Taken Over (The Ravening #2)(5)
Author: Erica Stevens

Aiden’s dark eyes fixated keenly on the creature lying on the counter. He had become the doc’s assistant, eager to explore and learn anything that Bishop had to teach him. Before the aliens arrived a year ago Aiden had wanted to be a doctor, a scientist, or had wanted to work for NASA even. He had wanted to know the secrets the skies held. Unfortunately we knew the answers to those secrets now, and they had not been as wonderful as Aiden, or any of us, had dreamed. After the aliens arrived our education had become more restricted and NASA had been shut down six months after. Aiden may have lost his dreams, but his curiosity had never waned and he was eagerly turning that curiosity and intelligence to research, and medical training, with Bishop.

“Awesome,” Aiden breathed.

I shook my head at my brother as he hurried forward. We were blood, good friends, and I loved him, but he confounded me. Abby must have just woken him as his honey blond hair, so similar to mine, was disheveled and standing on end. His brown eyes were still swollen with sleep but he was very alert. “You wouldn’t think it was so awesome if you had seen what it did to Sarah,” I said softly.

He turned back to me, his face going slack with horror. “Sarah’s dead?”

“Yes.”

Regret flashed across his handsome features, he looked slightly abashed. “What did it do?” Bishop asked quietly and for the first time not with excitement.

It was Bret that filled them in on the awful events as I couldn’t find the words to describe the horror. I didn’t think there were any. I leaned against the wall, staring at my ratty shoes as I fought the urge to vomit. Darnell joined us in the room, his dark eyes were haunted, his full lips clamped tight. I didn’t know where they had placed Sarah until she could be buried, and I didn’t want to know. I had seen enough of the damage that had been done to her.

“Amazing,” Bishop murmured when Bret finished filling him in on the details.

“Stop saying that!” My tone was far sharper than I had intended, but my fear and anger came surging to the forefront. “They’re not amazing. They’re awful Bishop, they’re awful.”

They all stared at me for a long moment. I had been so emotionless lately that any sign of feeling was a surprise to them. Though they seemed stunned, relief flickered over Aiden’s features. “You’re right,” Bishop said softly.

“What do you say we get some sleep and let the science wizards do their thing?” Bret touched my arm gently; the sympathy in his gaze set my teeth on edge.

I nodded my agreement, I was exhausted, bone weary. I needed to get away from here for awhile, needed to get away from that thing. All I wanted was to lie down for a little bit before we had to do it all over again tomorrow. Abby was sitting on a pile of blankets in the corner of the building that we had claimed as our own. The light of the small lamp highlighted the anxiety radiating from her pretty face. Jenna was next to her, curled up against the wall sleeping soundly.

“That thing really is dead, right?” she asked worriedly.

“It’s dead,” Bret confirmed.

I curled up on my thin pile of blankets and tucked an old sweatshirt under my head as a pillow. Facing the wall, I turned my back on the others, unable to look at them. I was afraid they would see the agony and defeat that was slowly crushing my soul. I stared unseeingly at the night as the others settled in around me. I hated nights the most, when I was alone, when I was stuck with just my thoughts and my heartache. When I was trapped with the realization that I may never see Cade again, never touch him, never kiss him, never have the chance to tell him that I loved him too.

I had always held out some hope that I would find him, held out some hope that one day we would be reunited. It was what had kept me going for the past couple of weeks. After what I’d seen today nearly all of that hope was gone. How did we defeat these things, how would I ever get him back from them even if I did miraculously find him alive? They were everywhere, they were far more powerful than us, and now they had revealed that their monsters could even look like us, not just them.

How could I ever get him back?

For the first time I let myself accept the fact that I couldn’t, that I probably wouldn’t. Agony tore through me; I curled up in a tighter ball as I pressed my fist against my mouth. I bit on my knuckles in order to keep my screams and sobs of anguish suppressed. I couldn’t breathe, could barely see, I couldn’t stand the hurt that was consuming me. I wasn’t survive I could survive this bone wrenching agony. Though tears burned my eyes, I did not shed them, they would not fall.

Cade had once told me that he was the only person I trusted enough to fall apart in front of, and he was right. When he’d been with me he’d made me strong enough to allow myself to let go of my tight self control. I’d trusted him enough to let him see my weakness, my cowardice, my fear, my inner self, and he had loved me for it anyway. He had stripped my soul bare, had made me fall in love with him, and he had left me. He’d sacrificed himself for me when I would have preferred that he hadn’t. He’d left me in this hideous world, one that I was tired of, one that I hated. If it wasn’t for my siblings I wasn’t sure I would continue on, that I would keep fighting. There wasn’t much left to fight for.

I hated my thoughts, hated the weakness they revealed about myself. Most people would want to keep fighting, everyone else in this building did. But I was a coward; I was weak, broken, and barely able to breathe throughout the increasingly long days and nights. Everyone around me was a fighter, a survivor. I was proud of them all. That pride did not extend to myself. I would not leave my siblings, but it was a constant battle to go on for them. If something ever happened to them…

No, it couldn’t. It simply couldn’t. I wasn’t strong enough to survive that too.

I could only try to survive the loss of Cade now. I would not fall apart, I would not cry. I would not give into my weakness, not now, not ever again. There was no point in crying. I still had Abby, Aiden, Bret, Molly, and as much as Jenna and I didn’t always get along, she was a part of our group. She was a connection to a past life forever lost to us all.

I would not fall apart. I had suffered losses before. I had watched my father die; I had lost my mother. I would endure this, I would continue to breathe, I would continue to walk, and I would continue to eat. I would wake up every day, and I would go to sleep every night, and I would continue to go on living without Cade, even though I was dead inside.