Sweet Fall

“Okay,” she whispered back and went to move away from me. Reaching out, I grabbed her hip and wrenched her back. She wasn’t moving from this spot. We needed to keep hidden.

I didn’t anticipate her reaction.

“Get off me! Don’t touch me there!” Lexi said in panic, her shrill voice sounding like a horror movie scream in the quiet of the house.

Damn Norman Bates Psycho shit.

“Fuck, bitch, I’m off you!” I snapped back and shushed her panicking ass. “You gotta stay down here. They might come back again, and they’ll see you if you’re not hiding behind this couch! The rest of the room’s too open and light with the f**kin’ skylight!”

Here in the dark shadows, I couldn’t see her, but I could feel her shaking.

What the f**k?

My hands were held up by my head just to show I wasn’t gonna touch her again. I couldn’t deal with this level of crazy right now.

I could feel warmth radiating off her like a damn space heater. And when she slipped back into a hazy beam of moonlight, her hand was on her chest as if trying to calm her pounding heart.

“Okay… okay,” she said breathlessly and slumped back down beside me. “I’ll lie back down.”

This time she was facing me and her eyes never left my hands, as if making sure I wasn’t gonna attempt to touch her again. I wondered what the hell was up with that shit? But I wasn’t gonna pry. Had too much to deal with myself to be concerned with her damn emo issues too.

Crickets chirped outside, and every fifteen minutes, the sound of the campus cops’ radios filled the house. They were doing their rounds—just like good little bitches of the dean—the light from their flashlights illuminating the room, except here behind the couch, where we had our own little pocket of protection.

Hours and hours passed in silence, and I lay on my back just staring once more at the stars through the skylight, the sky brightening with the rising dawn, the dark room now lightened by a hazy orange glow.

I heard Lexi sigh beside me, and I asked, “What do think of when you look up at the stars?”

I caught Lexi’s head tilt to the side and her eyes narrowed in scrutiny.

Minutes passed as she stared silently at the night sky. “Sometimes I wonder what they must make of our world,” she whispered quietly. I didn’t think she’d respond. “Do we fascinate them or disgust them? Do they look down on us the same way we look up at them and wonder what we’re thinking too? Do they see all our problems? Watch our sorrowful excuses for lives with a growing sense of pity? Or do they envy us for just having a life, good or bad?”

Her response surprised me. Sorrowful excuses for lives?

“Ever look at them and feel inferior, feel small?” I added, really wanting to hear her answer.

Lexi fidgeted beside me, lifting her hands to create a frame with her fingers, her left eye closed as she studied Orion’s Belt like she was looking through a telescope. But her hands abruptly lowered and laid flat to her stomach, a guttering expression on her face. “I don’t need to look up at the stars to feel inferior, Austin. All I have to do is open my eyes and look at myself in the mirror.”

My attention snapped to her and a strange feeling rolled my stomach—sympathy?

Lexi yawned beside me and her eyelids began to droop, but she fought to stay awake, never taking her eyes off the stars. I couldn’t stop watching her. Something about her intrigued me. Or maybe it was the fact that she knew about me, about who I was, that drew me to her. I didn’t have to pretend just for right here, right now.

“Go to sleep,” I said after her third consecutive yawn, and she focused on me once more. She was making me f**kin’ tired, and I needed to stay alert.

Lexi simply shook her head and wrapped her arms around her chest, fighting off another yawn.

Damn stubborn chick.

“Lexi, go to f**kin’ sleep. We’re gonna be here all night anyway,” I ordered, and I watched her tired eyes widen.

“Are you gonna sleep?” she asked, and I frowned. Why the f**k did that matter?

“Probably, at some point,” I replied and shrugged my shoulders.

“Okay, then. But…” Her lips pursed in tension. “But please don’t touch me. I… can’t be touched… I’ll stay here hidden, just… don’t touch me.”

“I won’t,” I said vehemently through gritted teeth. Did she think I was gonna grope her in her sleep or some shit? What the hell did she think of me?

Lexi’s eyes closed and, within seconds, she was out, all curled up in the fetal position on the hardwood floor. She looked like a fallen, broken pixie.