The Struggle
"What’s going on, Elena?" said Bonnie from the back seat. "What did you think you were doing, running away from school like that? And how could you come out here?"
Elena hesitated, then shook her head. She wanted nothing more than to tell Bonnie and Meredith everything. To tell them the whole terrifying story about Stefan and Damon and what had really happened last night to Mr. Tanner – and about after. But she couldn’t.
Even if they would believe her, it wasn’t her secret to tell.
"Everyone’s out looking for you," Meredith said. "The whole school’s upset, and your aunt was nearly frantic."
"Sorry," said Elena dully, trying to stop her violent shivering. They turned onto Maple Street and pulled up to her house.
Aunt Judith was waiting inside with heated blankets. "I knew if they found you, you’d be half-frozen," she said in a determinedly cheerful voice as she reached for Elena. "Snow on the day after Halloween! I can hardly believe it. Where did you girls find her?"
"On Old Creek Road, past the bridge," said Meredith.
Aunt Judith’s thin face lost color. "Near the graveyard? Where the attacks were? Elena, howcould you?…" Her voice trailed off as she looked at Elena. "We won’t say anything more about it right now," she said, trying to regain her cheerful manner. "Let’s get you out of those wet clothes."
"I have to go back once I’m dry," said Elena. Her brain was working again, and one thing was clear: she hadn’t really seen Stefan out there; it had been a dream. Stefan was still missing.
"You have to do nothing of the kind," said Robert, Aunt Judith’s fianc¨¦. Elena had scarcely noticed him standing off to one side until then. But his tone brooked no argument. "The police are looking for Stefan; you leave them to their job," he said.
"The police think he killed Mr. Tanner. But he didn’t. You know that, don’t you?" As Aunt Judith pulled her sodden outer sweater off, Elena looked from one face to another for help, but they were all the same. "Youknow he didn’t do it," she repeated, almost desperately.
There was a silence. "Elena," Meredith said at last, "no one wants to think he did. But – well, it looks bad, his running away like this."
"He didn’t run away. He didn’t! Hedidn’t – "
"Elena, hush," said Aunt Judith. "Don’t get yourself worked up. I think you must be getting sick. It was so cold out there, and you got only a few hours of sleep last night…" She laid a hand on Elena’s cheek.
"I’m not sick," she cried, pulling away.
"And I’m not crazy, either – whatever you think. Stefan didn’t run away and he didn’t kill Mr. Tanner, and I don’t care if none of you believes me…" She stopped, choking. Aunt Judith was fussing around her, hurrying her upstairs, and she let herself be hurried. But she wouldn’t go to bed when Aunt Judith suggested she must be tired. Instead, once she had warmed up, she sat on the living room couch by the fireplace, with blankets heaped around her. The phone rang all afternoon, and she heard Aunt Judith talking to friends, neighbors, the school. She assured all of them that Elena was fine. The… the tragedy last night had unsettled her a bit, that was all, and she seemed a little feverish. But she’d be good as new after a rest.
Meredith and Bonnie sat beside her. "Do you want to talk?" Meredith said in a low voice. Elena shook her head, staring into the fire. They were all against her. And Aunt Judith was wrong; she wasn’t fine. She wouldn’t be fine until Stefan was found.
Matt stopped by, snow dusting his blond hair and his dark blue parka. As he entered the room, Elena looked up at him hopefully. Yesterday Matt had helped save Stefan, when the rest of the school had wanted to lynch him. But today he returned her hopeful look with one of sober regret, and the concern in his blue eyes was only for her.
The disappointment was unbearable. "What are you doing here?" Elena demanded. "Keeping your promise to ‘take care of me’?"
There was a flicker of hurt in his eyes. But Matt’s voice was level. "That’s part of it, maybe. But I’d try to take care of you anyway, no matter what I promised. I’ve been worried about you. Listen, Elena – "
She was in no mood to listen to anyone. "Well, I’m just fine, thank you. Ask anybody here. So you can stop worrying. Besides, I don’t see why you should keep a promise to amurderer. "
Startled, Matt looked at Meredith and Bonnie. Then he shook his head helplessly. "You’re not being fair."
Elena was in no mood to be fair either. "I told you, you can stop worrying about me, and about my business. I’m fine, thanks."
The implication was obvious. Matt turned to the door just as Aunt Judith appeared with sandwiches.
"Sorry, I’ve got to go," he muttered, hurrying to the door. He left without looking back.
Meredith and Bonnie and Aunt Judith and Robert tried to make conversation while they ate an early supper by the fire. Elena couldn’t eat and wouldn’t talk. The only one who wasn’t miserable was Elena’s little sister, Margaret. With four-year-old optimism, she cuddled up to Elena and offered her some of her Halloween candy.
Elena hugged her sister hard, her face pressed into Margaret’s white-blond hair for a moment. If Stefan could have called her or gotten a message to her, he would have done it by now. Nothing in the world would have stopped him, unless he were badly hurt, or trapped somewhere, or…
But Stefan was in trouble, and she had to find him somehow. She worried about it all through the evening, desperately trying to come up with a plan. One thing was clear; she was on her own. She couldn’t trust anyone.
It grew dark. Elena shifted on the couch and forced a yawn.