Stories: All-New Tales

She closed the door behind her, but didn’t flip the switch. “Look,” she said to Dex, pointing with the gun at the floor behind him. He turned and saw the hundred-tooth smile of Killheffer. The fez was secured around the professor’s chin by a rubber band. A bullet had left a gaping third eye in his forehead.

“The rat f**k,” said Dex. He leaned over, grabbed his hat where it had fallen, and then felt through Killheffer’s jacket pockets. All he came up with was a cigar tube, holding a single Wrath Majestic. He slipped it into his inside jacket pocket.

“They’re coming,” said Adeline. She hit the lights. There was the sound of running feet and voices in the hallway. “They’re going door-to-door.”

“We’ll shoot our way out,” said Dex.

Adeline was next to him. She whispered in his ear, “Don’t be a jackass, we’ll take the fire escape.”

Dex moved toward the window. Adeline slipped off her heels.

Somehow Mondrian had known to call the car up, because when Dex and Adeline arrived in front of the Ice Garden, breathless, scuff marks on their clothes, the Belvedere was there, top down and running, Jim-Jim holding Adeline’s door.

“I like your shoes,” said the boy, pointing to her bare feet.

“My new fashion, Jim,” said Adeline.

Dex moved quickly around the car. Mondrian was there to open the door for him. As Dex slid in behind the wheel, he said, “No hard feelings about tonight,” and flashed a tip to cover the intended homicide. Mondrian bowed slightly and snatched the bill.

“Ever at your service,” said the maitre d’. “Safe journey.” He shut the car door.

Dex took a silver dollar out of his pocket, hit the gas, and flipped the coin back over the car. Jim-Jim caught it and before he could stash it in his vest pocket, the Belvedere was no more than two red dots halfway down the avenue of monkey-puzzle trees.

“My feet are killing me,” said Adeline as they screeched out of the entrance to the Ice Garden and onto the desert highway.

“You are one hell of a shot,” he said.

“Lucky,” she said, her voice rising above the wind.

“I’ll cherish the moment.”

“All well and good,” said Adeline, “but what’s his game this time?”

“Laughter in the dark,” said Dex and cut the wheel hard to the right. Adeline slid toward him and he wrapped his arm around her shoulders. The car left the road and raced along an avenue of moonlight, plowing through tumbleweeds, trailing a plume of dust across the desert. Adeline switched on the radio and found Dete Walader, crooning “I Remember You.”

They lay on a blanket beneath shimmering stars. A light breeze blew over them. Here and there, the dark form of a cactus stood sentry. Ten yards away, the radio in the Belvedere played something with strings. Adeline took a sip from her silver flask and handed it to Dex. He flicked the butt of the Majestic off into the sand, and took a drink.

“What is this stuff?” he asked, squinting.

“My own special mixture of oblivion,” she said.

“That’s Killheffer’s line,” he said. “Did you see him tonight?”

She nodded and laid her cheek against his chest. “In the ladies’ room; he was in the stall next to the one I chose, waiting for me.”

“He gets around,” said Dex, “’cause he was at our table when I got back to it.”

“He whispered from the other stall that he wanted me to kill Mondrian. I said I wouldn’t, but then he said he had the solution and was willing to trade me for the murder. I told him I wanted to see it. The next thing, the door to my stall flew open and he was standing there. I almost screamed. I didn’t know what to do. I was on the toilet, for criminy sake. He had that stupid smile on his face, and he pulled down his zipper.”

Dex rose to one elbow. “I’ll kill him,” he said.

“Too late,” said Adeline. “He reached into his pants and pulled out this big hypodermic needle with green juice in it. He said, ‘You see the tip at the end of that needle? Think of that as the period at the end of your interminable story. Do you want out?’ I just wanted to get rid of him, so I nodded. He handed me a gun and told me Mondrian was in Sizzle Parlor number four.”

A long time passed in silence.

“But, in the end, you decided to off Mondrian?” said Dex.

“I guess so,” said Adeline. “What else is there to do when we come to the Ice Garden but fall in with Killheffer’s scheme? Mondrian might as well be made of papier-mâché and that’s the long and short of it. He’s polite, but, sure, I’d clip him for the possibility of a ticket out.”

“I’d miss you,” said Dex.

“I wouldn’t leave you here alone,” she said. “I was getting the needle for you.”

“You didn’t think of using it yourself? Baby, I’m touched.”

“Well, maybe once when I realized that if it worked, you wouldn’t come for me anymore and I’d spend each go-round in that crappy apartment building back in dragsville watching the plaster crack.”

“I was ready to blow Mondrian’s brains out for you too,” he said. “I can see how stale it’s getting for you.”

“You never thought of yourself?” she asked.

Dex sat up and pointed into the distance at a pair of headlights. “Let’s get the guns,” he said. He stood and helped her up. She found her underwear a few feet away and slipped them back on.

“Who do you think it is?” she asked, joining him at the car.

He handed her a pistol. “Ice Garden thugs,” he said.

When the approaching car came to a halt a few feet from the blanket, Dex reached over the side of the Belvedere and hit the lights, to reveal a very old black car, more like a covered carriage with a steering wheel and no horse. The door opened and out stepped Mondrian. He carried an open umbrella and a small box. Taking three furtive steps forward, he called out, “Mr. Dexter.”

“Expecting rain, Mondrian?” said Dex.

“Stars, sir. Stars.”

Adeline laughed from where she was crouched behind the Belvedere.

“A package for the lady and gentleman,” said Mondrian.

“Set it down at your feet, right there, and then you can go,” said Dex.

Mondrian set the package on the sand, but remained standing at attention over it.

“What are you waiting for?” asked Dex.