True Believer(40)
Author: Nicholas Sparks

“I’ve got to get a rental car,” he said.

“I’ll be happy to take you,” she said. “I’m going that way.”

When she saw him hesitate, she smiled. “And I’ll let you drive,” she added.

He never let the speed drop below eighty and shaved forty-five minutes from the three-hour drive; dusk was setting in as he approached the outskirts of town. With random images of Lexie floating through his mind, he didn’t notice the passage of time, nor could he remember much of the drive. He tried to rehearse what he wanted to say or anticipate how she would respond, but he realized that he had no idea what was going to happen. It didn’t matter. Even if he was flying by the seat of his pants, he couldn’t imagine doing anything differently.

The streets of Boone Creek were quiet as he approached downtown. Doris turned toward him.

“Would you mind dropping me off at home?”

He glanced at her, realizing that they’d barely spoken since leaving the airport. With his mind fixed on Lexie, he hadn’t even noticed.

“Don’t you need your car?”

“Not until tomorrow. Besides, it’s too cold to be walking around tonight.”

Following Doris’s directions, Jeremy pulled to a stop in front of her house. At the small white bungalow, he could see her newspaper propped against the door. The crescent moon hovered just above the roofline, and in the dim light, he glanced at himself in the rearview mirror. Knowing that he was only minutes from seeing Lexie, he ran his hand through his hair.

Doris noted his nervous gesture and patted him on the leg. “It’s going to be okay,” she said. “Trust me.”

Jeremy forced a smile, trying to hide his doubts. “Any last-minute advice?”

“No,” she said, shaking her head. “Besides, you already took whatever I had to give. You’re here, aren’t you?”

Jeremy nodded, and Doris leaned across the seat to kiss him on the cheek.

“Welcome home,” she whispered.

Jeremy turned the car around, the tires screaching as he sped back toward the library. Lexie had mentioned keeping the library open for people who came in after work, hadn’t she? In one of their conversations? Yes, he thought, he was sure of it, but for the life of him, he couldn’t remember when. Was it the day they’d met? The next day? He sighed, recognizing that his compulsive need to review their history was simply an attempt to calm his nerves. Should he have come? Would she be glad to see him? Any confidence he had evaporated as he neared the library.

Downtown appeared in sharp focus, in contrast to the dreamy, misty images he remembered. He drove past Lookilu and saw half a dozen cars parked out front, saw another group of cars clustered near the pizza place. A group of teenagers was loitering on the corner, and while he initially thought they were smoking, he realized it was simply the warmth of their breath condensing in cold air.

He turned again; on the far side of the intersection, he saw the lights from the library blazing on both floors. He parked the car and stepped out into the cold night air. Taking a deep breath, he strode quickly to the front door and pulled it open.

With no one at the front desk, he stopped to peek through the glass doors that opened into the downstairs area. No sign of Lexie among the patrons. He swept his gaze around the room, making sure.

Figuring Lexie was either in her office or in the main room, he hurried down the corridor and up the stairs, where he glanced around before heading toward her office. From a distance, he noted that the door was closed, no light spilling out beneath it. Checking the door, he found it locked, then searched among the aisles as he made his way to the rare-book room.

Locked.

He cut a zigzag route through the main room, walking quickly, ignoring the stares of people who no doubt recognized him, then ran down the stairs. As he headed for the front door, he realized that he should have checked for Lexie’s car and wondered why he hadn’t.

Nerves, a voice inside his head answered.

No matter. If she wasn’t here, she was probably at home.

One of the elderly volunteers was emerging with an armful of books, and her eyes lit up when she saw him approaching.

“Mr. Marsh?” she called out in a singsong voice. “I didn’t expect to see you again! What on earth are you doing here?”

“I was looking for Lexie.”

“She left about an hour ago. I think she was heading to Doris’s to check on her. I know she called earlier, and Doris didn’t answer.”

Jeremy kept his expression steady. “Oh?”

