The Journey Home(39)
Author: Kelly Elliott

“Oh, God. Please don’t let me wake up to find this is all just a dream. I want nothing more than to be here. Right here where I am.” Gazing back at Lily, I continued, “Your daddy is an amazing man. I knew from the first moment I spoke to him. He charmed me and, before I knew it, I was in love. But I was so scared. I’d never experienced those feelings before, and the way I felt with him…” I chuckled. “I just didn’t know what to do with those feelings. I was starting a new job that was going to have me gone for six months. After meeting your dad, I didn’t want to leave. I wanted to stay with him forever and, let me tell you, that scared me. So I did what I did best when faced with something I didn’t want to deal with. I ignored it. It was the hardest thing I’d ever done, the moment I told your daddy I wasn’t interested in a relationship.” Lily stopped drinking, as if she was trying to focus on the story. I laughed and set the bottle down, before burping her.

“None of that matters now. It was a very long journey for me and your daddy. But we got you out of the deal, so that’s a big positive.”

Lily let out a burp that would put any man to shame.

“Good one.”

My skin felt like it was on fire. I must have had at least a dozen butterflies dancing in my stomach when Cale touched me on the arm.

I smiled at him. “Just spending some girl time together.”

He laughed and sat down across from me. “What a beautiful morning,” he said. “Want to take Lily on a walk before it gets too warm?”

I nearly jumped up as I said, “Yes!”

Cale must have known how much I’d missed Lily—he was totally letting me hog his daughter.

“May I give her a good morning kiss?” he asked as he pouted.

I giggled and handed Lily to him as I said, “If you must take her from me.”

Cale scooped Lily up into his arms and began walking across the deck. I pulled my legs up and tucked my knees under my chin as I watched the two of them together. I’d never seen a man so in love before. The way he looked at Lily made my heart soar. My eyes burned with tears. I wanted to share that with him—that bond. I looked away when I realized that I couldn’t. Lily wasn’t mine. As much as I wanted her to be mine, she was Zoey’s daughter. Zoey and Cale’s. What would I be to her? Would I ever be given the chance to give Cale a child of our own?

I quickly wiped a tear away as I looked out over the water. When I realized that Cale was standing in front of me, I tried to pull myself together. I didn’t want him to know I was upset so I jumped up and began to walk back into the house.

“I’ll go get her a jacket.”

Cale gently took hold of my arm and stopped me. “Maddie, look at me.”

I closed my eyes and fought like hell to stop my silly crying. “I…I can’t.”

Cale turned me around and I stared at my feet.

“Maddie, please look at me,” he begged. “Please don’t push me away. Tell me what you’re thinking. What you’re feeling.”

I looked into his eyes. “I wish it had been me.”

He tilted his head, confused. “What had been you?”

I glanced down at Lily, who was now sleeping peacefully in her father’s arms.

“I wish I had been the one to give you…to…” A sob escaped me as I tried to control my emotions.

Cale placed his hand on my cheek. “Tell me. Please.”

“I wish Lily was mine. I wish I’d been the one to give you your first child. I want so much to be…to be…” I finally just let it go and started crying. “I’m so sorry I pushed you away. I wanted it to be me. Oh, God, how I wanted it to be me.”

Cale gently pulled me into his arms and kissed the top of my head. “Baby, please don’t cry. It tears my heart out to see you cry. You and Lily are my whole life now. It’s just the three of us.”

I pulled back and met his eyes. “How can you forgive me? How can you just let me walk back into your life?”

He smiled. “Because I love you. And Lily loves you. Because I need you and she…” he looked down at Lily and smiled bigger. “She needs you, Maddie. When I think of my future, I can only imagine it with you. Don’t you know by now? You’re my everything.”

I sucked in a breath. “I think I’d better go home and pack a suitcase.”

Cale laughed. “I think you’d better pack more than a suitcase. I just got you back—I have no intentions of letting you go.

THE MINUTE I opened the door and walked into the house, I smiled. Maddie was in the kitchen singing to Lily. I’d been coming home from the office to this same scene for the last month.

I set down my briefcase and inhaled what smelled like lasagna…and cake. “Maddie? I’m home, baby.”

Maddie peeked around the corner and smiled. “Welcome home, Daddy. We have big plans for Miss Lily’s three-month birthday party this evening.”

I laughed, shaking my head. “Oh yeah?”

When she stepped around the corner I about dropped to my knees. “Oh, yeah. Daddy gets his gift first though.”

My eyes took in every inch of her body. She was dressed in a red corset, thigh-high stockings, and white heels. I moved my eyes back up to her beautiful face. Her hair was piled on top of her head in a messy bun.

“Um…I wasn’t aware that it was my birthday today, too,” I said as I discarded my jacket and began loosening my tie.

Maddie bit her lip and shook her head. “It isn’t.”

“Why the gift then?” I stood in front of her, immediately drawn to her emerald eyes.

“Because both our parents are coming over this evening for the party, and with your parents staying the night, I thought we might…play before everyone gets here.”

I closed my eyes and moaned before opening them again. “Have I told you today how much I love you?”

The smile that played across her face had my dick rock hard. She put a chocolate-covered spatula in her mouth and moaned before pulling it out and pouting. “Not in at least six hours, but you should probably give Lily some loving before I ask you to make love to me in the kitchen.”

I swallowed hard and looked over to Lily sitting in her swing with a huge smile on her face. My mother said Lily could sense the love between Maddie and me. I was starting to think my mother was right.

I cupped Maddie’s face in my hands as I leaned down to kiss her. “I love you,” I whispered against her lips.