Sweet Fall

My humor dropped. “Why do you define yourself purely by the gang you used to belong to?”

Austin locked me in a stare. “‘Cause that’s all people ever see. They don’t look beyond the surface.” He tapped the star tattoo on his left cheekbone and then the word Heighter on his neck.

“You could get them lasered off,” I suggested.

Austin tipped his head back and laughed. I scowled. Austin then dropped the laughter. “Nah, I can’t, Lex.”

“But—”

“Lexi. I can’t get ’em taken off. It don’t work like that,” he said, making sure I didn’t continue to push the issue.

Austin glanced away, clearly thinking of a darker time, and I sighed.

“Well, I see more, I see a lot more. I see a guy who’s caring for his momma practically on his own. I see a guy breaking because she’s sick. I see a guy who got out of a hopeless situation and he’s striving to get on a better path,” I whispered quietly.

Austin didn’t say anything in response, and, like a coward, I lowered my eyes.

Austin slowly stood, and I lifted my head to look up at him fixing his gaze on the door. But he wasn’t moving.

“I need to go tell Mamma goodnight,” he told me quietly.

“Okay. I hope she’s feeling better,” I said, but I didn’t move. I wanted to wait here until he was gone. It’d been quite the intense night.

But Austin didn’t move either, as if his feet were rooted into the soil.

“Aust—”

“You wanna walk up with me?” he suddenly asked, and I almost reared back in shock.

My brows furrowed and my lack of response had Austin turning to face me with an expectant expression.

“You want me to go with you?” I asked tentatively.

“That’s what I said, didn’t I?” he said curtly and rubbed his hand underneath the bottom of his nose in nerves.

Austin didn’t want to be alone right now, but he was embarrassed by it too.

As I stood, warmth spread within my stomach. Austin was waiting for me. Big, menacing Austin… and he needed me by his side.

As I moved before him, Austin pushed his hands in his pockets and flicked his chin for the door. I followed him out silently.

Austin never spoke all the way up in the elevator, but he stayed no less than an inch from my side. I could smell his fresh-scented cologne and feel the radiating body heat from his skin. There was only silence.

Wait—there was only silence.

The voice in my mind hadn’t spoken in a while. For the first time in days, I had a short reprieve from its incessant temptations and taunts.

The ding of the elevator made me jump, and the heavy steel doors opened to our floor. I stepped out onto the ward… alone.

The heavy doors began to close and, forcing my hands between, they reopened, and I saw Austin standing in the same spot as before. For the second time tonight, my heart broke for him.

Walking before him, I cautiously reached out my hand and laid it on his arm. Dark eyes fixed on mine.

“You okay?” I asked in a soothing voice.

Clearing his throat, he nodded his head. I smiled in encouragement, and Austin led the way down the hallway until we came to a closed door.

A door that remained closed.

Austin’s head dropped, and his finger and thumb pinched at the bridge of his nose. “What the f**k’s wrong with me?”

Clenching my hands in indecision, I eventually lifted one and laid it flat to Austin’s back. “You’re upset. It’s perfectly natural given the situation.”

Lifting his head and cracking his neck from side to side, he glanced at me over long, dark lashes. His grateful expression stole my breath. “Thanks, Lex.”

Rubbing his back, I stepped backward as Austin slowly opened the door. I immediately locked eyes with a beautiful woman laid on the narrow hospital bed, and my heart fell.

Austin’s momma.

“Ciao. Stai bene, Mamma?” Austin said to his momma in Italian, and my eyes widened in shock. I hadn’t realized he spoke Italian. Another secret he’d just bared to me.

“Sto bene… mio caro.” Mrs. Carillo whispered softly, her rapt attention still on me. And I wasn’t moving, entranced at seeing Austin in this light. He was beautiful to his momma. I was beginning to think he may be beautiful, full stop.

Austin moved beside Mrs. Carillo and pressed a kiss to her head. Mrs. Carillo lifted her hand weakly and laid it on Austin’s arm. “Austin… chi è?”

Austin’s eyes moved to the doorway… and to me still standing there, intruding on his privacy, unable to move from staring. I expected his wrath. What I got was a shy smile.