“And Doris wasn’t at Herbs, I know that much. I tried to tell Lexie that Doris was probably running some errands, but you know how Lexie worries. She’s like a mother hen. Drives Doris crazy sometimes, but she knows that it’s just Lexie’s way of showing that she cares.” She paused, suddenly realizing that Jeremy hadn’t explained his reappearance. Before she could say another word, however, Jeremy cut her off.

“Listen, I’d love to stay and chat, but I’ve really got to talk to Lexie.”

“About the story again? Maybe I could help. I have the key to the rare-book room, if you need it.”

“No, that’s not necessary. But thank you.”

He was already past her when he heard her voice behind him.

“If she comes back, do you want me to tell her you came by?”

“No,” he called out over his shoulder. “It’s a surprise.”

He shivered as he stepped into the cold and ran back to the car. He pulled onto the main road, followed the curve to the edge of town, watching as the sky grew even darker. Above the trees, he could see stars, thousands of them. Millions. For an instant, he wondered how they would look from the top of Riker’s Hill.

He turned onto Lexie’s street, saw her house, and felt something give way when he saw no lights shining from inside and no car in the drive. Reluctant to believe his eyes, he passed the house slowly, hoping he’d made a mistake.

If not at the library, if not at home, where was she?

Had she passed him on the way to Doris’s? He tried to think. Had anyone passed him? Not that he remembered, but he really hadn’t been paying attention. He was sure he would have recognized her car, anyway.

He decided to swing by Doris’s just to make sure, and—driving too fast through town while watching for her car—he sped back to her white bungalow.

One look was all it took to see that Doris had already gone to bed.

Still, he paused in front of the house, trying to figure out where Lexie had gone. It wasn’t that large of a town and the options were few. He thought immediately of Herbs, but remembered it wasn’t open in the evening. He hadn’t seen her car at Lookilu—or anywhere else downtown, for that matter. He supposed she could have been doing something mundane: grocery shopping or returning a video or picking up dry cleaning . . . or . . . or . . .

And with that, he suddenly realized where she was.

Jeremy gripped the steering wheel, trying to steel himself for the end of his journey. His chest was tight and he could feel himself breathing too quickly, just as he had earlier in the afternoon, as he’d taken his seat on the plane. It was hard to believe that he’d started his day in New York thinking he would never see Lexie again, and now here he was in Boone Creek, planning to do what he thought was impossible. He drove the darkened roads, still unnerved by the thought of what Lexie’s reaction to his return might be.

Moonlight lent the cemetery an almost bluish color, and the tombstones seemed to glow as if lit dimly from within. The wrought-iron fencing added a spooky touch to the ethereal setting. As Jeremy approached the cemetery’s entrance, he saw Lexie’s car parked near the gate.

He pulled up behind it. Climbing out of Doris’s car, he could hear the ticking of the engine as it cooled. Leaves crackled underfoot and he took a deep breath. He placed his hand on the hood of Lexie’s car and felt the warmth radiating through his palm. She hadn’t been here long.

He passed through the gate and saw the magnolia, its leaves black and shiny, as if they’d been dipped in oil. He stepped over a branch and recalled groping his way through the cemetery on that foggy night with Lexie when he’d been unable to see anything. Halfway through the cemetery grounds, he heard an owl hoot from one of the trees.

Leaving the path, he moved around a crumbling crypt, walking slowly to keep the noise to a minimum, climbing the slight incline. Above him, the moon hung in the sky as if tacked to a blackened sheet. He thought he heard a low murmur, and when he stopped to listen, he felt an intense surge of adrenaline. He had come to find her, to find himself, and his body was readying him for whatever came next. He crested the small hill, knowing that Lexie’s parents were buried on the other side.

It was almost time. He would see Lexie in just a moment and she would see him. He would settle it once and for all, here where it all began.

Lexie was standing just where he imagined she would be, bathed in silvery light. Her face had an open, almost mournful expression, and her eyes were a luminous violet. She was dressed for the weather—a scarf around her neck, black gloves that made her hands mere shadows.

She was speaking softly, but he couldn’t make out the words. As he watched, she suddenly paused and looked up. For the longest moment, their eyes simply held one another.

