the life growing inside her and the dream that she’d one day have the family she’d always wanted. She couldn’t base her future on hope.

She pulled open her dresser drawer and withdrew her college transcripts and deferral letter. Though she’d always wanted to be a stay-at-home mother, she’d wanted to make the choice, not be forced into it out of necessity. The only way she’d have all her options open to her was if she finished her last semester of student teaching and graduated college.

With or without Kevin—whether he liked it or not—she had to get her degree and reestablish her independence. Or she’d lose herself and all the progress she’d made.

* * *

Kevin checked the locks on the warehouse door and headed back inside. The security cameras he’d installed would monitor comings and goings in detail, and so would the guard stationed at the desk. As a result, not only were his hands free, but so was his mind. Free to focus on Nikki and what he’d come to think of as the invasion of his home.

Having always lived alone, he’d grown used to complete silence. Not that he’d liked it, but it was all he’d known. And it was preferable to the sound of a drunk knocking into furniture or the constant fighting he’d grown up with.

When he’d moved into the old house, he hadn’t bothered with any kind of decorating beyond what his aunt had done—though with a baby on the way, he’d have to give some sort of thought to change. But for now he had his hands full with his female… What did he call her?

Houseguest was too generic a term for the soft female lounging in oversized tops and looking far too warm and welcoming for his peace of mind. He’d managed to keep his distance so far, but it hadn’t been easy. It took every ounce of discipline he’d learned on the force not to gather her into his arms and keep her there.