The Program (The Program #1)(33)
Author: Suzanne Young

The handler tsks. “You should be more careful.” He walks over to my closet and pulls out a clean pair of scrubs and my robe, laying it over the bed. “Help you get dressed?”

“Hell no,” I say, sitting up in the bed. “And I’m pretty sure this is sexual harassment.”

He smiles. “How so?”

I’m not sure if making my skin crawl is enough of a reason to file charges, but I won’t mind taking the chance. “Get out or I’ll call Nurse Kell,” I say, motioning to the door.

The handler shrugs. “If you want.” He starts walking that way and then stops, looking back at me. “But what if I can offer you something?”

“I don’t want anything from you.”

“Not even a memory?”

I pause, but then push back the blankets to climb out of the bed. “What do you mean?”

The handler beams under my attention. “If I can save you a memory, something you could take out of here with you, would it be worth it?”

I swallow down the sick feeling in my stomach. “Would what be worth it?”

His eyes narrow deviously then, scanning over my body. I instinctively fold my arms over my chest and step back from him. “Being friends,” he says, but the tone is nothing short of sinister.

“Just leave,” I snap, pointing behind him.

He nods, not looking fazed in the least. “You think about it, Sloane. If you change your mind, you know where to find me.”

“Drop dead.”

He opens the door, but as he walks out, he says nonchalantly, “Wonder how much you’ve lost already.” And then he’s gone.

I stand there, staring at the closed door. What I’ve lost? I look suddenly to my hand, but the finger is naked. The purple heart ring that I always wear is at home in my mattress. I wouldn’t forget that. James gave it to me when . . . I stop, thinking. A spike of fear rushes over me. He gave it when . . . Oh, God.

I cover my mouth, realizing for the first time that a memory is gone. I stumble back against my bed, my mind racing over everything I can think of. The ring. How did I get the ring?

There’s a quick knock at the door. I’m sure it’s the handler, so I yell out for him to go away. The door opens, and Dr. Francis is standing there, his eyebrows pulled together.

“Sloane,” he says carefully, “Roger said he couldn’t get you to come out of your room. Is something the matter?”

Yes, there is so much the matter that I wouldn’t know where to start. But I can’t turn in Roger for being a creep. Not yet. Not in case he can help me. I clear my throat and straighten, putting on a calm exterior. Let’s see if Dr. Francis can call bullshit.

“He woke me up and I was cranky,” I say. “I think my medication is too strong.”

Dr. Francis purses his lips as if thinking this over. “Maybe you just need to get used to the dosage.”

“Maybe,” I respond, my voice bitter. He nods then, stepping away from the door.

“It’s time for lunch, and the staff is concerned that you’re not eating enough. Nurse Kell tells me you’ve lost four pounds since arriving.”

“No fast food,” I respond. “Bring on the chicken nuggets, and I’ll eat the hell out of them.”

He laughs then, looking relieved that I can make a lame joke after all. “I’ll see what I can do,” he says. “And I’ll adjust your medication dosage. We want you to feel comfortable. I know this is a difficult transition.”

I smile, clenching my teeth so hard I’m afraid they’ll break. A difficult transition? Yeah, that’s a fair assessment. Dr. Francis waits as I go in the bathroom and change into my clean scrubs, wrapping my robe tightly around me. I still try to search my mind for the story of the ring, but I know it’s gone. I’ve lost a piece of James and it’s so devastating that I have to stare at my reflection for nearly a minute before I can pull myself together.

As I head out behind the doctor into the hallway, I keep my mind trained on a single thought, holding it close to me. James, James, James.

CHAPTER SIX

AFTER TIME IN THE EXAMINATION ROOM WITH DR. Francis—just a basic physical and blood test to make sure I’m taking my meds—I’m sent to lunch, where I sit alone in the corner. I drink some juice and take bites from an apple, but don’t bother with anything else. I’m too upset about the ring. When I leave and find myself in the mostly deserted leisure room, I sit again at the window and stare out.

I continually take cautious glances around for Roger, wondering when his slimy self will show up, asking for a trade. Wondering if I could say no when it means keeping a part of myself.

“Psst . . .” I look over my shoulder and see Realm by the door, holding something behind his back. No one else notices him, and I feel myself smile. Come here, he mouths.

I’m not sure I should go, but the room is quiet and I’m bored. I get up to find out what he’s doing. Realm grins madly when I approach, and I follow him into the hall. “Wait here,” he says, poking his head around the corner toward the nurses’ station.

“What’s behind your back?” I ask, trying to look over his shoulder between him and wall.

“Hey, hey, sweetness,” he says, glaring at me. “No peeking.” He checks one more time and then does some weird hand signals like we’re in the military.

“What?” I ask.

“Run.” He rushes ahead of me, and we dash down the hall and through the stairwell door. He eases it shut and I stand there, sort of shocked.

“That was close,” he says.

“What are we doing?”

“Hiding out. I have contraband.”

“But if they find us—”

“They won’t. No rounds for another twenty minutes. Sit.” He points to the stairs behind me.

Since I’ve already broken the rules by coming out here, I sit down on the concrete, crossing my legs as I stare at him. “Now will you show me what you have behind your back?”

He smiles broadly and pulls out a white bag, the logo on the side unmistakable.

“No way.”

“A little birdie told me you wanted chicken nuggets.”

“Realm! How did you—”

“Shh . . . ,” he says, looking toward the door. “This isn’t on the menu, so if they see it, they’ll take it. Now do you want it or not?”

My brother and I used to beg our parents for McDonald’s every Saturday. We’d have to clean our rooms, do the dishes, all sorts of chores that we totally blew off, knowing our parents would get it anyway because my father was hooked on the fries.