Lexie seemed frozen in place as she stared back at him. Finally, she looked away. Her eyes focused down on the graves again, and Jeremy realized he had no idea what she was thinking. He suddenly felt that it had been a mistake to come here. She didn’t want him here, she didn’t want him at all. His throat tightened, and he was about to turn away when he noticed that Lexie wore the slightest smirk on her face.

“You know, you really shouldn’t stare like that,” she said. “Women like a man who knows how to be subtle.”

Relief flooded his body, and he smiled as he took a step forward. When he came close enough to touch her, he reached out and placed his hand on her lower back. She didn’t pull away; instead, she leaned into him. Doris had been right.

He was home.

“No,” he whispered into her hair, “women like a man who will follow them to the ends of the earth, or even Boone Creek, if that’s what it takes.”

Pulling her close, he lifted her face and kissed her, knowing that he would never leave her again.

Epilogue

Jeremy and Lexie were sitting together, cuddled beneath a blanket, staring down at the town below. It was Thursday evening, three days after Jeremy’s return to Boone Creek. The white and yellow lights of the town, interspersed with occasional reds and greens, seemed to be flickering, and Jeremy could see plumes of smoke rising from chimneys. The river flowed black like liquid coal, mirroring the sky above. Beyond it, the lights from the paper mill spread in all directions, illuminating the railroad trestle.

Over the past couple of days, he and Lexie had spent a lot of time talking. She apologized for lying about Rodney and confessed that driving away as Jeremy stood on the gravel road at Greenleaf had been the hardest thing she’d ever done. She described the misery of the week that they’d been apart, a sentiment that Jeremy echoed. For his part, he told her that while Nate wasn’t thrilled with his move, his editor at Scientific American was willing to let him work from Boone Creek, provided he made it back to New York regularly.

Jeremy didn’t mention that Doris had come to visit him in New York, however; on his second evening back in town, Lexie had brought him over to Doris’s for dinner, and Doris had pulled him aside and asked him not to say anything.

“I don’t want her thinking that I was interfering in her life,” she said, her eyes shining. “Believe it or not, she thinks I’m pushy.”

Sometimes he found it hard to believe that he was really here with her; on the other hand, it was hard to believe that he’d ever left in the first place. Being with Lexie felt natural, as if she were the home he’d been seeking. Although Lexie seemed to feel the same way, she wouldn’t let him stay at her house, insisting, “I wouldn’t want to give the folks around here something to gossip about.” Nevertheless, he felt reasonably comfortable at Greenleaf, even if Jed still hadn’t cracked a smile.

“So you think it’s serious between Rodney and Rachel?” Jerremy asked.

“It seems that way,” Lexie said. “They’ve been spending a lot of time together lately. She beams every time he shows up at Herbs, and I swear he blushes. I think they’ll be really good for each other.”

“I still can’t believe you told me you were going to marry him.”

She nudged her shoulder against his. “I don’t want to go into that again. I’ve already apologized. And I’d rather you not remind me about it for the rest of my life, thank you very much.”

“But it’s such a good story.”

“You think so because it makes you look good by making me look bad.”

“I was good.”

She kissed him on the cheek. “Yes, you were.”

He pulled her closer, watching as a shooting star skimmed the sky. They sat in silence for a moment.

“Are you busy tomorrow?” he asked.

“That depends,” she said. “What did you have in mind?”

“I called Mrs. Reynolds, and I’m going to check out some houses. I’d like it if you came along. In a place like this, I wouldn’t want to find myself in the wrong sort of neighborhood.”

She hugged him tighter. “I’d love to come.”

“And I’d like to bring you to New York, too. Some time in the next couple of weeks. My mom’s insisting that she have a chance to meet you.”

“I’d like to meet her, too. Besides, I’ve always loved that city. Some of the nicest people I’ve ever met live there.” Jeremy rolled his eyes.

Above them, thin strands of clouds floated past the moon, and on the horizon, Jeremy could see a storm approaching. In a few hours, the rains would come, but by then, he and Lexie would be sipping wine in her living room, listening as the raindrops pelted the rooftop.