Temporary Bliss (Bliss #1)(24)
Author: B.J. Harvey

Guys have it so f**king easy. I swear to God, I totally understand why women in the fifties were told to get up half an hour before their husbands to do their hair and put their make up on because let’s be honest, I don’t know one woman who has ever woken up feeling like sunshine and roses like you see in those tampon commercials.

And speaking of tampon commercials, I certainly don’t walk around with a beaming smile on my face happy with the world that I’m bleeding like a stuck pig for five to seven days and have to stick a two inch piece of cotton fluff up my vagina. No, siree. Definitely not!

But I digress.

Before I know it, the cab is pulling up at his address. After paying him, I get out and walk through the lobby, getting some sideways glances from the well to do suits mulling around. Holding my head up high, and adding a little extra swing in my step, I push the call button and hop into the next available elevator. As soon as the doors close, I smell my arm pits and decide I definitely need some perfume to help disguise the smell of my day. Daniel may be expecting me to be hot and sweaty, but it doesn’t mean I have to smell that way. It’s only been a couple of weeks; we need to keep in this honeymoon period of great sex, more great sex, and occasionally mind blowing, feel it to the tip of your toes sex. And I’d like to have at least one of those three tonight. That’s if he’ll still want me after our little talk.

Shit.

Did I really think this through? Do I need to tell him stuff that I have done the week, the month, the year before I met him? I kind of feel an obligation to tell him about my ‘friends’, especially considering one of them is his old college buddy Noah. I won’t tell him that we call him The Walking Dildo, though. They may be friends, and Daniel is definitely NOT lacking in that department whatsoever, but still. It’s a guy thing. You don’t look down at the urinal because you don’t want to know what your friend is packing.

And it’s not like I’ve seen any of them like that since I’ve met Daniel. I didn’t take up Sean’s invitation for a drink earlier this week, and I’ve seen Noah at work; but there have been no booty calls. As soon as I found out that he was friends with Daniel, that deal was done. His cocky behavior that day was an instant turn off, so there is definitely nothing going on there now.

The doors open and I realize that it’s now or never.

Show time.

Time to come clean to Daniel and at least set him straight after his whole monogamous/commitment sneak attack this morning when he was eight inches deep.

I reach his door and take a deep breath before knocking. He opens the door with a huge smile, the contagious kind that you can’t help but copy.

“Hey, gorgeous.” He steps forward and gives me a soft gentle kiss on the lips. “I grabbed us some Thai from a restaurant nearby. I hope that’s okay.” He takes a step back and ushers me inside. This is the first time I’ve been to Daniel’s apartment, so I make sure to look around. It’s on the fourteenth floor and has a wall of windows on one side, displaying a spectacular view of the city. The kitchen is on the left hand side as I walk in, with a nice white dining table and chairs breaking up the living area and the kitchen.

Daniel walks up behind me and wraps his arms around my waist, resting his head on my shoulders, and I can’t help but lean my head against his. “What do you think? Not bad for a bachelor pad, hey?” he asks, turning his head slightly to plant a light kiss on my favorite spot just below my ear.

“Mmm, it is great. I love the view.” He releases his grip, and I walk towards the window to get a closer look. “Wow, you can see everything from up here.”

“Yup. And from where I’m standing, the view is mighty fine.” I turn around and can’t help but grin as he lifts his eyes up to mine from my ass. “Even in my sexy scrubs?” I ask with a raised brow.

“I think my hot nurse fantasies might be coming true,” he adds with a chuckle.

“Let’s get through dinner first,” I say quickly, trying to shake off the nagging voice in my head that is telling me to fess up now.

“Sure,” he says, confusion covering his face at my shut down. Dammit, am I really that obvious?

We walk over to the dining table, and he pulls a chair out for me. Is there anything Mr. Holy Grail of Hotness won’t do? I’m failing to see any flaws, and I can always see flaws in men. Noah, for example, is arrogant as hell, Sean, for all his domineering greatness, works way too much and Zander…well, he’s a twenty-three year old man stuck in an eighteen year old’s body. Even if I did the whole relationship thing, I wouldn’t date any of them.

But I find myself here, in Daniel’s apartment, after three weeks of dating. I need to tell him. It’s not fair to let him think I can give him a serious, committed relationship when I’m unwilling to give that to anyone. I can’t forget the promise I made to myself. When I left Ohio, that promise was the only thing that held me together. It got me through the loss and the hurt, and helped me put aside the guilt I felt for willing my miscarriage to happen.

“Mac, are you okay? You look a million miles away?” Daniel grabs my attention, snapping me out of my thoughts. He places a bottle of white wine and two glasses on the table and takes a seat opposite me. “Wine okay?”

“Yeah, thanks. And sorry, I’m probably just tired after last night’s exertions and then a full shift today,” I reply with a sly smile.

“Definitely not gonna apologize for the exertions because I hope to repeat them again sometime soon. But I’m sorry you’re worn out. How about we have a bath after dinner? If you love the view, I bet you will love the tub I had put in.” He reaches over to grab my spare hand, squeezing it gently.

Why does he have to be so damn sweet? I mean, seriously. I’m losing my determination to come clean.

“I have f**k buddies,” I blurt out. FUCK! I bring my hand to my mouth in shock at my outburst.

He pulls his hand back and just looks at me, choking on his mouthful of fried rice. “What does that mean?”

Ah well. I’ve done it now.

“Well, a few years ago I got out of a really bad relationship, like mega bad. That’s when I left Ohio and came back to Chicago.”

“I wondered what made you come back,” he says, his voice laced with understanding.

“It wasn’t good, and I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t get attached to anyone again. That I’d never let a man dictate my life, and after this morning when you said that I’m the only woman who you’re sleeping with, I wanted to be totally honest with you. It’s been eating away at me all day.”