Song of the Fireflies(20)
Author: J.A. Redmerski

“It was Bray’s.”

“And you’re sure it was an accident?” He looked at me in a short, sidelong manner.

“Yes, she said it was an accident, and I believe her.”

“Do you?” He raised his back from the recliner and slumped over forward, resting his arms across his pant legs. “Think about it, Elias. Think about it long and hard, because the answer really is the difference between you doing what the law says is right and you doing what your heart says is right. You have to be sure. One hundred percent, son.”

I thought about it, just like he said to do, but I didn’t have to think long. I already knew.

“I know it was an accident,” I said. “She wouldn’t lie to me. And I could tell she was telling the truth. Bray may be brazen and a little over the top sometimes, but she’d never intentionally do something like that.”

My dad nodded once, accepting my explanation, trusting in me and what I believed. “Y’know, Elias, as your father, first and foremost I have to tell you that I don’t want to see you ruin your life to protect someone else’s.” He set his beer down again and got up from the chair. His camouflaged T-shirt hung sloppily over the top of his jeans. “But I’d be a fool and a hypocrite to expect you not to follow your heart.” He turned and looked down at me. “What do you need?”

I stood up with him, leaving my beer on the coffee table, and I hugged him long and hard. I wondered if it would be the last time I ever saw him, at least without a thick wall of security glass separating us.

I left my father that day with some extra cash to get us by for a little while at least, but more important, with his advice, which I always took to heart. He told me that I should try everything in my power to talk Bray into turning herself in before it was too late.

“Are you sure that’s what’s stopping you?” he had said. “Because you think it’s too late?”

“Yes,” I had lied. “We’re already in this too deeply to turn back now.”

But my father was a smart man. He could see right through me and I knew that he could. Bray and I still could’ve turned back and done the “right” thing, but I couldn’t lose her again, and Bray didn’t want to lose me. We had already established that before we left the ridge that night. And that was the way it was going to stay.

I went back to our motel room with burgers and fries.

We ate in silence. Silence seemed to be the norm for a while. And we watched television, both afraid we’d turn the news on at ten o’clock and see our faces staring back at us from the screen next to a reporter. But for the first several days, from Savannah to Fernandina Beach to Daytona Beach, we were still in the clear. Bray’s cell phone hardly ever rang. Just once when her sister, Rian, called to see how she was doing. Bray let it go to voice mail.

My mom, on the other hand, called me constantly. Not wanting to worry her any more than she already was, I ignored my own rule about phone calls and answered after the third concerned voice mail. I told her that I was on vacation and not to worry. I don’t think she believed me deep down, but she accepted it. My boss at Rixey Construction called only twice. After that, I was pretty sure that was the end of my job. But my mom was the only reason I didn’t get rid of my and Bray’s cell phones earlier. In the back of my mind I worried they’d eventually be what led the police right to us, but I couldn’t listen to reason. The thought of my mom worried sick to death over me kicked my reason in the ass. Until this day. I finally decided that it was time we ditched our phones, and so I stuffed them in a Burger King bag with our leftover fries and tossed everything in the garbage. Bray looked at me like I was crazy, but she understood.

By the end of the month, we were in West Palm Beach soaking up the sun and enjoying the somewhat warmer weather that a little farther south had to offer.

And we were already beginning to get settled into a false safe zone.

“We can’t afford too many more motels,” I said as I came out of the shower. “I have some money in the bank, but if I withdraw it or write a check, everybody will know where we are.”

It was the only reason I borrowed cash from my father in the first place. We left Athens so fast I didn’t think to stop at an ATM and withdraw the money before we left.

“How much do we have?” Bray said, coming up to me. She fit her fingers between the towel and my waist and pulled my body toward her.

“A few hundred bucks, but that’s it. We’ll need that for gas, unless we find a place to park it for a while.”

She kissed me lightly on the lips. “I say we find a place to park it then,” she said, but she wasn’t thinking much about the conversation. She was horny.

That was one thing that never changed about the two of us. Despite all that was going on, nothing ever ruined the many intimate moments we had on a daily and nightly basis. She seemed as addicted to sex as I was. But I’d never say that to her. And I definitely wasn’t going to complain.

“I don’t like all this driving around anyway,” she added, tugging on my bottom lip with her teeth.

I slipped my fingers down the front of her panties.

“I don’t either,” I said and found her wetness.

She gasped when I slid my middle finger between her lips and touched her clit.

“Then what do you think we should do?” she asked breathily.

“I dunno, we’ll figure it out later.” My mouth closed around hers and I sucked on her tongue, then I pushed her backward onto the bed, where I f**ked her for a long time.

Chapter Eleven

Bray

It would seem that it was too early for Elias and me to stop being afraid and on edge about what happened. I admit it. But really what we were doing was looking for any way out of that mind-set, because if we didn’t, it would’ve killed us. We just wanted to live life. And, well, it’s easy to forget about the significant things when you find other things to cover it up. Partying quickly became our means of salvation, the way out that we longed for. We learned fast how to replace misery and fear with happiness and enjoyment, and with drugs and alcohol. We couldn’t afford much ourselves, and the last thing we wanted to do was waste what little money we did have on shit like that, but we got by with freebies usually. A joint passed around a room. A group of partygoers already lit on alcohol, offering to buy the table the next round. And occasionally guys would buy me drinks when they thought I was alone.