The Journey Home(10)
Author: Kelly Elliott

Jack looked at me. “Sometimes, as I’m falling asleep at night, all I can see is her eyes. The hurt in her eyes keeps me awake for hours.”

I swallowed and took in a slow, deep breath. “Is that why you pushed me so hard to find someone? To move on? Because you pushed her away from me?”

Jack gazed out at the lake and slowly nodded his head. “I saw her again.”

Maddie. He saw Maddie.

“What? Where? Where did you see her, Jack?” I wanted to grab him by the neck and shake him.

“About two months ago. I saw her walking out of my lawyer’s office. She didn’t recognize me, and I was going to call out to her, but I couldn’t open my damn mouth. I watched as she walked up to some guy and gave him a kiss on the cheek. I figured it was her boyfriend. I didn’t want to tell you because, if she had a boyfriend, you’d just fall right back to where you were two years ago. I didn’t want to see you hurt again.”

I pushed my hand through my hair and leaned against the truck. I felt sick to my stomach.

“You saw Maddie here? I mean, in Fayetteville? Two months ago, in the same goddamn town where I live, and you didn’t say anything to me? What the fuck, Jack? How the hell could you do that to me?”

“Shit, Cale, I don’t know. I really don’t. Jealousy?”

“What were you jealous of, for Christ’s sake? The girl I slept with two years ago who may or may not have a boyfriend? You knew how much I wanted to find her. You had no right to make that decision for me. You knew she’s all I’ve ever wanted, Jack. You had no right. No right at all.” I pushed my hand through my hair again, trying to calm down. “Fuck!”

I turned to walk back into the house and stopped dead in my tracks. Zoey was standing there, stunned. I couldn’t tell if it was hurt in her eyes or anger.

Oh shit.

She smiled a little, and whispered, “I had to talk to you, I’ll um…I’ll be in the house.”

I closed my eyes and dropped my head. Son of a bitch. I glared at Jack.

“I didn’t even see her walk up, Cale,” he said. “Dude, I’m really sorry. I should have just kept my damn mouth shut.”

I let out a breath and shook my head. “I can’t stay with Zoey now. No fucking way. Not knowing that Maddie is out there, so damn close.”

Jack looked at me, shocked. “What? Wait a second, Cale.” Jack lowered his voice and continued talking. “I know you said you weren’t feeling it with Zoey, but do you really think breaking up with her to go look for Maddie is a smart thing to do? This is a girl who might have a boyfriend or even be married.”

I felt my insides being pulled in two different directions. “I don’t love her,” I said. “At least I don’t right now. It’s not fair for her to be with someone who isn’t able to give her one hundred percent.”

Jack kicked a rock and then looked at me. “Just don’t do something you’re going to regret. Maddie could be gone. She might have just been in town visiting family or a friend. Maybe that girl Monica. She might still live in the city.”

“I need to talk to Zoey,” I said. “Can you return the truck?”

Jack nodded his head. “Yeah, yeah. Of course.”

I started toward the house.

“Hey Cale?” Jack said.

I was so mad that I could hardly think straight.

“I really am sorry for being a dick and a shitty friend.”

I gave him a weak smile and nodded. I continued up the driveway. I really liked Zoey, and I enjoyed our time together, but I needed to be honest with her. I couldn’t wait another minute to do it.

Around the corner, I bumped into Zoey.

“Oh God, sorry!” she said. She looked flushed.

“Zoey were you out here the whole time?”

She blushed like she’d just been caught eavesdropping. Looking everywhere but my eyes, she said, “Um, no. I was coming out to talk to you because…well…Cale I really need to tell you something. It’s important.”

I nodded, following her inside. She sat down on the sofa and stared at the floor.

“I’ve been keeping something from you.”

I sat in the chair opposite her.

I knew it. I knew she had been keeping something from me.

She took a deep breath. “I have to be completely honest with you.”

I nodded. “Okay. Honesty would be great. It’s apparently been lacking around here lately.”

She smiled weakly. “When I first meet you, Cale, I didn’t think anything would come of this relationship. I thought you were hot, and I came on to you because of a dare and, honestly, I thought maybe we’d hook up and that would be it. That’s kind of how I live my life. I don’t get attached to anyone, but you forced me to break that rule. Cale, I’m falling in love with you, hard.”

I sucked in a breath. Shit. I needed to nip this in the bud and fast.

I was about to speak, but Zoey did what she always did—she cut me off, taking the lead.

“Let me get this all out first, Cale. It’s important, please.”

I nodded.

“Cale, I don’t really know how to say this, but…I’m sick. Actually, I’m slowly dying.”

I sat there, stunned. “What?”

She swallowed hard, and I watched as a tear rolled down her cheek. “I’m really sick, and I know it wasn’t fair of me to keep this from you. I had no idea I was going to fall in love with you. I thought we’d have fun and move on.”

I shook my head to clear my thoughts. “Wait. Zoey, what’s wrong with you?”

She took in another deep breath and blew it out. “I have an autoimmune disease. Put simply, my body is attacking my kidneys and liver. My doctor said I could have twenty years or five years. They don’t really know. I’ve been taking some experimental drugs and I haven’t been sick in a long time.”

“Can’t they…I mean…can you get a new kidney or liver?”

She let out a throaty laugh. “I’m not a candidate for a transplant. My doctors told my parents that if I follow their directions, eat right, and stay stress free, then I’ll live longer. My mother has been on me for the last few years to settle down and find someone who will make me happy…make me give up my hectic life.”

My head was pounding. I stood up and began pacing.

I turned and looked at her. “Zoey, I’m so sorry this is happening to you. I wish…I mean…”