Sweet Soul

“Levi?” My body tensed as she spoke my name. My heart fired off like a damn cannon and I shifted on my feet. I still didn’t raise my eyes, and I heard a small laugh slip from her throat. “I’m Harper. We’ve never been properly introduced.”

Taking a deep breath, I flicked my eyes to hers, but as soon as I saw her watching me with a smile, another rush of embarrassment hit.

I was no good at this type of thing.

I couldn’t talk to girls.

I couldn’t function around them, something inside stealing all my confidence every time—not that I had much to begin with.

“Are you ever going look at me, Levi? Ever going to talk to me?”

I sucked in a deep breath as Harper moved closer to me, and eventually, I lifted my head. I knew my cheeks were hot with embarrassment. I was sure they were about to set on fire when I watched her smile as I peered up through the strands of my hair that had fallen over my eyes.

Harper was pretty. She wasn’t exactly my type, not that I really had a type. I mean, surely a type meant you actually dated girls. I never did. I just knew she wasn’t really what I’d go for if I was to ever ask anyone out.

When I caught Harper’s eyes, she laughed again. “That’s better. Now I can see those pretty gray eyes of yours. Such a rare color.”

I glanced away, when Harper laid a hand on my arm. My head snapped back, and she asked, “You going to the guys’ party this weekend?”

I shook my head. Harper’s face fell.

“Why not? Everyone will be there. The whole team is going.” She paused. “I’ll be there. I was hoping you’d be there too.”

“I…” I cleared my throat, forcing my mouth to move, pushing my lost voice to make sound. “I c-can’t,” I embarrassingly stuttered out.

Dropping my head, I sucked in the corner of my bottom lip. It was instinctive, an innate sign that I was pussying out. It was my damn tell that I was uncomfortable. Hell, that I was standing here dying.

Harper’s hand tightened on my arm, pulling my attention back to her. I wanted nothing more than to get away from this train wreck of a situation. “I hope you’ll change your mind, Levi. I find myself wanting to know you. Know what’s going on in that shy and mysterious mind of yours. You’re an enigma to me. To all of the girls here.”

Seconds passed in strained silence as she waited for me to say something in response. But I had nothing at all to say. I wasn’t mysterious, nor was I an enigma; I was crippled with nerves.

Without looking Harper in the eyes, I curtly nodded my head as a goodbye, and headed back into the locker room. I felt her watching me all the way to the door, but I never looked back.

Seeing the rest of the team beginning to fill the room, and not wanting to get a grilling from Jake and Ashton, I grabbed my sports bag and hightailed it out the door. I rushed to my Jeep and threw myself behind the wheel. In seconds I was on the road, my heart cracking over the fact that my rosary had gone.

It was strange; without those beads, I felt that a piece of my soul had been taken too.

A light rain drizzled against my windshield. As it did, I became lost in my thoughts. The first thing I saw in my mind’s eye was the girl in the locker room: the thief. As I thought of her small hands rooting in my bag, my chest tightened. She was so thin, like starved thin. She was pitted with dirt, her blond hair was unkempt and unwashed. Her legs were like pins in her sodden jeans and her chucks were full of holes.

I frowned, forcing myself to remember the glimpse I’d had of her face. I caught myself swallowing as I remembered those huge blue eyes, sunken into her cheeks. The more I thought of that glimpse, I guessed that she must be a few years younger than me. Younger than me and stealing from a locker room.

Stealing my rosary.

My hands tightened on the steering wheel. I was furious. I was hurt. I was devastated. Yet I couldn’t help but feel sorry for the girl. She reminded me of some of the girls we brought into Lexi’s center; the new center she’d created here in Seattle for troubled teens. The girl had resembled some of the ones I would register into the computer system, when I helped Lexi out during the week. The blonde looked homeless and dirt poor. I shifted on my heated seat. I remembered what it felt like to be poor. I hated seeing the young runaways, or bullied teens, in the center when they’d come in all broken and alone.

I saw my mamma in every one of their faces—silently crying out for help. Soon my anger toward the girl dissipated, only to be replaced by intense sorrow. No one should ever have to feel like that. No one should ever be so broken and alone.

Turning up the speaker system, my favorite song from Band of Horses filled the Jeep. I pressed my foot on the gas pedal and sped all the way home.

Pulling into the driveway, I parked the car in front of the house, and walked in the front door. The sound of soft singing from the living room greeted me—Lexi.

I put my bag on the floor beside the living room entrance and headed in her direction. I couldn’t help but smile when I did. Lexi was holding Dante, her new baby son, in her arms; she rocked him back and forth, singing lullabies to my cute as hell nephew.

Obviously sensing me standing in the doorway, Lexi turned. On seeing it was me, a smile spread on her lips.

“Hey Lev,” she whispered quietly. Lexi glanced back at Dante. I could see, even from here, that his eyes were closed and his breathing had evened out with sleep.

Lexi moved to the Moses basket in the center of the room, and with a kiss to his chubby cheeks, she laid him down. I watched, arms folded over my chest. All I felt was warmth.

I loved Lexi. She was an amazing mother. And even though she was only seven years older than me, she was kind of a mother to me too.

I hadn’t realized I’d been staring at the floor until I saw Lexi’s tiny bare feet in my line of sight. Looking up, her green eyes were watching me in concern.

“What’s wrong, sweetie?” she asked, her black eyebrows pulled down in worry.

Sighing, I shook my head. “Nothing, Lex. Just got off practice early. And I’m kinda tired. Thought I’d come home and get started on my assignments.”

Lexi’s eyes narrowed, but I turned and picked up my bag. “I’ll be in my pool house,” I called back over my shoulder, and walked out of the kitchen door into the backyard. I didn’t hear anything else as I cut through the wide garden and passed the pool. The rain was pouring now, from a gray and overcast sky.