Tirade (Heven and Hell #3)(11)
Author: Cambria Hebert

I pushed myself to my feet and began to pace the confines of the cell.

When I stumbled over the body in the woods at Kimber’s party, grief like no other stole over me. I was blinded by rage, by despair, by denial. I thought Heven lay there broken and dead. I thought I failed her. Then, when I realized it wasn’t my Heven, I was so relieved I wanted to do everything I could to keep something like that from actually happening to her. So I did it. I dragged the body into the lake.

I never thought about Andi. I never thought about her family and the fact they would never know a moment’s peace. It was wrong. I was wrong.

When I got out of here, I was going to fix it.

Heven

Fresh sea air took over my senses and tore my hair out of the confines of the band that struggled to hold it back. I pushed at it impatiently and turned to watch the city of Portland get farther away. Peaks Island was only two miles away from Portland, which took fifteen minutes to travel by ferry. I got lucky and arrived just as a ferry was about to depart, so I didn’t have to sit at the docks and wait.

I thought this was a good sign.

Considering how rough the earlier portion of my day had been, I felt relieved.

I looked out across the sea… The waving, dark water made me remember the slight panic I woke up in earlier. I think I had been dreaming about dark, choking water. And regret. But Sam had been there, our link holding strong, vanishing my might-have-been dream and moody feelings. It was hard to get out of bed. I would’ve liked to lay there and talk with him all evening and into the morning. But that wasn’t an option. I had a lead. A lead that not even a slight fever would keep me from chasing.

Getting away from Cole and Gemma had proved harder than I thought. They were both still pretty concerned about me and didn’t want to let me out of sight. It only got worse when I refused to tell them where I was headed.

But I was stubborn and wasn’t about to be held back.

Gemma was the one who finally relented and talked Cole down from his overbearing, big brother mood. Although she never said, Gemma seemed to understand a lot of what I was going through. It made me wonder, and not for the first time, what was in her past. Whatever it was changed her, shaped her into the person she was today. What had she been like before? Had she been like me? Is that why she stuck around and offered to train Sam how to fight and share with us the wealth of knowledge she carried?

I shook my head, clearing my thoughts and turned my face toward the wind, imagining it blowing away all unnecessary thought. It didn’t matter why Gemma was helping us, just that she was. And it didn’t matter I was going to have to deal with Cole’s anger when I saw him again.

Peaks Island was drawing very near and my pulse sped up. I tried to remind myself this might be a dead end, that I might not get what I wanted. But I couldn’t seem to calm myself.

Then I remembered how I got here. Guilt weighed a lot and it brought me crashing down.

I stole the information right out of Sam’s head. He hadn’t even realized what was happening. And I hadn’t told him. To be fair, I didn’t really understand how I managed to see his thoughts—his memories. I only prayed he could forgive me when he found out.

The ferry docked and a few minutes went by before I could get off. I left Sam’s truck back on the mainland, choosing to ride over and then travel on foot. When I stepped onto the wooden dock, I looked up and really noticed the island for the first time.

Peaks Island was part of Maine, one of the two hundred twenty-two islands that made up Casco Bay. It was one of the most populated islands along the coast and it was breathtakingly beautiful. From every angle the place looked like it belonged on a post card. It probably was.

Not far from the dock were charming cobblestone streets that paved the way toward lively summer attractions. It was nearing eight so there wouldn’t be much daylight left, but I wasn’t worried. I had a feeling what I was after preferred the dark.

Because it was summer, the streets were busier than I expected. I looked around, wondering where I should begin. Museums, art galleries, various shops, boating and fishing rentals all lined the quaint streets. It was so utterly beautiful and charming here that I got swept up in the moment and closed my eyes, pretending Sam and I were here together with no other purpose but to have fun.

Then someone bumped into me from behind and I snapped out of it. I wandered along the streets for a while, stopping to browse in a few shops and store windows. All the while I scanned the crowd.

I wasn’t even sure if I would know when I found what I wanted.

Soon, the sun set and it was dark. There was lighting on the streets, but not enough to completely illuminate everything, and for the first time, I began to doubt my plan. What if the memory I saw in Sam’s mind was too old and no longer useful? I closed my eyes and called the image to my mind to study it.

Sam was standing in his old apartment, the one he shared with China and two other hellhounds. Except China was dead and his roommates had left town at his request. I was pretty sure this particular memory was from the day Sam and I went to clear out the place so he could move into his new efficiency. The bedroom around him was bare from when they cleared out all their stuff.

But they left something behind.

A hastily scrawled note.

Someone left it laying in the center of the bare mattress.

There was only one thing written on it. It was a place. Peaks Island.

When I asked Sam if he knew where they went, he said no, but this is the image that popped into his head. His roommates might have left, but they hadn’t gone far and they had told Sam where they would be. Why had they told him? Why didn’t Sam tell me?

Yes, Sam lied to me, but I didn’t care. He was only trying to protect me. After all, I had lied to him for the same reasons. When I opened my eyes, the streets seemed a little more vacant than before and I wondered how long I had been standing there. I walked a little more, intently studying the faces of everyone who passed, to no avail.

There were no hellhounds here.

Feeling completely deflated, I turned to make my way back to the ferry, hoping I hadn’t missed the last shuttle back to the main land. It never occurred to me to check the schedule. A large fishing boat had just docked for the day and I could hear the rowdy group of workers as they laughed and hauled the fresh oysters and lobsters onto the deck of the boat. I don’t know why, but I walked past the ferry boat toward the fishing boat. I grabbed the strap of my bag and held it tightly as if it would anchor me.

The closeness of the sea was starting to get to me. I hated the water. The one time Sam tried to teach me to swim and be comfortable around water, it had ended in me being attacked by a red-eyed demon (who I later found out was Beelzebub) who broke into my head, leaving behind a thread so he could stalk me in my dreams.